Tim's Last Orgasm 29: Adjusting To New Lives

Jared had arranged for his dad’s limo to pick up everyone at the airport, so everyone was driven directly to their own homes. “You comin’ over to my place?” Nate asked Tim as they settled themselves in the comfort of the big black car. It was Saturday afternoon, and everyone had school on Monday.

“I doubt it tonight,” Tim replied. “I know my parents will want Terry and me to stick close to home our first night back, and I can’t wait to see how much Little Timmy has grown. Why don’t you and your mom come over?”
“Mom prob’ly won’t want to,” Nate answered. Tim couldn’t possibly have known, but he had just hurt the young teen badly. In Nate’s mind Tim didn’t want to spend the evening with him, so he had no intention of asking his mom to go anywhere. In Nate’s very active imagination he had just been rejected by his lover, pushed aside for a little baby and perhaps... maybe even the baby’s father. After all, Tim had made no secret of the fact that he and Larry went back more years than Nate could even remember. And Larry, as far as anyone knew, still had all his body parts. Maybe Tim had designs on his long time best friend. If so, what better way to get to him than through his son?

When the big black limo pulled up in front of the Seymore home, Valerie appeared as if from nowhere. “There’s mom,” Nate said. “Bye, everyone.” Tim leaned over to kiss him, but Nate ignored the advance and got out of the car. “See ya tomorrow?” Tim said hopefully.
“I dunno, Tim,” Nate answered. “I know Mom will want us to go to church, an’ after that we’ll probably go out to eat...”
“So call me when you’re through, ok?” Tim suggested. Nate didn’t answer. Don handed him his bag from the trunk and he waved as he ran up the driveway and into his mother’s arms.

Laura sat in the back of the limo and watched the exchange, or lack of it, between Tim and Nathan. She took particular notice that Nathan had avoided Tim’s very obvious effort to kiss his lover, and she wondered. Of course she had no idea what had gone on between them on the plane, but it seemed to her, for whatever reason, things were not well between Tim and his young lover. She thought of saying something to Tim, but she had no idea what to say, so she said nothing. But minutes later it was her turn to say good-bye when the limo slid to the curb in front of her house. She made a point of kissing Terry warmly, telling him she’d be over Sunday afternoon.

“You wanna come to our house tomorrow afternoon?” Tim offered to Jared when they were at his house. “If I know my mom, we’ll be having a big old fashioned Sunday dinner.”
“If you’re sure it’d be ok, I’d love to,” Jared responded. “I’ll have to see what my dad is up to, but I’m sure it’ll be fine. I’ll call, ok?” And then Tim and Terry found themselves standing on the sidewalk, waiting for Don to dig their luggage out of the trunk. “Thank you so much for being Jared’s friend,” the chauffeur said as he handed the boys their bags. “He’s never had a real friend before, and now he’s got four. It makes me feel good to see him so happy.”

Tim and Terry walked up the driveway as their parents came out to meet them. There were hugs all around, and then the homecoming was interrupted by a baby’s crying inside the house. “I’m sorry, I’ve got to go see to Timmy,” Virginia said as she turned to go in the house. “He’s been out of sorts ever since you boys left.”
“Let me, Mom,” Tim offered. His mother, obviously tired from dealing with a crying baby for two weeks, was only too pleased to allow her son to deal with the problem. Tim walked into the house and followed to sound of the baby to the living room, where Timmy was in his bassinet. He bent over to pick up the screaming child, who stopped crying as soon as Tim had him in his arms.

“Tim!” Virginia exclaimed, “what on earth did you do to that baby?”
“Nothing, Mom,” Tim replied. “I just picked him up, that’s all.”
“Tim, he’s been crying non stop for two weeks! I thought he had colic or something.”
“He seems fine to me,” Tim answered as he looked at the tiny face smiling back at him. “Maybe you just don’t know how to hold a baby, Mom,” he added with a grin.
“Fine with me,” his mom said. “You can just take care of him yourself from now on.”

Tim had never felt anything like the sensation that was now coursing through his body. The little boy had snuggled into him and put a contented look on his face, and was now sucking greedily on the bottle that Tim had presented. He thought of Larry, somewhere on an Aircraft Carrier, and he wondered if his friend had any idea what he was missing. I doubt it, he said to himself. If he had any idea how special it makes a guy feel, holding this little one, all the ships in the US fleet wouldn’t be able to keep him from coming home. And then he had another thought. His entire body shuddered slightly as he thought of the day when Larry would come home and take his son with him. As much as he loved Larry, he found himself wishing that day would never come.

Terry went directly to his room as soon as they were in the house, pleasantries exchanged, his mother assured that he and his brother were well, had enjoyed their trip but were still glad to be home. He had to do some rearranging of his room so he’d have a secure hiding place for the new type of underwear that was now part of his life. He would keep most of his supply in the trunk of Tim’s car, but he would have to have a few pair in his room for emergencies, to say nothing of a safe place to keep the used ones until he could smuggle them out of the house. He had accepted what was now a part of his life; he still didn’t like it much, but for now all he could do was to make it work for him.

********************

“Did you meet anyone in Cancun?” Don asked as they drove home. “Anyone special, I mean?”
“You know better than that,” Jared said flatly. “I wasn’t trying to meet anyone. I just wanted to get away with my friends and have a good time, and that’s exactly what I did.
“I know what your objectives were,” Don returned. “I also know that sooner or later you’ll meet someone who will change your attitude. We all do, sooner or later.”
“Whatever you say, Don,” Jared said, giving the chauffeur a very clear signal that he didn’t want to discuss it. “How are things at home?” he asked.

Don told his young passenger that his father had been away for most of the two weeks that Jared was away, but had made a special point of being home today to see him. “I know you’ll never believe me, but he was worried about you, Jared. He’s home right now, preparing one of his gourmet meals for you.”
“Dad is cooking?” Jared questioned. “I didn’t think he could even boil water without burning it.”
“Your father is a good cook,” Don told him. “Before you were born, it was his hobby. But since your mother left...” A stricken look came on Don’s face. He had been under strict orders never to mention Jared’s mother, under any circumstances.

