BOOGER RED & COWBOY IX

CHAPTER IX~

Ben surprised me by attending our Church on Sunday. I told him it was a Family tradition to attend Christmas eve services.

“Would you like to join us, Master!” I asked, knowing he was Muslim.
“I’d be honored to join you. Jesus is recognized by my faith as a Great Prophet and Holy Man. I enjoyed the services last Sunday and the Sermon by your Pastor. Yes, I would like to go with you very much!”

It was a bone chilling cold night in Texas that Christmas Eve. Our Family all piled into Dad’s Big Bronco and headed for the Church. Aunt Laura was already there waiting for us. It was so cold Dad had to loan Ben his big sheep lined jacket.

We hugged and kissed Aunt Laura and settled down in the pews. The Church was warm and radiant. There were no lights, only candles everywhere. The Women and Kid’s of the church had decorated it until it was a wonderland of greenery and red ribbons.

I had never seen that little Church look more beautiful. Ben was impressed as his eyes got real big when he saw the wonder of the transformation from Sunday.

I had explained to him about ‘communion’ and the meaning of the sacraments. He was free to take them with us or decline. No one would say a word one way or the other. He chose to join us. He saw no harm in taking the Christian communion. He thought it was a wonderful sentiment and felt it an honor to participate.

The service began and the Children did a Christmas pageant that was charming, funny, and touching. Complete with Carols sung at the appropriate places. I was a bit melancholy as it was my first Christmas since I had returned from Nam and my three friends were not here, by my side. But having Master Ben next to me helped. Our legs were so close together I ran my hand to my side and between our legs. I soon felt his big hand join mine and gently squeeze it.

I felt kind of funny until I looked over and saw Dad secretly holding Uncle Joe’s hand too. I smiled to myself and thanked God for my Family that Christmas Eve. We were a rough looking Crew. The only Family there that had a wonderful Black man as a member and an Arabian Prince next in line for the throne of a small but wealthy Country. God had truly blessed us with the best!

When it finally came time for the communion we knelt at the alter with Dad in the middle, Joe and Lester on his right, me, Ben, and Aunt Laura on his left. In a symbolic gesture he encompassed all of us in his big arms for a few seconds and then joined in the communion. I lost it. I had tears coming from my eyes and looked to see that there was not a dry eye among us. For once I didn’t have to feel bad that I was being overly emotional.

It was one of the most moving and personally wonderful Christmas’s I can remember. I had lost so much this past year but I had gained so much more. It was a lesson to me to thank God for the here and now, to thank him for the past and those that we loved and someday will love again.

No matter what life brings us its up to us to gather the goodness and joy from life and return it to our creator. Some time the old sayings come home to roost: When God closes one door he opens another!

I even said a prayer for Red. To empty my heart of hurt and pain. I prayed that he was somewhere warm and cared for. Yes, even in the arms of T-bo if that’s what he needed. I felt bad that we couldn’t be together this Christmas but maybe that would cement a more solid bond between us.

When the service was over we left the Church to a brilliantly clear sky! Colder than an ice cream headache! We all stopped and marveled at the stillness, the canopy of stars made it truly a night of wonder. Suddenly, you didn’t feel the cold so much. The fire in our hearts, the warmth of love and of belonging surrounded us with a glow that stayed the night from our bodies.

Soft winds had swept it as if to make it ready for a King’s ball. All it’s candles were lit. All it’s lanterns were glowing! There had never been such a night.
We had our own young King from the Orient far, a black Man with the soul of a King as Melchior, and my beloved and devoted Uncle Joe as the retiring but ubiquitious Caspar.

What more could any Family wish for?

Christmas morning our Family gathered, had breakfast and started exchanging gifts around the tree that Dad, Uncle Joe and Lester had gotten the week before. Ben had ask Dad to take him shopping one afternoon in the next larger town and bought gifts for all of us.

I had spent my spare time tooling a Western Belt for Ben with his name on it. He had admired mine and Phil’s. I hid it in Lester’s room and worked on it as I could. I finished it the day he and Dad went shopping. It came out really nice. The best one I ever made.

We had a great time exchanging gifts and my Dad almost shit when he opened his gift and there was a gold Rolex watch. Uncle Joe and Lester got the same gifts from Ben. They were three matching watches engraved. From Ben with love, Christmas 1968. Dad got tears in his eyes and hugged Ben. Uncle Joe and Lester did the same.

Ben gave me three beautiful Western shirts and a pair of Western Boots. I handed him his gift from me. It was a small package and I began to feel bad that I hadn’t spent more on him. He slowly opened it and pulled out the hand tooled belt and was speechless. He hugged and kissed me and got a wee bit misty eyed.

“This means more to me than you will ever know, Cowboy. I will cherish this for many years!” He put it on and it fit him perfectly. He had to find a mirror to look at himself. He was thrilled.

My second gift to Ben was a pair of spurs that had been my Uncle Buds. Aunt Laura had given me all his old Western Clothes, boots and spurs. He had about five or six pair in all. I wanted Ben to have a pair of his spurs for the memory of him. Ben cried like a baby in my arms he was so moved.

Dad, Uncle Joe and Lester gave the last gift to Ben. They surprised the Hell out of me. Lester had taught me leather work for the belt I made for him. When he set his mind to it he was a real craftsman. He had hand tooled a Western cut brown leather vest for him. Ben tried it own and it fit him perfectly. He shed more tears as he hugged Lester thanking him for such a personal gift.

Dad and Uncle Joe had bought him a matching pair of ‘bat wing’ Rodeo Chaps and Lester had tooled his initials on the bottoms. Ben was so excited and thrilled he had to try them on immediately and he looked great. I made him wear all that gear to bed that night! He proved to be one Hell of a Buckeroo! Knew how to use them spurs too! Damn!

It was one of the best Christmas’s anyone could remember in a long time. Aunt Laura, Louise, Suzie, Phil and Wilma Jo and the Kids arrived and the women went to fixing Christmas dinner for all of us. Ben and I tried to help but they ran us out. Ben didn’t know what to get the Ladies so he gave Aunt Laura a Gift Certificate to the Local Department Store for three hundred bucks. He gave Louise, Suzie, and Wilma Jo certificates for two hundred each.

He and I had gone shopping together and he bought Phil the biggest damn Silver Belly Stetson Hat you ever saw. I knew the size that Phil wore and knew his taste in hats. He almost shit his pants! He was thrilled and hugged Ben in thanks. He hadn’t expected anything from Ben nor had Wilma Jo.

He gave Wilma Jo and the Kids gift certificates for anything they wanted. Ben was a very generous Man. He loved these folks that had opened their hearts to him.

Christmas dinner was unbelievable. Ben couldn’t believe the amount of food that came out of Dad’s kitchen. We were being sent down to the only little store in town still open for last minute things that we hadn’t thought about. We enjoyed it. It gave him and I a chance to be alone for a few minutes. He was having a ball.

