It was one of those winter days that seem to never quit.  The room was warm, but I had been feeding the fire since 5am and the rain.   That rain!  It has not stopped for 10 days.  It seems that it has been raining for a year.  Has it already been a year?  Maybe.

I am alone now.  I have been for the last 6 months.  It has been really interesting, this journey into my self discovery.  See I had this girlfriend.  She was from the Middle East.  She grew up surrounded in luxury and had servants all her life.  Not like a butler or maid, these servants were selected to care for the children and therefore were different than the ones that took care of the house for the adult.

No, these servants were eunuchs.  Yes they still have them, for a price.  We met through a chat room and were more than just cordial for several months.  She found out I did not particularly like being male and after some discussions, she made it known to me, that as her servant, I would never be required to become an eunuch, but if I chose this, it would most certainly raise my status with her.

She had her Alfa slave already and I was never going to be that.  I still was fascinated with the thought.  I signed up and subscribed to her web site and became a fixture in the chat room there.  I was even granted an ops standing in the room, even though I had never met her personally, though we had chatted on the phone some.

As the time passed, I could not contain myself any more.  I started saving everything.  I started stuffing money away for a trip to Thailand to the Samui clinic.  The procedure, called bilateral orchiectomy and penectomy, results in the total removal of male genitalia and the creation of an alternate urinary opening just in front of the anus.  This leaves the person completely free of genitalia and still able to urinate, though one must now sit down to pee.  Just removing the bulk of the penis would prove to be very messy when one has to void.  They require a letter from a qualified psychologist, but if you don’t happen to have one, one can be obtained upon arrival.  The fee was 115,000 Thai Baht with 3000 more for the evaluation.  There are ruffly 40 Thai baht to the dollar so I needed just under 3,000 for the surgery, evaluation and a weeks stay in their hospital.  There was also a small matter of 1850 in round trip air fare to Koh Samui, Thailand. 

(http://www.sexchangeasia.com is their website and yes it actually exists and these were their rates at the time of this writing)

After 6 months of seriously considering this as what I wanted to do, I scheduled myself off for 11 days and booked a trip.  I did not tell anyone about it and just planned on doing this as a surprise.  Then on the day I was to go, I got off work and showered there and drove to the airport.  I had already packed a small bag and managed to order the money order in advance from my bank for the amount of money left after my deposit.  

The flight took 35 hours (the ticket said 31).  There was a 7 hour layover in Hawaii, but I never got out of the terminal building.  I was tired and hungry when I met the aide at the airport who took me to the clinic.  I did just barely have time to get my clothes off and take a quick shower before the psychologist arrived.  He was a very short, thin man with large glasses.  He talked fast and I had some difficulty understanding him.  He wanted to know why I could consider removing my sexual organs without changing sex entirely, but seemed to understand that I felt I would not ever look female.  When I mentioned that I was considering becoming a servant to a woman that had plans on returning to the Middle East, either Saudi Arabia or Egypt, he seemed to perk up.  He said that they had several clients from that region.  I was amazed at how few questions he asked.  He was there for less than 10 minutes when he just got up and left.  I could see him talking to a man in a white lab coat at the desk just down from my room.  I was presuming it was the Dr. that I had yet to meet.  They spoke briefly and the Dr. with the lab coat came in.

As with the psychologist, his voice was rapid and hard to understand.  He said his name was Dr. ‘Sam’ for short and he would be performing my surgery and wanted to know when I last ate.  I told him actually it was yesterday at noon, as there was a problem with meals on the flight and I did not care for the snacks and alcohol on the planes makes me nauseous.  I had had some seven up, which he said was fine.

He told me that his afternoon case had canceled and he could have me in surgery in one hour. With that he was gone.  A very young looking RN came in and shaved my privates and started an IV in my hand.  It was probably less than 20 minutes until they had  a gurney in to take me to surgery.  I was really not prepared for this and was looking forward to some relaxation and contemplation but before I even got comfortable in my room, I was on my way to surgery.  I was just about to get out of the gurney when someone behind a mask was looking down at me.  That person placed a hair net over my hair and ears and put a syringe of stuff in this port on the IV in my hand.  It burned a little and a soft, almost feminine voice said “just relax, in a minute we will explain what we are going to do, but for now, just relax”.  Well I was feeling really calm and almost like I could go to sleep.  The lights in here were really bright and there seemed to be some chaos with people moving around and lots of noises.  Then a gentle pair of hands were placed on my ears and straightened out my head.  The soft, very feminine voice said “there, we are all finished now.  You can wake up”. 

“Wake up”?

“All finished”?

I did not know I was even asleep and if they were finished, did that mean ……

Then Dr ‘Sam’ took off his mask and looked down at me.  “We are all done.  You have no more manhood.  Manhood all gone”

Well if I wanted to or not, it was done.  I was no longer a man and I would never be again.  I was wheeled into my room and returned to my bed.  As soon as no one was looking I slid my hand under the gown and to the place where my penis once was, only to find a bandage covered in white paper tape.  Down towards the anus, there was a hose that connected my bladder to a bag that now collected urine.

After a day of bed rest, they let me get up and walk a bit.  I was curious, so I went into the bathroom and raised my gown.  My knees wobbled but I was able to catch myself.  There I was, without the things I hated. 

The thing that I found the most interesting the next several days is how not shocked any of the staff was.  If I were in the states, I bet all of the nurses would have made some sort of a deal over the lack of genitalia I now had but none of them seemed to be the slightest bit surprised.  I mean this clinic specializes in sex changes so I guess seeing a guy leave as a girl is an every day occurrence but you still feel a bit slighted.

After my week there, I flew directly to the Midwest to meet my Mistress.  I had not told her about my surprise and thought I would really floor her.  We met at the air port and she told me how I was special and that every one of her slaves just seemed not to get it.  She was the Mistress, they were slaves, but each still was doing everything they could to get into her pants.  I promised her I would never do that.  She almost called me a liar and said men had no choice but to follow their dicks. 

I smiled.

She looked at me with that ‘What?’ look

And I said, “but Mistress, I am not a man”

“What?” she said

“Remember when You told me You really did not trust men?  Well I thought I would surprise You so I went to Thailand last week and got that taken care of”

“WHAT?” she said

“Ma’am, I am now Your eunuch.  I thought it would be special this way.  That way You would not ask me to do this for You, since it is so irreversible.  I did it all on my own”

“Well, why did you damage MY property without MY permission”

“I thought You wanted this”

“Well I do, but it should be MY decision”.  With that she got up and left.  I have never seen her since.

I wonder if it is ever going to stop raining.