“It’s ok, Don, I’m not gonna tell Father you mentioned my mom. I’m not a kid any more, and I can handle it.”
“You really ought to treat your father better, you know,” Don lectured. “He is trying really hard to love you, but you don’t make it easy.”
“I know, Don,” Jared replied. “I just keep thinking of all those years when all he was to me was the man who owned all the luxury I was living in. I’m trying, and I know he is too.”
“I don’t think you do know,” Don said. He had never in his life spoken to his lifelong employer, or his son like this, but Don had come to care deeply for them both and he was determined to make old wrongs right, even at the expense of his job. “Did you know, for example, that when I first met your father he didn’t even have enough money to pay his first month’s rent on an apartment he wanted?”
“Actually, I didn’t,” Jared said with surprise. “I just assumed that he was always rich.”

Don the chauffeur didn’t say anything for a few moments. In his mind he was back almost thirty years ago, to the hard times, to when things weren’t nearly as comfortable as they were now. Finally he decided it was time that Jared knew it all. “Your grandfather had made it on his own,” he said. “But he thought your father would only squander all that he had made, so he left it all to you. Your father was penniless, Jared! He had a few connections thanks to his father, but he had no money at all! I was working for your grandfather then, actually not that much older than you are now. When your dad left home, I went with him, not because anyone told me to, and not because I saw a better opportunity, but because I believed in him. I knew that he would do just fine, if only someone would give him a chance.

“We shared a room, your father and I, while he finished college. His father had given him enough money to get through college, but he had also predicted that your dad would squander it all and have nothing. Well, he didn’t. He got his degree in business, and then he went on and got his graduate degree. Still his father didn’t believe in him, so he went off on his own and built the empire that you’re going to inherit without lifting a finger. And all the time he was building it, all those years that you resent because you never went fishing with our father, you didn’t have a mother, you had no one watching your ball games and going with you to your Scout meetings, your father was out killing himself so that you would never have to. He might have been right and he might have been wrong, but believe me, Jared, everything your father has done in his life has been for you!”

Jared contemplated what he’d been told, but he didn’t reply. Don knew he’d overstepped his position by a mile, but he also knew that he and Jared were good enough friends that he could do those things and Jared wouldn’t say anything. What he didn’t know was that his comments had just served to annoy his young friend even more. He was annoyed that his father hadn’t chosen to tell him these things himself; he was properly pissed off that his dad hadn’t asked him or bothered to inquire what Jared would like. He decided to ignore the whole incident and center his mind on more important things; so he settled back in the posh limo, then slid his hand down the front of his shorts and fondled his totally smooth, vacant crotch.

The pain was almost totally gone now and the hair was starting to grow back. Jared loved the feel of it: so smooth, so graceful, so neutral! This was what he’d been wanting ever since puberty! Still, he had very fond memories of the night before his surgery, when he and Carlos had made love. He wished he could do it again, but of course that was impossible now. He knew, based on what the doctor had told him, that he could expect the hot flashes to begin any time now, and he wasn’t looking forward to that.

*************************

Valerie Seymore went wandering into Nate’s bedroom as he was unpacking. She was a little troubled by his mood. It wasn’t like he was grumpy, but he wasn’t his cheerful self either. He seemed almost like... like he’d been when he was 12, before he joined the Scout troop and met Tim. He had evaded her rather oblique questions, saying only that they had all had a good time in Cancun. He had bought her two beautiful necklaces and several souvenirs which he gave her as soon as he’d popped open a can of coke, but there was very little more information forthcoming. “So, I’ve got to know, Nate, did you do it?” she asked.
“Uh-huh,” Nate replied, then went on with his unpacking.
“Would you think it a little too kinky if I asked you to show your mom?” she said tentatively.

Nate looked at his mother sharply, then shrugged. He didn’t say anything, but he hooked his thumbs under his shorts and his boxers, then pushed them down to his ankles in one unit. As his clothes descended he felt his face flush brightly, his phantom erection grow the the point of pain. “My goodness,” Valerie exclaimed, “he didn’t leave you anything at all!”
“No, Ma’am,” Nate replied. “He said he had to go inside ‘cause there was as much you don’t see as there is that you do see. You like it?”
“I don’t think it’s that important whether I like it or not,” Valerie replied. “The important thing is, do you like it?” In her mind’s eye she was looking at a small boy, perhaps 5 or 6 years old, as she bathed him. That had been the last time she’d seen his penis, but she remembered it vividly and how beautiful it had been. It was perfectly formed, symmetrical and proportional. Now she was regretting not having seen it after it had matured. She wondered if it had kept its beauty, had no doubt that it had, and now she would never know.
“I... I guess I like it,” Nate answered. His phantom erection took another jump as she touched his vacancy lightly. His answer might have flown, but Valerie noticed a little more moisture in this eyes than should be there. Nate’s mind was whizzing at a thousand miles per second. He had just taken a good look at his mom for perhaps the first time, and he realized what a handsome woman she was. He wasn’t exactly lusting for her, but her beauty made him realize like never before that even if there was the slightest chance that had could lust for a woman, perhaps father a baby, he would never know now. It seemed to him that his relationship with Tim might well be in the beginning stages of dying, but in cutting off his penis he had severely limited his options. Actyally, that’s why he had done it, wasn’t it?

She had been afraid of this. She had expected some amount of depression and self doubt after her son had had his surgery, but she had never dreamed he’d allow her to see it. She’d been afraid from the start that it was a mistake, but Nate had been so sure, so determined! And now it seemed they would both pay the price for their mistake. “Thanks for showing me,” she whispered. “For what it’s worth, I like the look. But you’re not ok with it, are you Nate?”

To Valerie’s total astonishment, Nate burst into tears. He took a step toward her, his shorts still around his ankles, then lost his balance and fell against her. She lost her balance and they both fell across the bed, Nate clinging to her and sobbing as she’d never seen or heard before. “I shouldn’t a done it, Mom,” he wailed. “Tim is... He’s... He thinks...”
“Tim’s what?” she said as her hands roamed all over his strong back, now lurching with sobs. “What did he say to you?”
“He’s... I think he’s gonna lose interest in me, Mom! He’s already had... while I was in surgery, he and Carlos... I mean, they used to be lovers, and... and while I was in surgery they...

Valerie lay on the bed, her son in her arms. She was starting to get a little uncomfortable with her son so close to her and half naked, but that wasn’t what was important right now. She felt her anger start to grow. Could Tim have been that insensitive? Could he possibly have done what Nate was implying, after having promised her on his honor that he would never leave Nate? Or could it be that he had no intention of leaving Nate but saw nothing wrong with a little extra action on the side. “Pull your shorts up and let’s go downstairs,” she said softly. “We’re gonna have to have a talk.”