“I hate to bring up bad things but you know that call from Harry a couple of nights ago? Well, I have to be in Los Angeles day after tomorrow. So I’m afraid I only have one more day to visit and really should catch a flight out tomorrow night!”

“Hell Master! I’m just so grateful for the time we’ve had together that isn’t bad news. You’ve been so generous with your time and gifts to us. We all love you! I’ll make arrangements with Dad so I can take you to San Antonio tomorrow afternoon.”

Ben ate like a condemned Man and Christmas dinner would be his last! My Dad thought it was wonderful and kept passing Ben the bowls. I kept telling him that there was dessert but that didn’t slow him down. The Women loved any Man that really enjoyed their cooking. I had asked Ben if I could reveal his true identity to the assembled since tomorrow would be his last day and he agreed.

At the table, over coffee and dessert I asked Louise if she would like to tell her story of confronting me in the diner. She smiled, winked at me and began.
“Well, I knew’d this handsome Man weren’t no friend of Billy’s from Los Angeles, right away! Besides, Billy’n me go’s back a long ways! Hell, we grew’d up together! In the same class all through school! He never could keep no secrets from me! I just put two and two together and confronted Billy that first day I met Ben!”

Ben, me, Dad, Lester and Uncle Joe were laughing with Louise. Suzie still hadn’t put it together. Phil and Wilma Jo were clueless. I had told Aunt Laura but she would have died before she told a soul.

“Well, who IS HE then, Louise?” Asked Suzie innocently.
“He’s the Prince, Honey!” Suzie looked at Ben and me and I nodded my head with a smile.

“Well I’ll be damned!” Said Big Phil. “Hell, he sits a good Horse for a Prince. I just thought he was one of your Rodeo Buddies from California.
“Me too!” Said Wilma Jo. “I hope you’ve enjoyed your visit, Ben. We’ve been glad to have you with us!”

“You folks don’t know what it’s like being in my position. I apologize for the deception but these good folk, whom I now consider Family, gave me a chance to just relax, be myself and enjoy your company without putting on ‘airs’! I haven’t enjoyed myself and had as much fun with a group of people in years. Well, since I was a Kid! I love you all for just letting me be me. For welcoming me into your lives. And thanks, Louise for keeping my secret!”

Everyone was silent but there wasn’t a dry eye in the room. My Dad broke the silence.
“Ben, you’re my Son as much as Cowboy, if you ever need us or need a place to escape, our doors are always open to you. Never feel that you have to ask! Just come on home! We’ve all come to love you in the last week and you’ve contributed so much to our happiness this Christmas, that alone is your single greatest gift to us.” Dad got up and walked over to Ben. Ben stood and Dad hugged him. Everyone applauded. Ben cried in my Dad’s big arms. I know how he felt. My old Man had a way about him!

The phone rang and Dad went to answer it. I felt it was probably Red. Dad came back in with a big smile on his face.
“It’s for you, Cowboy!” Was all he said.
“Who is it, Dad?” I asked warily.
“It’s not Red, Son! Go on, answer it!”

“Hello.” There was a silence on the other end of the line.
“When I get my hands on you, Cowboy, I’m gonna’ turn you across my knee and not let you up ‘till you holler ‘Uncle’” I recognized the deep voice of my Cowboy in Glen Rose. Leon! I started laughing and couldn’t stop.

“You promise?” I asked laughing. “‘cause don’t get my hopes all built up if’n you don’t mean it!” Leon roared with laughter on the other end.

“I damn well mean it! But, shit, that was the nicest Christmas gift I’ve ever received. Walker and Xander rolled it out of their garage this morning and gave me your card. I almost pissed my pants you little shit!”
I couldn’t stop laughing.

“Do you like it, Cowboy?”
“Do I like it? No! I love it! All the way down to the leather saddle bags Walker said you insisted on so I wouldn’t forget I’m a Cowboy! Your Cowboy!” I was still laughing. Leon never said too much but he was letting me have it and I loved it. It was worth every penny to buy him that Bike!”

“When are we gonna’ get to see you, Cowboy! I have more than a spanking to give you, Son!” He laughed.
“I have a friend in for Christmas that I’m taking to the San Antonio Airport tomorrow afternoon. I’ll come home, hop on the Bike and I can be in Glen Rose tomorrow evening late if’n that’s alright with you and Walker.

“No! Wait until the next morning to start out. I don’t want you on the roads over the Holidays at night! I would worry myself sick until you got here. Wait until the next morning early.”

“O.K., Cowboy! I’ll see you good folks day after tomorrow. Love you, Cowboy and Merry Christmas!”
“Love you too, you little shit! Ride safe! You don’t want to be late for your spanking!” Leon laughed.
“I’ll be there and take it like a Man, Cowboy!”

It was the day after Christmas and Ben could only get a flight out to LA that left at noon. We got up early and the whole damn Family wanted to go with us to the Airport. Dad, Uncle Joe, Lester, me and Ben piled into Dad big Bronco and headed for San Antonio.

Ben was quiet most of the way and we didn’t take the back way through the hill country. We took a more direct route to San Antonio. We got Ben to the Airport an hour before the flight left. He wanted us to go on back but we weren’t about to.

Dad was upset that Ben was leaving. Didn’t say anything but he had really meant what he said at Christmas. He had come to think of Ben as a second Son and it made me feel really good. They called Ben’s plane to depart for Los Angeles. Dad was the last to say his goodbyes and took Ben in his big arms.

“Ben, don’t be a stranger! Even if the Cowboy isn’t in Mason and you need to get away. Give us a call and we’ll be here to pick you up. You can go and do or just hide out there at the house. No one has to know your there. None of our town folk would say a word. They’ve all come to love you and you’d be safer with us than in your own Country.”

Master Ben got tears in his eyes again as he spoke to my Dad.
“I will Dad! Now I know how Cowboy feels when he talks about having more than one Dad to love and how wonderful a feeling it can be. You all have been wonderful to me. I love you, Dad!”

“God! I love you too, Son!” My old Man hugged Ben tight before he had to walk up the ramp to the plane. He turned, smiled and waved. We watched his plane leave and we headed back to Mason.

It was a quiet ride. Even old Lester was a bit down in the mouth.
“That Man has a way of growing on ya’, don’t he?” Everyone was silent for a moment.
“He sure does, Lester! He sure does!” I answered for all of us.

“Dad? How long a trip is it to Glen Rose from Mason. Two hours? Four?”
“I’d say it’s about a four hour trip, wouldn’t you Joe?”
“Yeah! About that!”
“I want to take off early tomorrow morning to visit the Johnson Ranch.”

