‘I’m pregnant,’ Christian said.

‘You’ve got to be joking.’

‘Unfortunately, no. It appears you somehow managed to fertilise my very first egg, saving me from a cycle, which I suppose I ought to thank you for, though I would have liked to see what women are complaining about.’

Matthew opened his mouth, and closed it again. ‘But how is that possible?’ he said.

‘I told you. I’ve got two different sets of genes. I ought to be able to make my own people, a thing I would have liked to try before I had some ugly brat of yours.’

‘Are you going to keep it?’

‘I notice you don’t offer to make an honest woman out of me.’

‘Is that possible?’

‘I’m sure we’d find a way. Star-crossed lovers and all of that.’

Matthew had forgotten how attractive Christian was, and as usual, he was spellbound by his eyes, which seemed more silver than blue in the sunlit bedroom. ‘Do you want me to marry you?’ he said, suddenly understanding what Christian meant, his voice rising to a pitch of incredulity.

‘Honestly, Matthew, you really are a little bit dumb sometimes. Of course I don’t want you to marry me.’

‘But you’re going to have the baby?’

‘Yes.’

‘And it’s mine?’

‘I’ve told you that.’

Matthew sat down on the bed and put his head in his hands. He couldn’t think straight. His head was pounding, and it was unbearably hot. Perspiration was dripping out of his armpits, and he had scratched his arms and chest till they bled.

‘Have you got any more of those tablets?’ he said, not looking up at Christian.

‘The Desultrodol?’

Matthew nodded.

‘How many do you want?’

‘How many can you give me?’ Matthew said, still staring at the carpet.

‘You’re not addicted to them?’

Matthew nodded, and then he looked up at Christian.

‘Shit, Matthew. That’s pretty stupid. That’s a pretty stupid thing to go and do.’

‘I couldn’t help it.’

Christian nodded, biting his lips.

‘I can give you fifty.’

‘Have you got them now?’

Christian nodded, studying Matthew closely, and Matthew turned his head down, relaxing. He needed a Desultrodol now. Needed three, at least.

Christian walked into his bathroom and came back again. He handed Matthew an envelope. Matthew opened it, and looked inside. The tablets were in there.

‘Can I use your bathroom?’ he said.

Christian nodded, staring at him.

Matthew went into the bathroom and closed the door. He took five of the tablets, and then, thinking that maybe wasn’t enough, he took a sixth.

‘You’re not supposed to do it every day you know?’ Christian said, when he came back again.

Matthew nodded. He folded the envelope and put it into the pocket of his jeans. And then he sat down on the bed again, put his head in his hands, and waited.

‘So what have you been up to?’ Christian said, straddling his desk chair and rolling it over to Matthew, with his arms on the back of it.

Matthew shrugged.

‘Playing Lukas, I suppose.’

‘I haven’t been playing him.’

‘Hey,’ Christian said, putting his hand out. ‘I wasn’t suggesting anything immoral.’

Matthew frowned, and lifted his head up. What the hell was Christian talking about?

‘There are other people, you know?’

‘Are there?’

‘A few.’

‘I’m really not interested.’

‘Moral Matthew.’

‘Have you been in Lukas?’

‘What?’

‘Have you been in him, since last time?’

Christian shook his head, staring at Matthew. ‘You’re really in a bad way, aren’t you?’

‘I’ll be alright in a minute.’

He exhaled, and tried to smile at Christian. ‘A baby!’

Christian nodded.

‘Fuck!’

‘Wasn’t part of the plans?’

‘Of course not.’

‘Oh, well. Shit happens.’

Matthew nodded. He exhaled. He could feel the tablets. They were coming on strong.

‘I don’t suppose you brought any of my stuff back?’

Matthew shook his head, spellbound by Christian’s eyes.

‘I wouldn’t mind getting those glasses back. They were supposed to be a present for my cousin you know? For his birthday.’

Matthew nodded. ‘I didn’t know you had any cousins.’

‘I’ve got seven. Six on my father’s side, and one on my mother’s.’

‘When’s his birthday?’