****************************

Tim and Terry forgot all the issues in their lives as they busied themselves taking over duties with little Timmy. He was becoming a real human being now, and he had no end of smiles and giggles for his two “big brothers.” He hadn’t yet been bathed, so after they’d fed him, the two teens got the little boy into the bath where there were soon ample giggles coming from all three. “He loves those boys so much,” Virginia exclaimed. “I think it’s going to be a very sad day when Larry takes him away.”

Barry didn’t say anything. He was deep in thought, wondering what was going on with his own two sons. Terry seemed to be very subdued, which was completely out of character for him. Tim seemed ok, but Nathan wasn’t here and that was unusual. Before they’d gone to Cancun they were seldom apart for more than a few hours at a time, and even then they were almost constantly on the phone, or exchanging notes and jokes on the Internet. Tonight Tim hadn’t even fired up his computer yet! Finally he couldn’t stand it any more, so he went into his den and closed the door. There were some business matters he had to discuss with Valerie anyway.

After Timmy was bathed, Terry volunteered to get him dressed for bed. Tim thought that only fair since he had dominated the little boy ever since they’d got home. Terry got Timmy on the changing table, to which he now had to be strapped for his own safety. He was promising to be a very active, very full of energy little boy. Eventually after considerable struggling, Terry got the baby powder and applied it liberally, then began to rub it in. When he reached the tiny genitals, Timmy squealed with delight. His little wee-wee actually grew to the point that the abundant foreskin began to slide back, revealing the perfect pink little head. Terry’s heart skipped a beat as he remembered his own prick and how well it had served him, what a great plaything it had been, and how awfully he had treated it in return.

First he thought of the many times, even before he was capable of shooting, that he had literally fallen asleep in his bed while playing with it, massaging it, rubbing it. Of all the wonderful things he had done as a little boy, none had ever come close to comparing with the delights he had derived from playing with himself. Then as it matured, he had been in awe at how quickly it grew, the hair began growing around it, and then it had started spurting. He had known it would happen sooner or later, but it had still be something of a shock - a very pleasant one - the first time it had happened. And then the fun had really begun!

He hadn’t been shooting all that long when he’d had himself circumcised, and he had always regretted having it done. But worse than that, when it came time time have it cut off, he had already forgot the time during his healing when he couldn’t stroke it. That had been so maddening, and yet he had subjected himself to a lifetime of that same frustration. Had he been totally out of his mind? Uncle Jason had tried to tell him, as had Tim and Nathan, that he was simply too young to commit to one person in such a dramatic way. Even Laura, at 18, was very young to have made not one decision, but two. She at first had said there would never be another love in her life, and then she had declared that she would never be comfortable with the prospects of being the recipient of a male organ. Now, for the first time as he stared down at the tiny genitals of a giggling little boy, Terry knew they’d been right. He had made a somewhat stupid decision, and now he would have to live with it.

Terry was just reaching for Timmy’s thick night diaper to put it on the little boy when his tiny penis erupted. The stream of urine rose about 18 inches, then landed on Terry’s chest, soaking his entire front. “You little pisspot!” Terry exclaimed as he tickled the little guy, who giggled himself almost into hysterics. “What’s wrong?” Virginia asked as she walked by in the hallway.
“He peed on me!” Terry answered.
“Payback time,” Virginia laughed. “You did that to me dozens of times. Babies have no control, you know. When it’s ready to come out, it just comes out. That’s why they have to wear diapers.”
“He doesn’t have to enjoy it so much,” Terry grumbled. Of course he knew precisely what his mother was talking about, and from personal experience.

******************************

Laura sat in her room Saturday evening, thinking of all that had happened during the past two weeks. She had been welcomed home by her parents, as had all her male companions, but like the boys her parents sensed that she was bothered by something. After assuring her parents that she’d had a good time and that she was still a virgin, they had all had a good meal which her parents had worked most of the day preparing. Finally after she had spend what she thought was a politically correct amount of time with her parents, Laura had excused herself and gone to her room to unpack.

Laura knew that things were ok between her and Terry, although she knew her young lover would be needing a lot of reassurance over the next few weeks. Tim and Nathan, she knew, were quite another matter. As hard as she tried, she couldn’t get their parting out of her mind. She had no idea what on earth was going on, but she knew without any question that whatever it was wasn’t good. She had already told her parents that she would be expected at the Chandler home Sunday afternoon, but that wasn’t soon enough for Laura. She had to talk to Tim, and she had to do it tonight. But she also knew if she called the Chandler home and asked for Tim and not Terry that Terry would get the wrong idea. She realized as she pulled the various articles of clothing out of her suitcase and put them away that she still cared very deeply for Tim, and that his happiness was important to her. There could never be any doubt that she was in love with Terry, but she was no less in love with Tim. So against her better judgment, she picked up her phone and dialed the Chandler’s number.

***************************

It was almost 10 PM when Tim opened the back door of the Seymore home and walked in. He had long ago been told by Valerie Seymore that he didn’t have to knock, in fact he had a key for when there was no one home. He knew somehow that Nate and his mother would still be up in spite of the hour, but still he was not prepared for what he found as he walked into the living room. Nate was there, clad only in his boxer shorts, nestled in his mother’s arms. He wasn’t exactly asleep, but he wasn’t awake either. Valerie was not fully awake either, but enough so that she was still caressing Nate’s delicious back softly, gently, as any mother would do. “Tim?” she exclaimed when she saw the intruder. “What in the world are you doing here?”
“A little bird told me I was needed here,” Tim answered as Nate woke up and stared at him sleepily.

Nate didn’t move. He eyed Tim suspiciously and snuggled a little closer to his mother. “Can I talk to you, Nate?” Tim requested.
“I was just gettin’ ready to go to bed,” Nate responded.
“Please?” Tim added. Valerie pushed her son off her lap. “Go with him,” she urged. She’d had a hard time convincing herself that Tim could be so cruel as to abandon his lover that easily. That simply wasn’t the Tim she had come to know. Slowly, reluctantly, Nate got off his mother’s lap and followed Tim down to his bedroom.