“We really enjoyed our visit with Walker, Xander and Leon when we went to get Dolly and Madison. Best steaks I ever had! Right Joe?”
“They were damn good, Son! By the way, that Leon is one mean looking hombre!”

“Yeah! I know!” I said smiling sweetly. They all laughed knowing exactly what I was getting at.

“Was that him on the phone yesterday, Son?”
“Yes Sir! He called to thank me for his Christmas Gift!”
“What d’ju give ‘em?” Dad asked.
“A new Harley Davidson!”
“Shit! I’d call you too!” Dad laughed.
“Hell, I’d call you Santa Clause!” Said Lester. We all laughed.

“Yeah! Told me he was gonna’ turn me over his knee and spank me!”
“Joe seems to enjoy it ever now and then!” Dad whooped. Lester roared.
Uncle Joe just blushed. Poor Uncle Joe. Dad really loved him.

Uncle Joe took the cue and let me be alone with my old Man that night.
I didn’t know if I was going to be back this way for a while and wanted to spend the rest of the Holidays with the folks at Johnson Ranch. They all had been so damn good to me this last year. Besides, I needed my Cowboy!

I pleasured my Old Man. I turned that old son of a bitch every way but loose. He got in some of the best ass fucking from his Kid he ever got in his life. He was hot, horny and ready for some Boy Butt.

I liked my new sober Dad! He had the stamina of a raging Bull! He fucked me three times that night and I sucked him off twice. It was like we were storing up our love for winter!

We got up real early the next morning and I decided to take my Family to breakfast at the Diner to say goodbye. I called Phil and Wilma Jo to join us and Aunt Laura. She declined and told me goodbye on the phone and thanked me for my Christmas gift. I thanked her for mine.

We had a wonderful time at breakfast. Phil and Wilma Jo were sad to see me go but knew I’d be back. Louise and Suzie were in tears. I tipped them both fifty bucks. Everyone seemed to know that Billy was leaving this morning and all had to hug me and wish me well. Course it had gotten all over town that my friend Ben was that “Prince” fellow who’s life I’d saved. He sure was a nice fellow they all allowed.

I couldn’t get comfortable on my Bike on the way to Glen Rose. Every time I moved, my sore ass hole would complain. I’d just smile to myself remembering, then I’d get a roaring hard on just thinking about my Old Man up there deep in side of me rootin’ around for all he’s worth.

I had to pull off on a lonely stretch of road behind a billboard and jack off, my old ass was twitching so bad. When my Old Man fucked me, I stayed fucked for several days! It’s a wonder I could walk, let alone ride that damn Bike!

I got back on my Bike, started off, hit a huge bump, hurt my ass like Hell, and got another roaring hard on. What the fuck’s wrong with me? T’weren’t me!

It was that damn good fucking that Old Man of mine threw in me! I loved that old son of a bitch with all my heart! They don’t make ‘em no better’n my Dad! I’m proud to wear his name! After that, I found myself heading for the bumpy patches in the road just to keep that silly smile on my face!

I rolled into Glen Rose about noon on a Thursday. I rode up in front of the Johnson Ranch and there was Leon’s new Harley parked by the garage. I parked right by it. Everyone came out of the big house to welcome me. Leon got to me first, grabbed me and spun me around as he hugged me.

“Damn, it’s good to see you, Cowboy! You little shit! I should turn you over my knee right here!”
“Oh please wait, Stable Master! Until I’ve got my clothes off so’s I can really enjoy it!” He kissed me instead.

“Cowboy!” Walker held his arms open for me. “Damn, you look so much like Bud! Every time I see you it takes my breath away.”
“Me too!”Said Xander! He hugged and kissed me too. “Great to see you again! Glad you could come spend some time with us.”

I went in and joined them for lunch. I caught them up on everything including Ben coming to spend Christmas with my Family. I was tired of holding back about me and Red so I told them what he had done to me. Walker was not pleased.

“Booger has to have something really bothering him for him to do something crazy like that. He was so in love with you when you left for Vietnam and searched for you continuously for months after you got back. We were all glad to hear that you had finally gotten together and hoped everything would work out.”

“Then we saw you and his picture in the papers having saved this Arab Prince’s life. We were worried about you because of all the blood you had on you We could tell you were holding the other guy and it looked like he was more hurt than you. We called your Dad and he said you were fine.”

“I’m not real happy to hear about this. Red shouldn’t have treated you that way. Especially when you were just learning to get back on your feet again. There were periods around here we were truly worried about you.”

“I think the turning point was that night you stood up and told everyone just what you’d been through and how we all had been lied to about what was going on over there. You started opening up after that and began to heal by leaps and bounds. Then you began to help Wes and that’s when you really began to come around.”

“Of course credit has to be given where credit is due. Our Stable Master here for all his silence is a damn good listener!”
“I wouldn’t have made it if’n it hadn’t been for Leon!” I said quietly.

“Maybe my Christmas gift was a bit extravagant but damn it, Leon, I just wanted to do something special for someone who loved me enough to stop and listen. And you did! By the hour! ‘Till I almost drove you crazy!”

“Com’ere!” Was all Leon said and I went to his big arms for him to hold me close. He put his big hand on my head and just held it next to his heart as he embraced me. Then he gently kissed me on top of my head.

I showed them all the ring that Ben’s Dad had given me. Walker almost fainted. He knew good jewelry and knew immediately what it was worth.
“The stone alone is worth a million and a quarter, Cowboy!” He said.

“You really shouldn’t be carrying that thing around with you. It should be in a bank vault somewhere.”
“Who would believe it was real? On a Biker Bum?” I asked him.
“Someone that knew good jewelry, Son! And there are a lot of people out there that do! Trust me!” He made me think!

“By the way, Red has called here about a dozen times asking if we’d heard from you. We hadn’t so I told him the truth but I knew exactly where you were. I didn’t tell him though!”

“How’d you know Master Walker?”
“I know who I’d run to if I had a Dad like yours!” He laughed and Xander did too.

“I’ll second that, Cowboy! What a fucking hunk your old Man is and his partner, your Uncle Joe, is drop dead good looking. Two fine looking Men!”

“Yeah! They came to pick up Dolly and Madison several weekends ago and ended up staying with us several nights. We really enjoyed getting to know them. They were great company. Your Dad can tell some of the funniest damn stories!”

“You could have left Dolly and Madison here. They were fine and Leon was taking good care of them. Hell, you sent us money to take care of ‘em! But your Dad wanted to take them to Tucson to Dan Yates. We didn’t try’n stop him ‘cause we felt since he was your Dad he probably had your blessing!”

“Well, I expressed to Dad I felt kinda bad just dumping them on you even if I paid and I guess he took that to mean I’d like them elsewhere. I know Dan would love to have them so maybe it’s best. Makes it awkward for me not being able to see Dan because of Red. But Dad and Dan have become big friends and are Rodeoing together. My old Man and Uncle Joe kicked me and my partner’s Butts at team roping while I was home.”

