In 1907, archaeologist Hobart Carver discoverd the mastaba tomb of an obscure king of Upper Egypt named Mesedsu Re. Mesedsu Re's obscurity was well-deserved judging from the list of his exploits on the side of his mummy case. Most of them involved minor border skirmishes and suppression of minor local insurrections.

There was, however, one curious entry : "Having passed the prime of his youth without issue, King Mesedsu Re sought the aid of the god, Min, and in the 27 years remaining to him, begat 83 sons." Though such inscriptions are commonly exaggerated, it would be hard to exaggerate this claim without being absurd.

Carver duly reported the find with an inventory of artefacts found with the mummy and in the mastaba, with the notable omission of one artefact at the insistence of his sponsor, Lord Carneghan, who regarded its publication to be highly indecorous.

Hobart Carver did, however, describe this item in his diary which went undiscovered for nearly a century. "Although the mummy itself, owing to desiccation by the desert air was in a fine state of preservation, the wrappings were crumbling. Upon consultation with Lord Carneghan, it was decided to unwrap the mummy, retrieve such amulets and other artefacts which might have been included in the wrappings, and describe and publish them.

One artefact, however, so offended Lord Carneghan that he insisted that it NOT be published. Between the thighs of the mummy I found a large gold ring, about the size of a napkin ring, 1.125 inches in minimum inside diameter, 1.375 inches in outside diameter, elliptical in cross-section 0.25 X 0.375 inches, the long axis being, of course, tranverse to the plane of the ring.

'What on Earth ?' exclaimed Lord Carneghan when I shewed it to him. 'It's much too large for a thumb ring or even a toe ring. Where could it be worn ?' Somewhat embarrassed, I replied 'The only place which I can imagine, your Lordship, is about the virile member, perhaps to constrict the veins and thus maintain erection. Considering where it was found, this would be a reasonable explanation, especially in the light of the inscription which it bears.'

'Inscription ?' asked Lord Carneghan. 'It is faint but legible, and, if I read it correctly, this is what it says', I replied. 'Thus saith Min, While he remains a man, only death can quench the wearer's lust.' 'Bearing in mind that he begat 83 sons in 27 years, it would appear that the inscription is no lie.'

Lord Carneghan's face had turned an apoplectic purple. 'I FORBID you to describe or publish this vile thing ! It must be destroyed. ' I answered immediately, 'NO ! I am an archaeologist. I cannot destroy an ancient artefact. I cannot bring myself to do so.' Lord Carneghan glared at me and then said 'Very well, then, add it to your private collection of rejected and de-accessioned artefacts, but you must promise me never to publish a single word about this ring.'

I assured Lord Carneghan that 'Upon my word of honour as a gentleman, I will never publish a word about this artefact. ' This satisfied him and we let the matter rest at that."

Hobart Carver was to keep that promise for the rest of his life. Though Lord Carneghan died of septicæmia from an infected cut in 1925, Carver did not feel released from his promise and kept mum about the Ring of Min until his own death at the age of 80 in 1957. Hobart Carver had never married and so, left his collection of rejected and de-accessioned artefacts and all 55 volumes of his mostly tedious and turgid diary to the Brasfield Museum, where they remained undisturbed until the millennium year of 2000.

In the millennium year, the trustees of the Brasfield Museum decided that the museum ought to put on a special exhibition illustrating the development of certain aspects of human endeavour, art, craftsmanship, and technology throughout the past millennia, with special emphasis on the past 1000 years.

Organising the materials for this exhibit became the responsibility of the Assistant Curator of Antiqities, Dr. Parsifal Galahad Pinckney, who preferred to be called Galahad . Dr. Pinckney was an unabashed "out" gay, a 29 year old "bottom" who disliked women intensely.

It was into his hands that the Ring of Min fell next. The note which accompanied it in the cedar-wood box in which Dr. Carver had always kept it was tantalisingly laconic. It read "This ring, consecrated to the God, Min, was found between the thighs of the mummy of King Mesedsu Re who, though infertile before he acquired it, fathered 83 sons in 27 years afterward. (See entry for August 18, 1907, in volume 5 of my diary.)"

"Wot the bloody 'ell ?" exclaimed Dr. Pinckney whose speech reverted to its lower-class origins when he was excited. "Why, it's a cock-ring." Intrigued by the discovery, Galahad dug out volume 5 of Dr. Carver's diary and read the account under August 18, 1907 of the discovery of the Ring of Min, the translation of its inscription, and Lord Carneghan's reaction to it.

Placing the ring under a binocular microscope, Galahad Pinckney read the inscription for himself. Though purged of Carver's self-conscious archaism, his translation was essentially the same. It wasn't exactly a curse, but rather, more of an admonition. Though the ring appeared much too large for his own 5" penis, Galahad couldn't resist the temptation to try it on.

Chuckling, he dropped the ring into his pocket and visited the Gentlemen's loo as he did two or three times a day to masturbate anyhow. Galahad dropped his trousers and his briefs and slid the ring onto his penis which immediately erected so that the ring fitted snugly. As soon as it reached the bottom, his mind was flooded with vivid and unwelcome images of WOMEN ! Tits and twats danced before his eyes and he suddenly felt almost unbearably horny....but for WOMEN ???