Laura had spoken to Terry briefly, explaining to him that she thought something was going on between his brother and Nathan. Terry had agreed, saying that he felt something wasn’t right, but he had no idea what to do. Laura had assured him that her motives were pure, then had asked to speak to Tim. “What the hell are you doing home?” she demanded when Tim came on the line.
“It IS my home,” Tim responded. “Unless I’m sadly mistaken, you’re home now too. You know...”
“I know something’s going on between you and Nathan,” Laura interrupted. “You can’t possibly tell me you don’t know something’s wrong!”
“I know,” Tim agreed, “but I don’t have any idea what’s wrong, and I don’t know what to do about it. I’m not a mind reader, you know.”

“Tim, I’ve got to ask, do you love Nathan?” Laura asked.
“What kinda question is that?” Tim defended.
“It’s a very pointed question, that’s what it is,” Laura replied. “So how about it, do you?”
“Of course I do! Why would you even ask? An’ what difference does it make to you anyway?” Tim demanded.
“It makes all the difference in the world, Tim,” Laura said. “I care about you! I always have and I always will. I care about Nathan too, and I know he’s hurting. Honestly, Tim, maybe you should have got castrated too. I think that testosterone muddles your mind. He needs you! Can’t you see that?”
“I was gonna call him tomorrow,” Tim said weakly.
“He needs you now, Tim!” Laura said in her demanding tone.
“But it’s late. He’s probably in bed...”
“You know he’s not. Now get your tail over there and see what’s going on. This can’t wait, Tim!”

Every fiber of Valerie’s being was demanding her to pull Tim aside and ask what he had done to her son and what his intentions were, but she resisted. She knew she should not interfere, that Nate needed a little space to work out his conflict on his own, if at all possible. It killed her to see her son hurting, but she was a good enough mother to know that she absolutely had to put her feelings aside and do what was best for her son. And right now, the best thing she could do was nothing at all. Still that didn’t stop her from saying a prayer, which she did. It also didn’t stop her from getting ready. If the meeting between Tim and Nate didn’t go the way she hoped it would, she would be there for her son, and God help Tim, the one who had hurt him!

“I gotta get up for church in the morning,” Nate said as he sat uneasily on his bed. “What is it, Tim?”
“I think that’s a question I should be asking,” Tim replied. “When we dropped you off this afternoon, you wouldn’t even kiss me. What’s going on, Nate?”
“I just... I dunno, Tim, I just don’t know where we stand any more,” Nate said as he fought unsuccessfully to keep his tears at bay. “I can’t share you, Tim! I know you and Terry have been fooling around a little and that’s ok, but I can’t share you with anyone else. I thought you understood that.”
“I do understand,” Tim replied. “What makes you think I don’t?”
“Tim, you and Carlos... I mean, you practically admitted that you were tempted. I got this picture in my mind of you and Carlos, with me lying on the operating table, my dick half cut off and blood all over the place, and you and Carlos are getting it on. What was I supposed to think, Tim?”

Tim tried to take Nate in his arms, but the young 16 year old shrugged him off. Finally he realized just how devastating his remarks had been. Finally he realized that this was not the same Nate that had left for Cancun two weeks ago. Finally Tim saw just how much of a sacrifice his young lover had made for him. Gone was the self confidence; gone was the assurance that he was as good as the next boy; gone were the feelings of self worth. Nate was now totally dependent upon the one for whom he’d had his manhood removed. Nate needed Tim now as much as Tim needed Nate, or perhaps even more.

“Mom?” Tim called from the crack in Nate’s bedroom door. “Would you please call my folks and tell them I won’t be home until tomorrow? Mom’s planning a big dinner and we’ll all be there for that, but I’ve gotta stay here tonight.”
“What’s going on, Tim?” Valerie inquired.
“I dunno for sure,” he replied. “That’s why I’ve gotta stay here tonight, if it’s ok.”

It was more than ok with Valerie. She breathed a sigh or relief as she dialed the number for the Chandler residence. She still didn’t know what was going on, but her worst fears had been dispelled. At least they were talking. At least Tim and Nate would be spending the night together, and hopefully things would get resolved. She still didn’t know exactly what Tim had done, but she hoped that it had been blown out of proportion by Nate in his mental confusion, his attempts to deal with his new body. In the meantime her job was to try to get over the guilt she was now feeling for having allowed Nate’s surgery in the first place.

Terry and Laura had a long talk on the phone after Tim had given him back the receiver. She asked him if he was ok and he answered that he was, but Laura knew from his tone that he wasn’t quite as ok as he claimed. “C’mon, Terr, this is me,” Laura coaxed. “Has something happened? Are you forgetting all that you and Coach Masterson talked about?”
“No, Laura,” Tim answered evasively. “I’m just... well, when we got home little Timmy was screaming. Mom said he’d been like that the whole time we were gone, but as soon as he saw Tim and me he quieted right down and was smiling and happy. I just got to thinking, now I’ll never know what it’s like to be a father. Tim and I bathed Timmy, and then I got him ready for bed. He’s got such a perfect little body, Laura. I know if anyone tried to do that to him, I’d kill the SOB without even thinking about it. I guess I’m finally realizing that it wasn’t fair to you, what I did...”
“We’ll have kids, Terry,” Laura told him. “It would be a terrible waste of a great guy for you not to be a father. And as long as you’ve still got your testicles, you can still father children. Believe me, Terr, I can’t wait!”

Terry felt a little better, and even better still after Laura had got him off the subject and onto his plans for the summer. The coach had told him he planned on starting the baseball season as soon as they were back in school, and that Terry and a few of his teammates would be playing a lot of basketball, season or no season. “We’re going after that championship next year,” the coach had said.
“It’d be so great if we could be the city champs,” Terry had commented.

“City?” the coach had questioned. “Terry, I’m talking about the state! And who knows? Maybe even the whole country!” Terry was as excited as a small child at Christmas as he recounted the conversation for perhaps the tenth time. Laura loved Terry most when he was like this: the maturity of a man twice his age, the intelligence of a brain surgeon, and yet the enthusiasm of a small child. She had to resist the urge to throw the phone down and run all the way to the Chandler home and throw her arms around him. After they’d hung up, she did the next best thing. She slipped into bed, taking his picture with her. She lay there in the dark, staring at his beautiful face which seemed to glow from the dim light coming in her window, and she fell into a peaceful sleep.