I spent that afternoon helping Leon clean out the stalls in the Barn. It felt good to get out doors and do some hard work again. Again we didn’t talk much but there was a flow that went back and forth between us that said volumes. Every now and then he’d pretend to stumble into me and I’d catch him to steady him. Of course he’d have to hold me in his big arms for a few minutes, hug and kiss me to thank me. He didn’t fool me for a minute.

Walker cooked steaks on the grill by the pool. We ate inside because it was still damn cold at night. Those steaks sure warmed me up. Walker handed me the key to my old apartment over the garage.
“We haven’t moved a thing. It’s just like you left it. I don’t think anyone’s been in there but Xander to clean it yesterday.”

“Thanks Master Walker! I’ll throw my things in there but I was hoping I was gonna’ get an invite to stay in the bunk house with the Stable Master tonight. It’s a cold night and he looks meaner than I remember. Maybe someone to keep him warm tonight might make him look a little more mellow.” Leon just reached over with his big paw and rapped his arm around my neck and pulled me to him.

“Sure sounds good to this old Cowboy, I’ll tell you!” We finished dinner and I helped Xander clean up afterward. It was like old times being back on the Walker Ranch. It was my second home.

“What should I tell Red if’n he calls here again, Billy?”
“I’m tired of running Master Walker! I wasn’t the one that did wrong. I don’t feel guilty. Tell him the truth. I’m here and with your permission I’d like to stay through New Years.”

“Stay longer than that if you want to, Son! You know your welcome here and I know the Stable Master would love to have your help.”

“I don’t want to involve you good folks in Red’s and my quarrel. I’m gonna’ get back on the road shortly after New Years. Just tell him not to show up here that I’ll find him, on down the road, later. If he doesn’t abide by my wishes and shows up here there’s no chance of us riding together anymore. I need this time away from him and he’ll just have to cope with it!”

“I don’t think that’s too much to ask of him! He was way out of line. In fact he told the story much the same way you did and told me that he was a fool. He’s so ashamed of how he treated you. Maybe this will be a lesson to him. Let’s hope so. Do you still love him, Cowboy?” I was silent for a long time.

“Silly question, wasn’t it?” Master Walker allowed.
“Wasn’t silly, Master. You just know the answer.”
“Yeah! I do.”

Leon and I were getting ready to make the cold walk to his quarters over the stable when the phone rang. It was Red! Walker answered the phone.

“Hello!”
“Yeah Red! He’s here!”
“No, he’s out in his apartment right now. He’s gone to bed. I don’t think he wants to talk to you yet anyway.”

No! He just got here this afternoon. No! No! I don’t think that would be a good idea right now Red. No Red! That would be the wrong thing to do. You can’t force someone to love you, Red!”

“The Kid gave you his love and trust and you fucked over him so naturally he’s hurting right now and needs to be with people that care about him.”

“I know you care about him but coming here is not the right thing to do right now. He said to tell you that he’d find you after the Holidays sometime. If you try to come here and force the situation I can guarantee you Cowboy will never ride by your side again!”

“Because he told me so, Red!”

“Now your not making any sense, Red! I don’t want to be mean spirited ‘cause you and I’ve been friends for years but you’re not welcome here as long as Billy’s here and this thing between you isn’t settled. If you try to come here I won’t let you see him, do you understand?”

“No, he told me to tell you he was here! He didn’t want me to lie to you! He’s tired of running and hiding for something he didn’t do!”

“I, for one, am disappointed in you, Red! I’ve never known you to do something to hurt another person like that!”

“I know! I know! Well, if you call tomorrow I’ll tell you the same thing. But if your sober, maybe you’ll understand better.”

“Alright, Red! O.K.! You too! Goodbye!” Master Walker hung up the phone shaking his head.

“He’s been drinking.” Was all he said.

I went to Master Walker and hugged him.
“Thanks Master Walker for caring about me. I feel good about telling him the truth. I don’t think he’ll come here. Red ain’t stupid! He may be hurting too but he won’t throw the Baby out with the bath water!”

Leon and I left after saying good night to Master Walker and Xander. I grabbed my bag from my Bike and walked with the Stable Master, arm in arm, in the cold still night air to his quarters over the barn. It was cold! Body rattlin’ cold!

We got inside and started up his little Franklin heater and in minutes the place was toasty! I started looking around and he had rearrange a few things. He had put up this big cork bulletin board and had it filled with photos. Most all of them were of him and me that I never knew were taken. They were great pictures! All taken by Xander with a tele-photo lens.

He had a zoom optic lens and could take pictures of us from far away and we would have no idea he was taking them. There were some great shots of Leon and I roughhousing. Buck-naked in the river holding each other. Cleaning out the barn. Digging post holes. Laying out in the pasture, bare ass naked, on a quilt to get some sun. Us making love on the quilt. He and I on horseback riding together. Leon and me roping in the arena. Leon and me kissing on horseback. On and on.....

They were hot, beautiful, and well done! Wasn’t a bad picture in the bunch.
“Damn Sweetheart, these be some fine pictures!” I said quietly. “I’m wowed!”
“Didn’t know how you’d take to ‘em, Cowboy!”

“I love every one of them! It shows two Men enjoying each other and obviously sharing love!”
“I knew you’d see that in the pictures the same’s I did! That’s why I keep them up here. I look at them every night and they make me happy! I still love you, you know?”

“I love you too, Cowboy! You’ll always be my Cowboy!”

I spent a night in bliss with my Cowboy. He was better than I’d remembered. I lay in his arms afterward and again thanked God for friends like Master Walker, Xander and Leon that I never had to worry about running to if I needed them. I needed that week in the arms of my Savior, Leon.

There’s just something about recharging your broken spirit from those that love you. It’s like going to a pool and drinking deeply from the waters of life itself. They become your ‘training wheels’ to get you back up and riding back into the sometime harsh reality of life. They help you get back on your Horse after you’ve fallen off!

I worked my ass off with Leon that week taking care of some projects around the ranch that had been put off because it required more than two hands to get ‘em done. I certainly didn’t mind. It was like the summer I had spent there mending my spirit. We worked well together and made love half the night. It seemed the harder we worked the harder we fucked.

Leon knew I couldn’t stay and may never be his totally but that wasn’t gonna’ stop him from loving me while he could. Master Walker and I taught him to ride his Bike. He sat a good looking Bike. He looked as hot on that Bike as he did a Horse. He made one Hell of a’ mean, bad ass, looking Biker. Master Walker, Xander and I couldn’t help but laugh to each other how mean he looked on that Bike.

