We, sixteen of us, left for California a couple weeks later travelling in two motor homes. Joseph and Simon, another adult nullo, drove. By that time, I had seen Joseph naked, and he was a nullo, although one nullified after puberty. A thick bush of pubic hair covered his crotch, and he shaved his chin and upper lip.

All the rest - all nullos except for me - were my age or a year or two younger. I supposed they were all half brothers of Joshua, but I wasn't certain. His "brotherhood," I learned, consisted of others that weren't fathered by Gillis.

I rode in the lead motor home along with Joshua, the one driven by Joseph. Peter, Joshua's second in command, rode in the second, driven by Simon.

Although Joseph and Simon were adults, Joshua and Peter were obviously in charge. Everywhere we went - every time we stopped - Joshua was treated like he was something special. Grown men - if nullos were still men - kissed his hand and seemed to cherish his every word. I'd never seen adults treat any kid like they did him.

Although I wasn't ready - by a long shot - to be nullified, it was tough being the only one on the trip with a dick. The others went naked much of the time. "Purified by God's holy knife, our bodies are perfect," Joshua said. "Why should we hide them?"

After James's reaction to my dick, Joshua hadn't made me show it to the others. Instead, he'd taken pictures of me naked, and showed them the pictures. Still, viewing them caused Andrew and Matthew to run for the toilet, and the rest looked a little green around the gills after seeing them. I imagine, had I shown them my hard dick, we would have been knee deep in puke.

So, I wore baggy pants, while the rest lounged around the motor home naked. Looking at them, I was hard and horny all the time, and I couldn't jack off, except at night. With nine of us in the motor home, privacy didn't exist. I could be in the bathroom taking a shit, and someone would walk in on me.

Of course, I had to keep a towel on my lap, so one of them wouldn't see my dick and throw up.

A small table and benches on one side of the motor home converted to a bed, and I slept in it by myself. Joshua had a bed to himself, and none of the others would sleep with me. I think they were afraid I'd try to fuck them - or something.

Maybe they were right; maybe I would have. God! They were hot. Several of them, like Joshua, had small triangles of pubic hair, more like a girl's pubic hair, I guess, not like mine, which was smeared across my groin. Each one of them - except for Peter, who, a little fat, was bigger than me - would have made a decent looking girl.

It just wasn't natural for boys to be so pretty.

I guess my favorite - other than Joshua - was Andrew. He had brown, curly, hair that fit his head like a cap and a small triangle of brown pubic hair, which hid any scar he might have; although, since he was nullified soon after he was born, he probably didn't have much of a scar. He was pretty - almost as pretty as Joshua; and he talked to me. Many of the others pretty much ignored me or looked at me like I was some kind of a freak.

Sometimes, I felt like a fucking freak, like having a dick and balls made me a freak. During the whole trip, I never talked to a normal boy - one like me with genitals.

I heard before we left that my dad had been nullified, so if I hadn't run away, I would have been, too. I missed him.

Sometimes, I wished I'd stayed and been nullified. It wasn't so much fun having a dick and balls, when everyone thought you were a freak for having them, and when you couldn't jack off, except at night, especially when you were surrounded by a bunch of naked nullos that swished their twats in your face all day long.

But they thought nothing of it; they never got horny; they never thought about sex; and I guess, they forgot that I did.

Fuck! With them around, it was all I thought about.

I was queer for Andrew - if wanting to have sex with a nullo made you queer. I loved Joshua, but everyone loved Joshua, and I no longer thought of him as a sex object. Somehow, that would have been sacrilegious, even for me.

Andrew though; fuck, the kid was hot; and he didn't even know it. The kid had never thought about sex in his life. He didn't know how much he turned me on.

It was obvious that the trip to California would take a while. We stopped so often. Of course, every town had a Holy Nutters church, but we never went to any of the churches, instead meeting outdoors at campgrounds or on a member's farm either in a field or in a barn. I soon found out why Joshua wanted me along and why he didn't want me nullified yet.