***********************

“I don’t remember inviting you to stay the night,” Nate said neutrally after Tim had closed the door.
“And I don’t remember needing an invitation,” Tim answered as he got undressed. “We’ve got to talk, Nate.”
“What do you wanna talk about?” Nate said. Tim could feel the tension building.
“I think you know,” Tim answered as he slid in next to his lover. Nate made no move to give him more room, so Tim just snuggled all the closer. “You’ve been treating me as if I had leprosy ever since we got off the plane. I’m sorry if I hurt you, Nate, but you asked a question and I answered it as truthfully as I could. I thought that’s what we were about: always telling the truth.”
“Well thanks for that anyway,” Nate said. “Unfortunately the truth hurt a little more than I had planned.”

Tim’s hand had found its way to Nate’s smooth chest and began to work its way downward. He could feel the body he was touching tighten up, and he expected at any moment to feel a hand try to push his away, but the hand didn’t materialize. “I don’t know what you think I was saying,” he said softly as he kissed Nate’s cheek. “I guess I’m not even sure myself what words I used, but you obviously got the wrong idea. What I was trying to tell you was... well, when Carlos and I first got together, it was really something. I was so much in love and I thought he was too, but then just a few months later my whole world came crashing down. I guess what I was trying to say was that I wished that had never happened. I kinda wanted to go back to that time for a little while because it was so great, but I know I can’t because I’ve got something better now.”

Tim’s hand had reached the waistband of Nate’s boxers, and still there was no resistance so he kept going. “But he’s got a cock and I don’t,” Nate argued. “I know how much you love...”
“LOVED,” Tim corrected. “The only two guys in my life are you and Terry, at least sexually. Neither one of you has one, so that’s a part of my life that’s over. I can live with that, Nate. We talked about it and I decided then that I could and would live with it. In a way it’s even better now. Every time I touched yours, or even looked at it, I would wish I had mine back. Now we’re even, or as you said, now we’re the same. I’m ok with it, Nate!”

Nate emitted a low moan as Tim’s hand reached the area where his stitches had been. He already had a respectable fuzz where his pubic hair had begun to grow back, and Tim found the site incredibly erotic. “It’s beautiful!” he whispered. “Doc Smith really did a great job on you. I love it!”
“Really?” Nate questioned. “You really love me this way?”
“I already told you,” Tim said, still whispering as he massaged and caressed the vacant spot, then moved further back and fondled the smooth balls he found there. “I would love you if you had everything cut off! I mean arms, legs, balls, nose, everything! If I hadn’t met you I’d have been in the sac with Carlos before he even got the words out, but things have changed now. I got the most gorgeous boy in the world for a love, and you’ve made yourself even more gorgeous for me and I love you for it.”
“And... And Carlos? Where does he fit in?”
“He doesn’t, Nate. He’s a friend and I’d like to keep in touch with him, but if it’s gonna make you feel uneasy I won’t. You’re all I care about and all I need.”

Nate didn’t say any more. When he felt his boxers begin to descend, he lifted his butt to allow them free passage. Tim was already naked, so Nate had easy access to that part of him he liked to touch. The light was still on, so Tim threw back the covers so he could give Nate a close inspection. “It’s so beautiful,” he exclaimed again. “Once the hair all grows back, you’ll look like it’s always been that way.”
“You want us to let the hair grow back?” Nate questioned.
“Yeah, don’t you?” Tim returned.
“I didn’t know. It was kinda fun, us both being totally bald down there. And after I’d shaved you, you had an orgasm. I just thought...”
“Uh-huh. I like it too, once in a while for a change. But most of the time I want that thick soft bush. It’s also easier when you have to strip in front of people. They’ll still notice, but it’s not as obvious.
“Yeah, I guess you’re right,” Nate agreed.

They went silent again. They were feeling and groping, kissing and sucking, both in ecstacy that their little tiff was over. Neither of them had a climax, but suddenly it wasn’t important. They had known the risks before their surgery, so as much as they would like it to be otherwise, their inability to cum was no surprise. Some time during their love making Tim turned out the light, but they didn’t stop for another half hour.

“It’s ok if you want to be friends with Carlos,” Nate said suddenly as he hugged Tim.
“I don’t have to if it makes you uncomfortable,” Tim offered.
“Really, it’s ok,” Nate said. I’ve got to get over these feelings of doubt. You’ve never given me any reason to doubt you, and I gotta get over all this, And besides, he’s in Mexico and I’m here.”
“It wouldn’t matter if it was the other way ‘round,” Tim countered. “We’re a pair, you and me, and we always have been, even before we knew it. You’re stuck with me, long as I’m good enough for you.”

**********************************

Terry lay in his bed, feeling about as comfortable and cozy as any time he could remember in his almost 15 years. It was Sunday night, their first Sunday back from Cancun, and Virginia had made their entire extended family feel so incredibly welcome that everyone had felt better for the experience. Tim and Nate, along with Nate’s mother, had been the first to arrive around 10 AM. Valerie had volunteered to help Virginia with the preparations. Tim and Nate were now touching, hugging, even stealing the odd kiss again thanks to Laura’s prodding, and the sight of them together had made Terry so proud he could feel himself swelling up inside. Laura had arrived next, around 11:30, and Terry couldn’t help from pulling her aside and hugging her warmly, thanking her for her part in reuniting his brother and his lover. “Get used to it,” Laura had told him, “I guess I’m probably going to have to take care of both of you for the foreseeable future.” That was fine with Terry because he knew that he and his brother were in good hands.

Jared had shown up just a few minutes after noon and was looking somewhat lonely, but it didn’t take that look long to vanish when he saw Timmy, dressed to the 9's, crawling around and charming everyone. That little guy had a way of worming his way into everyone’s heart, and no amount of depression, sadness, loneliness could resist. They had all had a fabulous afternoon eating chicken off the grill, veggies from the kitchen, drinking and being together. It had been the warmest, most wonderful Sunday afternoon and evening that Terry could ever remember, and had been topped off with a satellite phone call from Larry around 6 PM. He had wanted to know all there was to know about his son, which Terry, Tim and his parents were only too pleased to accomodate. Larry said he had no idea when he was getting home, the things were heating up in the Middle East, which of course meant that they would not be losing their adorable little boy any time soon.

Now that he was in bed, so incredibly happy it was almost painful, Terry did what Terry had always done in such circumstances. He slid his hand down his lithe belly, pausing only briefly at the waistband of his incontinent briefs, and on down to his genital area. Ever since he could remember, Terry had ended these “perfect days” with a good wank after he was in bed. Tonight was no different, except that he got a giant surprise when his hand reached his crotch. There was nothing there! Nothing at all, except a pair of very full testicles that longed for release.