We took a couple of short runs here and there to get him use to the road and he took to it like a natural. He got to really enjoy the feeling of that big Bike under him. The vibration would make him hornier than a Bull in a pasture of fresh heifers. I got the snot fucked out of me after our little runs.

“Still glad you bought me that Beast?” He’d huff and puff as he was enjoying gettin’ some deep stuff into my ass.
“Best investment I ever made in my life, Cowboy! Fuck me harder!! Show me how you ride a Harley, Stud!” He would have to stop fucking me he’d be laughing so hard.

“You’re no damn good, Cowboy!” He’d laugh, “That’s why I love you so much!” Then he’d laugh harder and start fucking me again with a vengeance. He made it a good one for the both of us. Thought I’d start climbing the wall when he finally hit his and signaled me to get mine.

Never been so completely drained by anyone in my life as Leon could empty me! He claimed I’d done the same for him! All I know was that by the time New Years rolled around I was buffed again from working around the ranch and horny twenty four/ seven! Leon and I fit together like a hand in a glove. He claimed he’d never been hornier since riding that damn Bike and he loved it!

Red had called every other day. He asked to talk to me each time and Walker didn’t lie to him. Most of the time I wasn’t available but when I was, I’d just shake my head ‘no’ and Walker would just explain that I wasn’t ready to talk to him yet!

He called New Years eve and I told Walker I’d speak to him.
“Howdy Red!”
“Hey Cowboy! How you doing?”
“I’m O.K., Red! How’re you?”
“Miserable!”

“Sorry to hear that.”
“Really?”
“You should have stopped with “Sorry to hear that!” Red!” I laughed. He giggled nervously.
“Awh, come on, Cowboy, have a heart! I love you so Goddamned much I hurt when you ain’t with me.”

“Contrary to popular belief I do have a heart, Red, and somehow it got severely damaged! Hard to get a damaged heart working again, Red! You should know that!”

“I do know that! What will it take to repair it?! To patch things up between us?! I’ll do anything you want, anything you ask??”
“Where are you now?”

“Fort Worth, in a cheap Motel, in hopes I could come see you!”
“No! I don’t want to involve my loved ones in our problems so call me the day after New Year’s Day and I’ll meet you somewhere on the road.”

“O.K.!”
“But, Red.....”
“Yeah, Cowboy?”
“It ain’t gonna’ be like’n it was! I may consent to ride and sleep with you but I ain’t calling you my Master and I ain’t gonna’ be your slave.”
“Well, let’s just take it one step at a time.”

“You heard what I said, Red! Don’t even get it in your head that I’m gonna’ change my mind. Won’t happen! I won’t trust you like that again, Red! Take it or leave it!”

“Just give me a chance, Billy, just give me a chance! That’s all I ask!”
“O.K.! Then give me a call the day AFTER New Years Day and we’ll talk!”
“I love you, Cowboy!”
“Yeah! Well, we’ll see. Bye Red.” I hung up the phone.

“Bravo!” Said Master Walker echoed by Xander. “Couldn’t have put it to him better myself, Cowboy! You didn’t leave yourself open and you gave him just enough! Good for you, Kiddo!”

“Why do I feel so empty inside then? I wanted to scream at him, ‘I love you to you son of a bitch, why did you do that to me?’ Then I realized there was no answer that would have made me feel any better! He just chose to do it and we both have to deal with it but I don’t have to sell my soul for his stupid mistake and if I let it be like it was it’ll just say to him he can get away with doing it again to me.”

“You feel empty ‘cause the son of a bitch ripped your heart out and now wants everything back the same way it was. He knows it can’t and won’t be that way and is frustrated as Hell! He’s not ready to accept the fact that he fucked up and has to accept the consequences.”

“You’re not ready to give him the same trust he enjoyed and we can’t blame you. Look! If he gets too tough to deal with, you’re always welcome to run back to us and I’ll damn well see to it he doesn’t bother you until this thing blows over between you.”

“I appreciate that Master Walker and I just might if’n I need to, but I’m hoping it won’t come to that. Buck told me in a dream I had to ride with Red for some reason and that’s good enough for me. Maybe this separation will mellow him and I can ride with him as a Buddy.” They both looked at me and raised an eyebrow to which I started laughing at my own naivete’.

“Yeah! Who’m I kidding?” We all laughed.

Master Walker was planning a small New Year’s eve party and naturally Leon and I were invited. Some of their friends from Ft. Worth-Dallas were driving to Glen Rose. Leon and I got dressed up in our best Cowboy duds and arrived shortly after all the other guest had arrived.

It seemed like I had Western clothes at all my homes. Mason, Glen Rose, Tucson, Mt. Washington, and now I had some left at Master Ben’s suite in Reno and Las Vegas.

It was early evening. The Sun had just set. All the guest had arrived. I thought! Another truck pulled into the lot in front of the house. I didn’t look to see who it was. The door bell rang and Master Walker asked me if I would get it! I was happy to and opened the door.

There stood two of the best looking, hottest Cowboys I’d ever lay my eyes on. It was my Old Man and my Uncle Joe. They’d driven up for the evening and to stay the night with Walker and Xander. Hell, they had plenty of room.

They could even stay in my place ‘cause I was staying with my Cowboy tonight. Leon and I even wore matching Western shirts. A touch that didn’t go uncommented on by that randy group of Men.

My Dad and Uncle Joe were in a party mood but I never saw them take a drink! They were sober when they arrived and they were sober at midnight. I was so impressed when my Old Man came to kiss me a Happy New Year I got emotional.

“I’m so proud of you and Uncle Joe!” I whispered to him.
“For what, Son!”
“Being sober! I really like my new sober Dad and Uncle!”

“Well, thanks, Son! So do we! We don’t fight no more! I get and give him better sex! We’re better ropers.....or do I have to remind you of that?”
“Uuugh, No! Been there! Done that! You won, fair and square!”

I told him about my ride to Glen Rose and having to stop behind a billboard. Thought my Old Man would bust a gut laughing. He thought that was the funniest damn story he’d heard in years.

“Glad to know I did you some good, Son!”
“You certainly did, Dad, you certainly did!!”

“I’ll just bet that mean ass looking Cowboy’s been doing you some good as well! Is he really as mean as he looks?”
“Meaner Dad, much meaner! Heeee’s BAD!” We laughed together. He got my drift.

“Funny thing is, Dad, Leon is probably one of the sweetest Men you ever wanted to meet in your life......that is until you crawl in bed with him! Then he changes into a dangerous Animal. Much like you, come to think of it!!” I had my Old Man laughing so hard I thought he was gonna’ puke!

My Dad wanted to see my Christmas gift to Leon and quite a few of the guest make the trip to Master Walker’s garage to see his new Harley. Leon was so proud of that Bike. He was quiet but you could see the way he touched it that it was special to him. Dad told me later I’d done a good thing! He approved!