"Sex," he said at a meeting, "is why the End of Times has been delayed for 2000 years. John preached that there was no need to marry and beget children, but although he was nullified, he didn't push others into it, fearing if he preached it, people wouldn't choose to believe.”

“”John’s faith wasn’t sufficient; and the End of Times was put off until now.”

“Peter, also nullified, started the first church, but his successors, although they preached chastity, didn’t practice it. Early popes fathered children, and as we know, today, some priests of the Catholic Church have sex with boys. Man, as long as he has genitals, is a slave to them.”

“Their faith wasn’t sufficient; and the End of Times was put off, until now.”

“We come to today: the man we call Father, some of us because we carry his DNA, all of us because he started our church, also lacks sufficient faith. He has kept his genitals; he continues to have sex; he continues to father children. If he truly believed in the End of Times – if he were God, as he claims – he would have been nullified, as have been all of us. God has no need of genitals. None of his angels have them.”

“His son doesn’t.”

He held his arms out from his side, his palms out, his head bowed. I didn’t know whether in prayer or whether he was looking at his own smooth crotch. Was he saying he was the Son of God? Everyone certainly treated him like he was.

“As you know,” he continued, “our church elders and their sons, although they no longer have penises, have testicles, and continue to beget children. They are all heretics, as is Reverend Gillis, the founder of our church.”

“God chose him, but his hubris allowed him to think he could keep his genitals and beget children, while preaching that others must give up theirs.”

“His faith was not sufficient. He failed God, as he has failed our church.”

“It is up to us to purify the church, this time, with God’s holy fire. It must be cleansed of heretics; it must be cleansed of those that have chosen to keep their genitals.”

“Some of you will give your lives in God’s holy war, but those that do, will have a place in Heaven, seated at God’s right hand. You will be honored above all others. Give up your lives joyously. The world ends soon. Secure your place in Heaven.”

That’s when he brought me onstage. “This boy,” he said, introducing me, “still has his genitals.” The crowd murmured. I could see the shock on their faces.

Hell, I was the only guy in there with clothes on. A few women were dressed, but no guy was; and the women and girls that were naked had no tits. They’d had mastectomies – I think that’s the right word for it.

I thought for a moment he would have me pull down my pants, but he didn’t. I guess he was afraid it would evoke mass puking.

“All he thinks about is sex. He even wanted to have sex with me.”

A roar from the crowd erupted. If I hadn’t been on stage with Joshua, under his obvious protection, I think they would have torn me apart. I was scared shitless.

It sure as shit cured me of my hard-on. That sucker wilted, and my balls withdrew into my crotch. I wanted to hide behind Joshua; I wanted to ask him to nullify me.

“He came to us from California, that cesspool of sexuality,” he added. “We go there to spread the Word. We will use their media, Hollywood and the Internet, to offer them salvation, to tell them of the End of Times. Only though the rejection of sexuality, only through nullification, can they be saved. There will be no place in Heaven for those that choose to keep their genitals.”

“This boy,” he said, turning his head toward me, “even though he travels with me, even though he professes to love me, still masturbates. He can’t go a day without doing it.”

Again, the crowd expresses shock and outrage. Again, I cringed.

“It’s not his fault,” Joshua said, quieting them. "It’s because he has genitals. As long as he does, he will be slave to them.”

“Remove them,” someone in the crowd shouted.”

“Nullify him,” another cried.

“Yes,” I said, the words escaping, before I had the chance to think, “nullify me.”

“No,” said Joshua. “It would be done for the wrong reason. You’re still an unbeliever. When you believe…that’s when you’ll be nullified.” He turned back to the crowd. “One day, he will believe. One day, he will serve me as a brother. One day, he will be nullified. Until then, he is under my protection. Let no one harm him.”

It was a fucking relief to hear him say that. I promised myself that I was through with sex; I’d never jack off again.

Of course, that was a promise I wouldn’t keep.