In a panic, he clutched at the ring and tried to pull it off his rigid penis. It wouldn't budge, not even a "silly little millimetre." Pulling hard on it had about the same effect as trying to tear his penis out by the roots. The damned thing WOULD NOT come off and he was trembling with lust for women. It was as if the ring had become adherent to the skin and the skin adherent to the membranes beneath it.

Though he hated to destroy a rare and valuable Egyptian artefact, it seemed to Galahad that the only way he could get that damned thing off his prick was to cut it off. Holding his achingly-hard boner against his belly, Galahad pulled up his briefs and his trousers , left the loo and headed for the workshop where there would be a bolt cutter. He put the jaws of the bolt cutter around the ring and began to close the handles. However, as soon as he did so, it felt as if the ring had become white hot .

Galahad nearly screamed as he opened the jaws of the bolt cutter, whereupon the pain instantly ceased. Seizing a triangular file, he tried desperately to cut into the ring with it. The result was the same: instant excruciating pain. The damned ring DIDN'T WANT to be removed !

With a boner as hard as a pinch bar standing up inside his briefs and undershirt, Galahad returned to his office and re-read the inscription. "While he remains a man, only death can quench the wearer's lust." Well, that was clear enough. All he had to do to get the damned thing off was to castrate himself . How nice !

Min, of course, was the god of male fertility and sexual prowess, always depicted as ithyphallic [with an erection] and usually, apparently masturbating, his rigid shaft held tightly at the base in his left hand. But, he was a god of procreation and, therefore, directed toward heterosexual activity. So, the Ring of Min made men heterosexually horny, just what Galahad didn't want at all.

Days became weeks and weeks months and Galahad's erection never relaxed for an instant. He had read that one must never wear a metal penis ring for more than 20 minutes and that, if an erection were prolonged more than about four hours, the corpora cavernosa would degenerate and the man would be impotent once the erection subsided.

This didn't bother Galahad half as much, though, as the fact that he longed to be buggered by a man and, at the same time, burned with an uncharacteristic lust to screw women. He finally gave in to the latter passion and visited a brothel.

He chose the girl he found least repulsive and mounted her. He had no problem in performing the act, His perpetual erection made that easy. However, pump and thrust as he would, he COULD NOT COME. He could NOT achieve an orgasm with a woman. Finally he faked it. He was wearing a condom, so she couldn't tell if he really came or not. He thrusted very hard and gave four deep masculine grunts of simulated satisfaction.

That, he realised, had been a waste of time and £50. When he got home, he had to masturbate to get any real satisfaction. He masturbated at the museum these days about three times as often as before. six times as compared to two. He had to. Min was constantly egging him on to approach women and, if they were indifferent, to rape them.

Min's heterosexual urgings were also interfering with his gay sex life. He could get a fine orgasm from being buggered, as he always had, but his mind was constantly confused by fantasies of fucking women at the same time. He finally decided "THIS SHIT HAS GOT TO STOP !!!"

Only two things could stop it, however: castration or death. Galahad could see no reason why a catamite should fear castration. He never used his penis except to masturbate, anyhow. He had read that eunuchs still enjoyed submitting to buggery and that in Asia it was called "the eunuch's delight."

Having decided to castrate himself, Galahad planned it carefully. He decided to tie off his scrotum and spermatic cords with a stout braided nylon cord, similar to fishing line but heavier, under very high tension, and then cut off his scrotum and testicles with a cutthroat razor. He discussed this plan with his friend, Reggie, who was a medical technician.

Reggie could obtain lidocaine and hypodermic syringes and would supervise the operation which Galahad planned to perform in the attic of the museum. There was a steel beam to which he could attach the cord by means of an eyebolt. To the other end, he would attach a weight-holder on which he could pile 10 10-kg. weights, enough to pull the cord VERY tight without breaking it , its tensile strength being 240 lbs. or about 110 kg.

Galahad looped the cord about his scrotum in a double overhand knot, half of a surgeon's knot. Reggie washed off his scrotum with alcohol and injected lidocaine, first into the scrotum and then, after it had become numb, into the spermatic cords.

Then Galahad fastened one end of the nylon cord to the ring bolt and the other to the weight-holder. Reggie piled the 10 kg. weights on the weight-holder until the nylon cord was as tight as it could be.

The weights were removed and the ends of the cord were reversed and another double overhand knot tied, completing a surgeon's knot. Again the ends of the cord were fastened to the ringbolt and the weight-holder and the 10 kg. weights piled on it. The surgeon's knot was now as tight as it could be got. Galahad now disinfected the blade of the razor with phenol from the chemical laboratory downstairs and slashed off his testicles and scrotum. Instantly, his erection relaxed forever and the Ring of Min slipped off it into the bucket which Reggie was holding to catch Galahad's testicles.

Galahad pocketed the ring and helped Reggie remove the weights from the holder. The knot did not loosen, but, to be sure, after the ends were trimmed, Galahad glued them in place with cyanoacrylate glue. He had decided that the Ring of Min was too dangerous to be allowed to exist in this world. Unlike Sauron's One Ring, it would not have to be dropped into a volcano to destroy it, however.

Galahad had obtained the recipe for aqua regia, the only solvent for gold, from the Internet and procured the ingredients, nitric and hydrochloric acids from the Museum's chemical laboratory. He combined the acids in the proper proportion in a beaker under a chemical fume hood and, slipping the Ring of Min onto a glass rod, gently slid it into the fuming mixture, and closed the hood. It dissolved slowly, but there was enough aqua regia. Thus ended Min's power over men on Earth.