It was a great New Year’s eve party and Leon and I stayed close to each other. He knew that I’d be leaving in a couple days and wanted to feel as close as he could. I wanted him close to me as well.

I loved the attention. He loved having me on his arm at the party and I catered to him shamelessly! He and I talked quietly and left shortly after New Years to go have our own private Rodeo in his quarters over the stables. We said our goodbyes to the hoots and hollers of all assembled, “Y’all have fun, now, y’a hear!”

The entire time I was there at the Johnson Ranch, sleeping in Leon’s arms, I didn’t have one bad flashback. He almost acted like a tranquilizer for my soul. Sometimes I wish that it had been meant for Leon and I to be together but knew in my heart it was not to be.

He did too. He was the one that told me when I was staying on the Ranch before. But, like he told me, let’s love each other while we can. We did! Still do. Where ever he is today I still love the Man.

New Years Day we were up early. We Rodeoed in Leon’s bunk ‘till late but we slept peaceful and felt good come morning. I did get to suck him off in the shower though. Which sent him through the day with a smile on his face. Not to be missed by my Dad and Uncle Joe. They got to talk to Leon a little and decided he was a fine Man. Of course, Leon’s opinion of me went a long way in that decision.

They left to get back to Mason around noon and we said our goodbyes. I told them both about talking to Red and that I was meeting him tomorrow.
Dad didn’t seem too upset. I think he trusted me to do the right thing. He had set a good example for me as a Kid. Uncle Joe offered a bit of sage advice.

“Don’t live with abuse, Son! You don’t have to! If he isn’t serious then come home. He’ll have a Hell of a time finding you among the people that love you!” I hugged him and thanked him for taking care of my Old Man all these years. I told him I loved him a lot. Uncle Joe got a little emotional.

I spent the last night with Leon and once again we tried to cram as much love into a brief period of time as we could. I knew I’d see Leon again but I just didn’t know where or when.

Buck liked him! He told me so! Told me to thank Leon for him for taking care of me. I did. Leon just looked at me funny and held me tight. He knew I wasn’t kidding!

Red called the Ranch first thing early in the next morning as we were having breakfast and Walker handed me the phone.

“Hey Red!”
“Hey Cowboy! Have a good New Years?”
“Yeah! My Dad and Uncle Joe drove up from Mason and stayed the night! It was a great surprise!”
“Sounds like you had fun!”

“Yeah! It was nice! What’s up?”
“You wanna’ meet me some where!”
“No, just come on by here and pick me up and we’ll take off together! I already talked with Master Walker and Xander and they said it would be alright!”
“Great, I’ll be there in a couple of hours. See you then, Cowboy!”

“O.K., Red!”
“I love you, Cowboy!”
“O.K., Red. See you when you get here. Bye!” I hung up the phone.

Leon and I had said our goodbyes and he left for the Stables. He didn’t want to be around when I took off with Red. I could understand ‘cause I didn’t want to have to wave goodbye. I loved him too much for that!

Red arrived hugged and kissed me. I responded but was not as warm as I could have been. He said ‘Hello’ to Walker and Xander, had a cup of coffee, apologized to Walker for being drunk when he called that one time. I already had my stuff on my Bike and we took off. He wanted to know where I wanted to go. I told him I wanted to go to Los Angeles to visit Tim, Master Jeb and Master Jim.

I wanted to visit with Wes and his new Master. I don’t think Booger had heard the news that Master Earl had bought Wes! I couldn’t believe it when I heard the news. I was so happy for the both of them. Who ever arranged that pair should get a gold medal.

Walker and Xander couldn’t have been happier for Wes! They thought Master Earl was tops in their book. So he was in all our books! I once had spent an evening in his arms that summer at the ranch and knew I couldn’t spend another!

Not because he wasn’t some of the finest, most loving sex I’d ever had! I just knew myself well enough to know that I would fall head over heals in love with that Man and I had other commitments. Hell, he was almost as good looking as my Uncle Bud and in some small ways reminded me of him.

We left Glen Rose and headed west. I didn’t want to take the main highways. I wanted to travel through the back roads and small towns of Texas. I was making a photo journal of County Court Houses in Texas. All built on similar designs. A lot by the same Architect.

I wanted to take the northern route to cross into New Mexico across to Arizona. I wanted to visit Roswell. See for myself. Red was amenable to everything. He was in no hurry and just wanted to be with me.

Our first night together was not easy. He wanted to make love and I tried.
He still had it! We got into it and my Animal took over to wrestle with his Animal. When we hit together, he was so far up inside me I though he’d come out my mouth! I felt like it would rip my damn guts out through my dick. It took me ten minutes to regain my center of being.

“You know you still love me, Cowboy!”
“I never said I didn’t, Red!”
“You haven’t said it in a while.” He challenged.
“Well, if you have to hear it, I love you, Red!”

“Gee, thanks.” He said sarcastically.
“You said you’d settle for what you could get.”
“O.K.! You’re right. Let’s drop it!” I didn’t push further. I made my point.

He wanted to talk about it! Mainly he wanted to shift the guilt for his actions onto me. It was my fault that he did what he did! Not a strategy to endear a person to you.

It was my fault that he got caught with his hand in the cookie jar! If I had been a good slave and done as he ordered he would have had time to do as he wanted and I never would have been the wiser!! (Convoluted but it sounded reasonable.)

“No! No, Red! Nice try! No run around the end zone! It wasn’t my fault, Red! You had a choice, you made it! It had nothing to do with me! Any more talk like that, I will walk out again and not come back! Ever!”

“You’ve said the words, that it was your fault, you’re sorry, you were a fool, yet you have me here trying to shift your guilt onto me and think I’m fool enough to just say, ‘Oh yes, Red, you’re right it was my fault!’”

“Bull shit! You just can’t accept the fact you fucked over me and your ashamed. It’s easier to shift the guilt than it is to learn to live with it and try to do better!”

“O.K. Let’s drop it!”
“Fine with me but with your attitude it isn’t going to be easy for us to be together. I’ll ride with you and sleep with you but if you push me too far I’m gone, Red! There are several Men out there that would NEVER do that to me! I could love them easily as much as you.”

“Is that a threat!”
“Oh no, Red, it’s a promise!”

“Well, I could see to it you never leave me again!”
“Then you really don’t love me at all, Red, if you have to beat your chest and play bad ass Biker Jailer with me! Would you really want a slave that doesn’t give to you freely?”

“Besides, you’re not talking to some green Kid that’s afraid of you or death! I’ve been there and back! If you killed me, I’d be with Buck and you wouldn’t have me or anyone! I’m not afraid of dying, Red! You should know that! Besides, there’s worse things in life than dying!”

“No! I don’t suppose you are afraid of dying. But when are you gonna’ start forgiving me?”