Throughout the entire day Terry had not had a single thought of sex, penectomies, nothing! It had been that kind of a day. And tonight, even feeling the tightness of his special underwear had not reminded him of his new emasculated status until he had reached for his cock to give it a good workout, only to discover that it wasn’t there! The phantom erection he was feeling was so real, so urgent, so demanding that it had never once occurred to him that he would not get off tonight, but he didn’t. Even after discovering the vacancy that had once been a proud penis, Terry was undaunted. He had already cum twice since his penectomy and had no doubt that he could do it again.

He was wrong.

He tried everything he knew that night that he and Laura had done, except of course the oral ministrations, but nothing worked. Just as Tim had described, he could raise himself almost to the pinnacle of orgasm, but not quite high enough. Finally Terry gave up. When he had crawled into his bed he had been on top of the world; now he was on the verge of tears once again, as he asked himself repeatedly why in the world had he done such a thing. He had always jerked off at times like these! It had always been the perfect ending to a perfect day! Now it was to be no more as he finally fell asleep, the vision of his perfect cock in his head, the cock that he had done nothing but abuse.

Monday morning it was back to school for everyone. As with everything else in the past two weeks, situations varied widely from one boy to the next. Terry had the added problem of dealing with his “special” underwear, but at least it was showing some signs of improvement. Now he could at least feel when he was wetting, which the doctor had told him would be the first sign that he was regaining control. Even so, the added complication of smuggling clean underpants into the house and soaked ones out was a project he really didn’t need in his life.

When he got to school that first day, Terry learned to his horror that Coach Masterson, true to his word, had already put the wheels in motion to reassemble his basketball team that very day, as well as his new season’s baseball team. Terry had already planned to come to school already dressed under his clothes for gym and his athletic endeavors, but today, his first day at school, he was unprepared. As soon as classes were dismissed for the day, he had to present himself in the gym for his first basketball practice. He considered skipping it, but he knew that would not be appreciated, and he also knew that the coach would know that his uniform was in his locker, so there was apparently no way out.

When he finally got up the nerve to appear in the locker room, Terry got a pleasant surprise. Almost all the other boys were already on the gym floor, and those who weren’t were in different rows. Terry was basically alone. So he stripped to his underpants, then hesitated. Should he leave his incontinent pants on or take them off? He dearly loved the feel of that jock next to his skin, and he had been dry all day. He had just relieved himself successfully in the toilet, so he decided to chance it. He slid his special underwear off and as quickly as he could he put on his jockstrap and his basketball shorts. He was home free, at least for today.

The jockstrap felt really weird, and in spite of the tightness he felt around his waist, it seemed to him that the strap was too large. His cup provided more than ample room for all he had to put in it now: his two testicles. Gone was the crowded feeling of his penis and balls stuffed into the confinement of the support. Now his balls seemed to be floating around, looking for their companion. But their companion was gone, never again to occupy the cup or pouch of a jockstrap. Terry had to admit he missed the feeling of the cramped quarters he had always experienced when he was dressed for sports. It was beginning to seem to him that nothing was the same; nothing would ever be the same.

On the court, he had never been better. On the free throw line he couldn’t miss! His skill in stealing the ball was without equal, as was his finesse at faking out other players and turning what should have been well blocked shots into totally clear ones. There was just no stopping him, and suddenly it didn’t matter to him who saw what under his pants.

As soon as basketball practice was over, the boys were all instructed to hit the showers. “Chandler, a minute, please,” the coach said as Terry headed for the locker room. After the way he had played, no one gave it a second thought, except for Terry himself.

“I assume you’re going to baseball practice?” the coach asked when they were alone.
“Yes, sir,” Terry replied.
“Then I don’t see any need for you to shower if you don’t want to,” the coach suggested.
“I want to,” Terry responded. “I might as well get this over with. I know there’s gonna be a bit of an issue, and I don’t see any point in putting it off.”
“If you’re sure,” the coach said.
“No, I’m not sure at all, coach,” he said. “But I want everyone to be comfortable with me the way I am now before we play a game, so I might as well let everyone get used to it.”

Terry again managed to get undressed with no one the wiser about his two secrets. The thick underwear stayed in his locker along with his other clothes, and he headed naked for the showers. He managed to make it to one of the shower heads before someone noticed. “Yo, Chandler,” the boy called loudly, “you’re missing something!”
Terry looked the teen directly in the eye, trying not to notice that there were several others now staring. It certainly didn’t help matters that his pubic hair had only started growing back out. “Sorry, Johnson,” he called back just as loudly, “I know how much you enjoyed it, but it couldn’t be helped.”

There were a few nervous laughs from some of the team, but most of them were now eyeing Johnson, wondering what Terry had meant by the remark. Terry’s would-be tormentor turned his attention to the business of scrubbing his body, and Terry followed suit. He knew there would be questions, but he also knew those questions would either go unasked, or discreet inquiries would be made privately. With that one remark, it seemed, Terry had defused what might have become a rather ugly incident.

The boys all concentrated on their shower after Terry’s confrontation; all except Terry that is. Without even trying to hide it, he began checking out all his teammates. Every single one of them had a full package. Some were circumcised and some not, but they all had a full complement of male sex organs; all that is except Terry. He remembered what it had been like, showering with the other guys without giving it a thought. He had never once before in his life given any other guy so much as a second look. He had not been the best endowed boy in the showers, but he hadn’t been the worst either. He had been just another guy, with above average athletic prowess, but sexually he had been just one of the guys. That was all gone now. Whatever he was or was not, he would forever be known now as the kid with no dick. He still loved the feel of his vacant crotch, but at moments like this he would have gladly died to handle, fondle, feel a cock, any cock, as long as the sensations of being felt were also his own. But that was gone forever and nothing would ever bring it back. Terry’s debut as a dickless basketball player had been relatively successful in everyone’s eyes except Terry himself, who was still in the shower, deep in thought, long after everyone else had toweled dry and dressed.

Nate didn’t fare quite so well two days later when he presented himself naked in the shower room. The first boy to notice the missing organ nudged his neighbor and pointed. The neighboring boy did the same, and as each boy saw the spectacle, the noisy chatter in the showers became silent until there wasn’t a sound. No one said anything as Nate continued to wash, all the time steeling himself for the onslaught that he knew would come. He wasn’t disappointed.

