I walked to the end of the block and crossed over to the alley that ran between each row of houses. Few blocks had alleys back home, but it seemed like every block here was split by an alley. When I came to Joshua’s house, I saw that a light was on in the back.

A window was open; the blinds were up; Joshua was sitting on a bed; he was naked. His eyes were closed; his legs were crossed in front of him. I guessed he was meditating, praying, or something like it.

I stood off to the side, in the dark, out of the light streaming from the window. I doubted he could have seen me, even if his eyes had been open.

Fuck, he was hot. I was hard again. Shit! I didn’t know whether it meant I was gay, being turned on by a nullo; but he damn sure turned me on. He didn’t have any business being so fucking beautiful. I’ve seen pretty boys, but Joshua was fucking beautiful.

He had blond hair. It was short but not real short, not cut short on the sides, the hair on the sides about as long as the hair on top, his hair forming a golden halo around his head.

He sat very still, relaxed, hardly breathing. Before I realized it, my dick was in my hand, and I was pumping it. God! I wanted him.

I came, a moan escaping my clenched teeth. His eyes opened. “Come around to the back door,” he said. “I’ll let you in.”

Did he know it was me? Was he expecting me? The note had said, “Come after dark,” but it hadn’t necessarily meant tonight.

“It’s me,” I said.

“I know,” he answered. “I was waiting for you. Come around to the back door.”

I stuck my dick back in my pants and walked to the back door. It opened. Joshua was still naked. I had expected him to throw on a pair of shorts or something. He tossed his head, gesturing for me to come in. I followed him to his room. He sat back down on his bed, patting the area beside him. I sat down next to him.

“Why did you come?” he asked.

“Dad’s gonna take me to have my nuts cut off tomorrow,” I said. “He’s having his cut off, too.”

“You’re going to have more than your testicles cut off,” said Joshua. “They plan to nullify you tomorrow.”

“Dad said we were going to another town to have it done; he promised the doc would only cut off my nuts.”

“It doesn’t matter what town you go to,” said Joshua. “You go to any doctor in the state and he’ll nullify you. No doctor cuts off a boy’s testicles and leaves his penis. I doubt there’s a boy in the state that has a penis – except for you and maybe some other kid that’s just moved here.”

“Are you telling me that everyone belongs to your church?”

“No,” he said, “you don’t belong to it – not yet, anyway – and you’re getting nullified, and it only took a day for your dad to agree to it. He’ll join the church – you’ll join the church – eventually. If he wants to keep his job, he’ll have to, and do you think you’ll have any choice in the matter? You can’t live in this state and not belong to it.”

“But you don’t believe,” I said.

“That’s not quite right,” he said. “I believe in the church’s doctrine; I believe in the end of times; I just don’t believe that Reverend Gillis is the Redeemer. He’s no more the Redeemer than you are. He still has his penis and testicles. He’s as tied to this world as you are.”

“What’s wrong with having a dick?” I asked. “What’s wrong with having balls? If there’s a god, that’s how he made me. You guys are the freaks.”

As much as I liked him, I was pissed. Ever since I hit this town, everyone wanted to cut off my dick; they wanted to cut off my balls. How fucked was that?

“No,” he said, “we’re not freaks. We’ve been cleansed; we’ve been purified. Only those that have been are ready for the Rapture.”

"Shit! Don't give me that," I said, "You wish you had a dick. You jacked me off. Why would you do that, if you weren't turned on by me?"

"I'm curious about you," he said, "about you and about other intact boys. I need to know why sex is so important to you; I need to know why your genitals are so important to you."

"At least, I can pee standing up," I said.

"So can I. "You want to see?" When I nodded, he said, "Come into the bathroom." I followed him to it.

Raising the toilet lid, he stood close to the bowl, and placed a finger - his index and middle fingers - on each side of his pee hole. Letting loose a stream of pee, he directed it into the toilet bowl. A little splattered on the floor at the end but no more than I usually got on the floor. Dad's always bitching at me for not wiping my pee off the floor. Joshua wiped his up with a piece of toilet paper.

"Can you do any better?" he asked.

"Yeah," I said.

"Let's see," he said.

"I - I can't right now," I said.

"Why not?"

"I got a hard-on." I'd got hard watching him pee.

"Again? You just masturbated outside my window. How many times have you masturbated today?"

"How did you know I jacked off?" I asked, embarrassed that he knew - that he knew I jacked off in the dark watching him though the window.

He shrugged. "Little things," he said. "You moaned; the way you breathed; I could smell it. Why do I turn you on so much?"

"Shit! I don't know," I said. "You're pretty - like a girl is pretty - but you're a boy; or you were once a boy. Fuck! I even got turned on thinking about how I might have my nuts cut off tomorrow." I shrugged. "Fuck! I don't know why it turns me on. It just does. You do. You turn me on. I don't know why; you just do."

"You see," he said. "You'll never be ready for the Rapture, until you've been nullified - purified. As long as you have genitals, you're part of Earth. You're tied to the physical plane, just like Gillis is - like all the boys with testicles are."

"I came over here hoping you'd somehow help me get out of having my nuts cut off, but you want me nullified."

Shit! I didn't see any way out of this fucking mess. If I went home, I was getting nutted - or worse, if what Joshua said was true - and here, Joshua was telling me that to save my soul - or some shit like that - I had to be nullified.

"I'll help you," said Joshua.

"I thought you want me to get nullified," I said.

"I do, but I want you to choose it; and I don't want you nullified yet. I need to learn more about what drives an intact boy. You're the first one I've ever known. I need to know more about you and others like you."

"Why?" I asked.

"So I can convince you that you don't need genitals; so that I can convince you that they just get in the way."

"In the way of what?"

"In the way of salvation," he said.

"I ain't never gonna want my nuts and dick cut off," I said.

"Never is a long time," he said. "I can wait. You will one day."

"Bull shit," I said. He just grinned. "How are you gonna help me? You gonna let me stay here?"

"Tonight, you can," he said. "I'll find some other place for you tomorrow; besides, we're leaving."

"We're leaving? Where are we going?" I asked.

"California."