“Probably when you start forgiving yourself, Red! I wouldn’t be here now if I hadn’t forgiven you! But you can’t shit in your bed and not expect it to stink for a while! It’s not gonna’ be the same with us as it was. I told you that when you called to the Ranch.”

“Obviously you didn’t hear me or just didn’t want to listen. I can’t be sorry for you. You did what you did and until you just let it be and try to take each day as it comes then we won’t make it together. I’m here now because of the love I HAD for you!”

“What love you get from me from now will depend on you and the amount of love you show me. So far I haven’t seen much giving on your part! Just jockeying for position and trying to make me the villain! Not a cool thing to do to someone you’re trying to impress with how much you love them!”

“Let me ask you a question, Red!”
“Shoot!”
“How can I be a Villain and a Victim at the same time?”

Red didn’t respond but just grunted.
“Well, you’re right about one thing!”He said speaking quietly. “God as my witness, Cowboy, I never thought you would get that upset over me throwing a fuck into that little trollop! However, after I saw how deeply it hurt you the guilt of what I’d done ate me up and now it’s hard for me to live with it! I swear to God, I didn’t do it with the intention of hurting you! I just didn’t think you’d care that much!”

“Well, that’s a start, Red!”

I got into bed to go to sleep. He wanted to hold me and I had no problem with that. I always enjoyed sleeping in Red’s arms. It was a restless night and I tossed and turned a lot even though I was tired. His words kept haunting me. This was NOT going to be easy!

I prayed silently. “God, you’re asking a lot of me here! How can a Man change like that over night and do something to cancel all my trust? Buck, if you’re listening ask the Big Kahuna why I have to do this, please?” For that moment my Prayer went unanswered.

I wasn’t afraid of Red physically or mentally. He was bigger than me but I could take him if I had to. My arguments frustrated him all the more because they made sense, when he knew his didn’t. I couldn’t understand why he had to have everything back the way it was and he kept pushing.

We rode together for sometime. Red wanted to fight all the time and I just wouldn’t! I’d just walk away and that would frustrate him all the more!!

His standard come back when he had lost the argument: “Well, let’s just drop it!” I would, but not before smiling sweetly to let him know that he’d lost!

He wasn’t getting things to go the way he wanted. He wanted that trust and closeness again that had been freely given but Red wasn’t willing to try to earn it back. He just felt his apology should wipe the slate and everything should be back to normal.

I felt like to give him that would mean he could do anything he wanted to me, apologize, then everything would be fine, for him! So how many apologies is one suppose to forgive? One was enough for me! Earn my trust and I’ll consider another if you fuck up again.

I wasn’t doing all the little things I use to do for him to make him feel important and just wondered how long it would be before he got tired of the status quo and jumped the fence to graze in greener pastures.

Things were getting so bad I was praying he would so I would have an excuse to cut out and go on with my life. Second times a charm for me! Fuck over me once, shame on you! Fuck over me twice, shame on me! There would be no third time!

Red surprised me! For all the back bitting bickering he wanted to do with me, he never so much as looked at another Man. I was beginning to think that he had learned his lesson. I gave in to a few perks to him as he seemed to try to be better but the constant sparing and jockeying for position wore me out emotionally.

He wanted me to play sub games with him and I went along to a point. He wanted me to pay homage to his boots like I’d done willingly before. I refused! He wanted me to call him Master. I refused! He wanted me to take his piss. I wouldn’t! He wanted me to clean his ass out! I refused! So he would overpower me, tie me up and force feed me his piss and sit on my face until I DID clean him, if he had to sit there half the night reading a book.

Well, when a hot Man has his Butt hole sitting on your mouth, what’da’ ya’ gonna’ do?? I pretended to hate it and all the while I couldn’t get my tongue up there far enough. Gracious Red would always help me by taking his fingers and spreading it open for me. It was a thoughtful gesture on his part.

I acted mad as Hell afterward but he knew I protested to much because my dick was rock hard the whole time and I shot the biggest loads I’d ever shot in our history together. I had to admit, but not to him, that it ripped me a new ass hole to have him force me to drink his piss and clean him out! Then he would rape the Holy Hell out of me which also turned me on.

I was on the verge of leaving him because of my own frustrations when he started taking me forcefully. I was hooked! I hated him for it and loved him for it! What a dichotomy!

I hated him for assuming he could just have his way with me but loved him for being powerful enough, and wanting me enough to take it away from me when my own psyche couldn’t give it to him because of my own mistrust!

I got all I needed and more yet didn’t have to give him anything in return! At least emotionally! He got what he needed too. Don’t kid yourself! Then too, I didn’t have to be untrue to my convictions of not having the same old situation we had before!

If he couldn’t have what he wanted one way from me he was going to take it and I couldn’t have been more turned on by him doing it! Is that what I secretly wanted? What was wrong with me? I didn’t see myself as a masochist. Yet, I never had more powerful sex with any man than Red when he just decided to take it!

I even found myself withholding sex and affection from him just so he would take it from me. It was in those heights of passion I would babble uncontrollably about how much I loved him and how much he meant to me. He’d managed to tapped into his own personal ‘Goldmine’ of sex and learned quickly how to push my buttons to get what he wanted.

Still, I refused to call him my Master and pay homage to his boots. Especially in front of his Biker Buddies. He would introduce me as his slave and I would embarrass him by correcting him. “I’m not your slave! I ride with you and sleep with you, THAT’S IT!!”

Our sex became more athletic in his fighting me for dominance. I never wanted to dominate Red but I wasn’t gonna’ make it easy for him to dominate me either. I never, once, felt in danger when Red bound me and forced sex on me.

After he got me bound and gaged or whatever, he was usually very considerate except when it came time to fuck me. Then he took me hard and fucked me harder so my ass would be sore for days. It felt wonderful and I couldn’t wait for the next time; however, I would never give him a hint that it turned me on that much.

Red wasn’t a dumb Man. He always fucked me until I came without manipulation of my dick. He felt that he could train me to come just by fucking me long enough and hard enough. He did! It worked!!

I recognized each time when he began fucking me to get me off , it sent me to the nether regions of reality until I felt my whole body began to shudder like my very soul was going to ejaculate through my cock.

When I reached a climax it would actually hurt physically! I’d shoot so hard and so much it would drain me of every ounce of semen. Sometime it would be so hard a shot that there would be blood mixed with the come.

The first time it scared the Hell out of Red. I assured him it was nothing to worry about. He would always unbind me, hold me in his arms like a limp dishrag and pour his love into me with kisses and apologies as to why he had to take it away from me. That too, was a major turn on and he had me where he wanted me.

It became so good I considered giving in to him and calling him my Master again. After all, we had been together at that time for almost a year and he had not looked at another Man. We had even run into T-bo and he started toward us to say ‘hello’!