“Seymore, it seems your boyfriend bit off your cock,” someone said. There was a roar of laughter. Nate ignored the remark.
“How about it, Seymore?” someone else said. “How long d’ya think you’re gonna keep your pretty college boy friend with nothing for him to chew on?”
“You don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about, Mason,” Nate spat back angrily.
“You tellin’ us you’re not gay?” another boy challenged.
“I’m not tellin’ you shit,” Nathan hissed. “But maybe you’d like to share with us all why it’s important to you whether I’m gay or not. And while you’re at it you can tell us all why it’s important to you whether I have a cock or not.”
“You callin’ me a queer?” the boy returned.
“I’m not callin’ you anything,” Nate answered defiantly, “I’m askin’ you to tell us.”

The situation was threatening to get ugly when Coach Malloy appeared at the doorway. “You guys have been in here long enough to take five showers,” he exclaimed. “You all makin’ love or what? Move your butts! And Seymore, I want to see you in my office as soon as you’re dressed.”

Nate made sure he was immaculately dressed before he knocked on the coach’s door. “Come in and close the door,” the coach ordered, then he got right to the point. “What the hell do you mean, showing up in my showers with no... like that?”
“What did you expect me to do, Coach, borrow one?” Nate quizzed angrily. He had totally had it with the entire scene, and he wasn’t about to take any more crap from anyone, teacher or no.
“You wanna tell me what happened?” the coach asked.
“No, sir, I don’t,” Nate replied hotly. “It’s none of their business, and frankly sir, it’s none of yours. I don’t see where my genitals, or lack of them, has anything to do with how I play your stupid games.”

The coach eyed the angry 16 year old carefully. “I wasn’t gonna ask you this, Seymore, but now I feel I have to. There have been rumors flying around this school ever since you arrived. I suppose you’ve heard them?”
“Yes, sir, I’ve heard them,” Nate said. “You’d have to be deaf and stupid not to hear them.”
“Are they true? Are you gay, Seymore?”
“I have never hit on anyone on the basketball team, or the entire school for that matter,” Nate stated forcefully. “As I understand it, as long as I don’t force myself on other students in a sexual way here at school, I don’t see where it’s any of your concern what my sexuality is, or even if I have any.”
“It’s my concern because I have to deal with the morale of the team,” the coach replied. “I assume you plan to play basketball next year?”
“Yes, sir, I do,” Nate replied. “I think I’ve already proven that I can play as well as anyone, and I don’t ever remember using my dick on the court. I’ve never used it yet, and it’s a cinch I’m not gonna use it now. But I WILL be at tryouts next fall, and if I don’t get an equal chance you can be sure I’m gonna find out why.”

Again the coach studied the young student. It was obvious that the young Seymore kid was properly pissed off. His face was red, his veins were sticking out in his neck, his jaw set and tight. “You’re right,” the coach finally said. “It’s none of my business what you do or don’t do in the bedroom, as long as you keep it out of the school. But please just calm down so we can talk.”
“I’m calm, sir,” Nate said defiantly. “I don’t ever remember being so calm or in control. As for my being angry, well, that’s gonna take some time.”
“Very well, but I have to ask you two questions, and these questions are relevant to your playing on my team. Firstly, I have to know, did you have your... errr... your surgery as a result of some life threatening illness?”
“No, sir,” Nate answered evenly. “I am perfectly healthy.”
“That’s good. This one is a little more sensitive, but I’ve got to know. Are you involved... I mean sexually or romantically with that Chandler kid that plays for Midwestern High?”
“No, sir,” Nate answered forcefully. “Terry is one of the best friends I’ve got, but he’s not my boy friend, if that’s what you’re asking. Off the court I would die for him and I know he would for me too. But on the court, he plays for Midwestern High and I play for Lincoln, and I think we’ve already proved that.”

Coach Malloy excused his young student, his curiosity still unsatisfied. He was pretty sure Nate was gay, but he had to agree that it really didn’t make any difference. He knew that there was a lot more to Nate’s story, but his main interest was in the kid’s considerable athletic ability and his physical well-being, and those two items seemed to be well in hand.

Nate continued to endure a lot of teasing, cat-calling and rumors for a few weeks, and would not have handled it nearly as well as he did had he and Tim not had their showdown before school started. There were times when he was in tears when Tim picked him up after school, but that wasn’t all bad either. Tim had broad shoulders and didn’t mind using them, and of course he had the empathy of one who had gone through the same ordeal, albeit a lot easier thanks to Larry.

****************************

Saturday afternoon had been interesting to say the least for Jared and his dad. When he arrived home, Jared discovered that the entire staff of the big mansion had been given the day off. Even Don, one he’d delivered Jared safely home, left for the rest of the day. Jared and his father were alone. His dad was in the kitchen, wearing a pair of shorts, a T-shirt, and a white apron. “Just about ready,” he told his son. “If you’ll go ahead and set the table I think we’ll be ready to eat soon as you’re done.”

Jared did, and they sat down to one of the most sumptuous meals Jared had ever eaten. “I had no idea you could cook like this,” he remarked to his father.
“There are a lot of things you don’t know about me,” his dad said. “There are a lot of things I don’t know about you as well, and I’m hoping to rectify both those situations. For example I’d like to hear all about Cancun. I assume you had a good time?”
“I had a great time, Father,” Jared answered nervously.
“Did you meet any nice girls?”
“I met lots of girls, and boys too, but not in the way I suspect you mean. I wasn’t there to find a mate, just to have fun.”

Suddenly Jared became very nervous. It hadn’t occurred to him before, but suddenly a revelation came blasting into his brain and jarred him into reality. He knew his father had the resources and connections to follow his every move if he so desired. Could it be that he knew exactly what had happened in Cancun? Did his father already know what Jared had no intention of ever telling him? Was this what this whole meal thing was about, to give Jared a chance to confess? And if that were true, then why the cat and mouse game? Why didn’t his father come right out and confront him with the facts?

Jared grew increasingly nervous as the afternoon faded to evening, and still none of the servants returned. His dad kept asking about ever aspect of his trip: where did he go, what did he do, whom did he meet. Had he seen such-and-such a landmark, had it been crowded at the beach, was there no one he wanted to go back and see. Jared answered all the questions satisfactorily, he thought, but by the end of the evening he was so nervous he was jumping practically out of his skin at every little noise. Finally he excused himself and went to bed, saying that he was expected at the Chandler home on Sunday afternoon. He still didn’t know if his father knew or not, but he had very strong suspicions.