‘It was months ago.’

‘Well can I keep them for a while? If you’ve already missed it.’

Christian shrugged.

‘I don’t need the strobe, or the jocks, but I don’t see how you can keep your eyes open without the glasses. Not unless you had the room totally dark.’

‘You do kind of need them.’

Matthew nodded.

‘I can give you the other stuff back,’ he said, starting again, ‘only I broke your strobe light.’

‘Great.’

‘It’s just the bulb. I can get you a new one.’

‘You’re really hooked up on this, aren’t you?’

Matthew said nothing.

‘What are you doing to him?’

‘What?’

‘What are you doing to him? Lukas.’

‘Nothing.’

‘Nothing that any other guy wouldn’t do.’

‘What’s that supposed to mean?’

Christian shrugged.

‘Have you been going into him?’ Matthew said.

‘Playing him.’

‘Playing him.’

‘No.’

Matthew frowned, and nodded.

‘But I can imagine.’

Neither of them said anything for a long time.

‘So what have you been up to?’ Matthew eventually asked him.

‘I’ve been reading The Voyage of the Beagle.’

‘Yeah? What is that?’

‘It’s about a scientist who sails around the world in a giant wooden dog.’

#

When Matthew got home, he found the Desultrodol bottle, which he had put in his waste paper basket, wrapped up in a magazine. He figured it would be better for his parents to find the tablets in that, if they did find them, rather than in an envelope, even if the prescription was made out to Christian. That way, at least they would know what they were.

Still, though, he didn’t expect his parents to find them, and he put them back into the cavity under his bedside cabinet after he had counted them out. There were forty-four, like Christian had said. He had given him fifty. He figured that was enough for fourteen days, if he kept taking three, and it would have been enough for fifteen, if he hadn’t taken that sixth one. As it was, he would only have two left on the fifteenth day.

Matthew hit himself gently in the side of his head with his fists, telling himself that he had to wean himself off them.

Christian had said he wouldn’t get them for him anymore. He had said he wouldn’t do it that to him, and had told Matthew to get off them.

Matthew lay on his bed and held in his head in his hands. What was he doing? he wondered. How the hell had he got addicted to an amphetamine? Still, though, it felt so good. His cock was long now, always long. The tablets seemed to have done something to it. Before, when Matthew had been cold, or in the surf, his cock had shrivelled up. Now, it didn’t seem to matter. It was always full and floppy and full of blood. Long. And it was so fucking heavy.

He didn’t see how it could get itself erect, but it seemed to do it at the slightest thought. He pulled his jeans and jocks down to his thighs and held it in his hand and it came up just as big and strong as ever, though again, it seemed to have grown. He tucked his head down onto his chest and looked at it. It looked longer, and surely it was thicker.

Rodney had said, when they were out on the veranda, that it was the biggest cock he’d ever seen. And when Matthew had said,

‘Have you seen many?’ he had said,

‘Heaps.’

Matthew got up. He pulled the top drawer out of his desk and found the steel ruler.

It couldn’t have grown again, he said to himself, but when he laid the ruler along the top of it, he found that it was nine inches, and not only maybe nine inches, but a little bit more.

It had grown more than an inch and a half in a matter of weeks. How was that possible? It was getting embarrassing. It must be the tablets, he decided, though he couldn’t see how they could do that.

He spun the ruler around it slowly and found that it was still five and half, though maybe a little bit more. He bit his bottom lip and felt tears come out of his eyes. He didn’t want to be like this. He didn’t want to be a freak. And when he was wearing his jeans now, because it was floppy and full of the blood all the time, people looked at his groin. It looked as though he had a fist bunched up in there. He had seen his mother and father notice it once or twice, though they didn’t say anything, of course, but they had looked surprised. And his father had seen it the other day, naked.

Matthew put the ruler down and felt his balls. They seemed bigger too. Impossibly heavy and large, but it couldn’t be the tablets. The tablets couldn’t have made him grow like this.

It had to be genetic.

‘Oh, can it please not get any bigger?’ he said, looking down at his cock.