I jumped up, walked purposefully toward him and decked him! Then I ran him out of camp. Told him if he tried to return or even looked at Red again I’d kill him! T-bo was afraid of me! He should have been! I meant what I said!

Red wasn’t to happy with me and yet I could tell he was proud of me for doing it! Red didn’t think I had a fighting streak in me. He was to find out otherwise. We were playing some powerful games with each other.

But I felt at this point that if I gave into him and started being his slave again and calling him my Master, he would stop taking it away from me and I wasn’t about to give that up! I was as hooked on rough sex as a drug addict to heroin!

Everyone knew what Red and I were into because we made so much damn noise. He would yell and I would holler at him calling him every name but a good one to get him mad enough to take it from me. I knew every button to push to get the reaction I wanted.

I knew exactly what I was doing! He would yell at me and call me every nasty name he could think of. Sometime we would both stop dead in the middle and start laughing our ass’s off. He’d look at me, wink and say, “Good one, Cowboy! Ooofff!! That was REALLY nasty!” Then we’d fall into each others arms laughing! Laughed until we cried.

We both knew it had become a game but it was an important game to us. Fuck the world! Hours later after we had finished and were ‘Billing’ and ‘Cooing’ with each other, everyone in camp would be literally rolling on the ground laughing their ass’s off!

Shit! We didn’t care! Fuck ‘em! They didn’t have a tenth of the passion we experienced in our love making. I have to admit my love for Red doubled from what it was but I wouldn’t make it any easier on him.

I did start taking his piss on command because I knew he would just overpower me and make me do it anyway. And I did enjoy it. Wasn’t gonna’ let him know it though.

Had the same situation happened with T-bo, now, I would have reacted completely differently. I would have yanked T-bo up by his short hairs, beat the living fuck out of him and then kicked Red’s ass up between his shoulder blades. I could have done it too!

Red was actually becoming afraid of me. He knew that even though I was smaller physically than he was, I was in better shape and much stronger. In all our games when he would overpower me, I’d push him to the limit then would feign letting him get the best of me. He instinctively knew that I could, in reality, kick his ass if I chose too!

That made the game all the sweeter for me! I wasn’t about to kill the goose that gave me the ‘golden fuck’! I may be dumb but I sure as Hell ain’t stupid!

We finally arrived in Los Angeles to visit on Mt. Washington. All the Family gathered to say ‘Hello’ and wish us well. They knew we had been through a rough patch and wanted the best for us.

Tim was a changed young Man. He was in his last month of slave training and Master Ben was allowed to visit regularly. In fact he was due in that weekend. I looked forward to seeing him again. It had been sometime. You could tell by the way that Tim talked about Master Ben he was very much in love with his soon to be Master.

Tim had actually grown in height and was becoming a wonderful slave. He was so attentive to his training Master’s and every Master that came to visit. He was on Red’s boots in a minute and Red ate it up. He thought Tim was a little bit of heaven. Master Jim had taken him to the gym regularly and he was becoming a knock out of a handsome young Man. He would make Master Ben a fine slave.

I was so thrilled to see Wes again but he didn’t seem happy. I pulled him aside to talk to him.
“Sweet Baby! We’ve been too close for you not to tell me what’s the matter! You know I ain’t gonna’ say anything! I thought you’d be happy as a clam in deep water with that handsome Man for a Master. I damn near shit my pants the first time I met him at the Yuba River outside Sacramento.”

“That’s just it, Cowboy! He bought me for a domestic slave and not for a sex partner! I take care of his house and him. Then I’m sent to my room every night alone. I get so lonely because I’ve fallen in love with him and don’t know what to do. All I want to do is serve him in every way! The only time I feel alive is when I’m in his company!”

“I know I’m not worthy to clean his boots. He is so fucking gorgeous I can’t even look at him over dinner because I’m so afraid that he’ll see the love in my eyes, that it will scare him and he’ll get rid of me!”

“You poor Baby!” I held him in my arms as he cried his heart out. “Is there anything I can do? I know him fairly well. Well enough to talk to him about it if you wish!”

“Promise me you won’t, Cowboy! I’m satisfied to be his house servant! I love him so much that even if I can’t have him that way I’m willing to be his slave just to be near him. I know that sounds sick but I’ve never felt this way about another Master. He’s so very good and kind to me that sometime he almost breaks my heart. I find myself wanting to do something bad just to have him give me the attention of punishing me. Now, how sick it that?!”

“Honey, with what I’ve gone through with Red these last few months, I’m not the one to ask that question of! We have, perhaps, the singularly most fucked up, sick relationship on record!” I laughed as he looked at me incredulously.

“I’m not kidding, Wes!” Then I told him the details and of course I made it outrageously funny to bring his spirits up. I was even laughing so hard at my own take of Red and my relationship that everyone wondered what we were talking about.

Wes had not had sex with anyone in a long time. I approached Master Earl and humbly asked his permission to take his slave off to a bedroom in Master Jeb’s house and fuck the B’Jesus out of him. Master Earl knew of Wes and my friendship and granted my request with no problem.

I had run it by Booger earlier and he didn’t seem to mind. I told him if’n he had a problem with it to let me know but not to throw it in my face later because it wouldn’t hunt. I wouldn’t do it if it was gonna’ cause problems.

He asked if he could watch? I asked Wes and surprisingly he thought Red was as sexy as I found him to be. So we ended up sandwiching Wes in between us and taking turns fucking him. He loved it. I would fuck him down the throat as Red plowed his tight little Butt. We had a wonderful afternoon and Wes went back to his Master with a smile in his heart and four loads of Man come in his gut!

That night, for some reason, I allowed Red to make normal love to me and responded like I use to with him. I couldn’t see putting our Family through one of our rough and tumble sex scenes. I found out that evening that I was falling back in love with Red, more than I wanted to.

As I went into a peaceful sleep that night Buck came to me again for a few minutes. He took me in his arms and just held me.
“Like that rough sex, don’t you Sweetheart?”
“Yes Sir!”

“Listen to you! Yes Sir! I like that! I would have made you my slave!
If for no other reason to never let you get away from a Cowboy that couldn’t do without you! You’ll be my slave over here for damn sure! I’ll never let you out of my sight!” He said laughing.

“I already know that Master!” He kissed his slave.
“You’re doing fine, Cowboy! They’re gonna’ let you know before much longer why you’re with Red! You do love him, don’t you?”
“Yes, Master!”

“It’ll get easier I promise, Cowboy! Hang in there! I’ll come to you when you need me. I’ll be by your side! I’ll hold your hand!! I love you so much, Billy!!” He started to fade......this time I let him go with a whisper.

“I love you too, Master!” I listen to hear if Red had heard me. He hadn’t.
I fell back into the deepest most peaceful sleep I had experienced in months.

End Chapter IX~
Waddie Greywolf