Jared and Tim went to swim team practice together. Jared was nervous, while Tim was looking forward to one of the most dramatic scenes in his life. He knew there would be gawks and stares, but he presumed that the novelty would be over because the entire team were well accustomed to having one of their members without his sex organ. As far as their teammates were concerned, Tim was right. Jared had worked himself into a position of respect on the team and was well accepted now as one of their better swimmers, so aside from a few questions borne more of concern than curiosity, the nullified eunuch’s debut was easy. The coach, however, was quite another matter.

“What the hell happened to you?” the coach asked gruffly when he had Jared in his office.
“I think that’s pretty obvious,” Jared replied, “I’ve been nullified.”
“I don’t believe this is happening to me,” the coach said grumpily. “First I get a kid with no cock, and then I get one with nothing at all. What the hell’s going on?”
“There’s nothing going on that I know of,” Jared replied defiantly. “Besides, what does that have to do with my swimming ability?”
‘Nothing that I know of,” the coach replied, “but I’ll think of something. You’re off the team.”
“You can’t do that,” Jared challenged. “Just because I don’t have any...”
“I said you’re off the team, and so is Chandler. If you’ve got a problem with that, then I suggest you call your daddy in to push his weight around like he did to get you on the team in the first place. But until that happens, get the fuck outta my sight, you fuckin’ freak!”

Needless to say Tim was waiting for his friend outside the coach’s office. “He kicked us both off the team,” Jared said when he emerged. “He called us freaks, Tim!”
“I can live with that,” Tim replied. “Actually I was thinking about quitting anyway. The business keep growing, and Terry’s not gonna be much help what with his basketball and baseball. And I can’t stand that ignorant coach.”
‘You really don’t care?” Jared said with surprise.
“Absolutely not,” Tim replied. I’m kinda glad I didn’t have to make the decision. I enjoy swimming, but it just takes more time than I think I’m gonna have. But I’m worried about you, Jared. Without hormones...”
“I’ll be fine,” Jared assured him. “I’m gonna be pretty busy too, and I’ve got a weight room and pool at home so I’ll keep in shape.”

Neither boy confessed to the other that he was feeling something of a letdown because they’d been kicked off the team. In spite of the nasty, gruff swim coach, they had enjoyed the comradery of the team, the exercise, even the meets themselves. “It just kinda sucks that we get kicked off a team just because we don’t have genitals,” Jared observed as they walked to the parking lot.
“Weird people,” Tim observed. “I don’t think that coach ever liked either of us anyway. We could probably fight it, but...”
“Yeah, great idea,” Jared mocked. “Then the whole world would know. Maybe we’d get kicked out of society too.”
“You might as well get used to it,” Tim advised. “Whether we like to admit it or not, we’re freaks as far as society is concerned.”

********************************

Nate had gone to bed early. He knew Tim had swim practice and wouldn’t be able to see him, so once he had his homework done he kissed his mom and headed to bed. Things were really beginning to settle down, and he and Tim were as tight as ever, perhaps even tighter. They were spending a lot of time together and slept together at least four nights ever week, just like before Cancun. Neither of them had been able to cum since the night before their surgery, but it didn’t matter as much as Nate had thought; except for tonight that is.

As he got ready for bed, Nate’s mind wandered back to the time before he had achieved his Eagle Scout award. He had been so lonely, so afraid that he would never again be with his hero: Tim Chandler. He didn’t even realize it himself at the time, but he had been madly in love with Tim since that first night in the tent when he was only 12; actually even before that there was something - an attraction that he simply could not understand. When Tim had made those first advances in the test, Nate’s entire consciousness had been screaming silently at Tim, pleading with him to hurry up and get past the preliminaries to the point where they would touch each other. All of that seemed so long ago, yet in another way it was only yesterday. But there was one thing he had those four years while he and Tim were separated that he no longer had: the ability to dream and jerk off.

As he stripped naked and crawled into bed, Nate remembered all the nights alone. His mom was sick, either in the hospital or in her own bed, but either way she was in no condition to comfort her son. In those days Nate had been unable to get the memory of that Boy Scout tent, the face of the one he admired so much, the vision of Tim’s face, out of his mind. He would lie there in his bed, exhausted for doing the work, handling the responsibilities far beyond his years, and he would take his raging member into his hand and before long he would be stoking. His cock had always been his friend, and what an outstanding friend it had been!

Nate allowed his hand to wander to his crotch and experience the void that used to be the root of his magnificent penis. The thick lush bush was coming back now, thicker than ever. He knew Tim loved the feel of that area just as it was now, and Nate had to admit he loved it too. It was so smooth, so soft! The return of his hair had only added to the softness, the eroticism of the area, and he loved it. He allowed his hand to wander downward, past his full scrotum that was now a littlr more forward, a little tighter, to the tiny opening in his perineum. The whole area was alive with nerves, much more sensitive than it had been before his surgery. Nate knew Tim loved it and he was happy about that. He loved it too, really, but still...

Tim had induced the first orgasm in Nate’s life, and there hadn’t been another for a few months; but even without orgasm he had experienced some of the greatest feelings just from stroking, fondling, manipulating. And all the time he was experiencing such incredible feelings he was picturing in his mind the vision of his totally handsome Patrol Leader, Tim Chandler. Those nights of wanking, self manipulation, fondling and playing with himself had been what had sustained him through all those dark years. And now, on nights like this, when he hadn’t seen Tim since early this morning and wouldn’t see him for at least another 24 hours, it would have been really nice to be able to do that again. Oh sure, he could still fondle himself as Tim did every time they were together, but it wasn’t the same. Tim could invoke such feelings that it didn’t really matter that he couldn’t cum any more. Just the electrifying touch of Tim’s hand, the feel of those soft yet firm lips nuzzling his neck, the whispers of “I love you” over and over in his ears, were more than enough. But when he was alone, like tonight, as he knew he would be from time to time for the rest of his life, he had nothing! He had memories, dreams for the future, more love than he had ever dreamed of. He had his mother’s health and vitality back, and he had a self confidence he’d never known before; but lying alone in his bed he had nothing except the sensations of a hardon that wasn’t real. At moments like this Nate realized just how much of a sacrifice he’d made for his lover, and he wasn’t at all sure it had been worth it.

Next: XXX Life Goes On