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Our minister takes me aside after service while back, and asks for my advice. There's a young man who's been caught masturbating in class, in the school bathroom, at the beach, and during the church Service. Isn't there something I could do medically? I suggest that William and his Mom come to my office for consultation. So, there they sit. I heard that William, 13, had just recently discovered the orgasm potential of his penis. Uncircumcised, he found stimulation "excessive," according to Mrs. Spiller, William's Mom. His hands were in his pockets often, stroking. He also knew the wrath of his parents, principal, and especially the minister. He said knew he needed help. William's Mom, signed the consent form, specifying circumcision and frenectomy. She wanted William's circ to be tight and "clean." I was to amputate as much of his erogenous tissue as possible. I was ingenious to that end. Like most doctors, I use the gomco clamp. Its known to give the look parents seem to want. Tight, and just a little mucosa left. Because its tight, the frenulum is made taunt, and is often therefore excised. So far, so good, but my secret involves chilling the penis, so it gets really tiny. I can apply the very smallest bell to cover the glans for the gomco to clamp. This small bell enables me to place the circumcision scar just 1/8-inch below the corona. William follows me into the procedure room, and lies on the operating table. Hes like an automaton. I give him a general, and start by picking out a gomco setup designed for neonates. Way too small normally for an 13-year-old penis, but 15 minutes of ice and it fit, barely. Clamped, trimmed, and freed of the bell, Williams penis was bowed by his now tight frenulum. Snip, snip and trim. All clean, with no frenulum or delta. Nice look. I explain to William that hell have a hard time reaching orgasm, and bound to use lube to be able to masturbate. But now hes like lots of the men in America: His mother explains that now hell have to wait for marriage to have a penis. I pity that woman, thinking of William frantically pounding away. Word gets around among the regional minister crowd. I guess the Orange County liberal "no routine circumcision movement" is bust. A stream of kids coming in because "Dr. Hawkins gets results." So, now Im mutilating an average of 7 boys a day. At $375 a pop, takes 20 minutes max. Nationally, 20 of 75 boys on average, or more than 1000 neonates daily in America; think, there's a neurological castration going on right this minute. What a racket.
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