‘I told him I let you.’

Matthew had pulled off the road, pulled off the road out to the highway, pulled off onto an old logging track and followed it until it opened out into a wide glade. He had turned the car on the grass, and stopped, and he had wound the windows down. They were surrounded by forest. And the only sound they could hear was the sound of birds.

They hadn’t spoken, hadn’t said a single word since Lukas had come back from Rodney’s house. He had been gone for more than an hour. And when he returned, Matthew had picked up his stuff and led the way to the car, already dressed in his shorts and T-shirt.

He had supposed Lukas would follow.

Matthew had pulled the car off the road, after fifteen minutes or so of driving, had parked in the grassy glade, and stopped, hit the button for the windows.

‘So what did you say to Rodney?’ he said, knowing that his voice sounded angry, harsh.

‘I told him I let you.’

‘Cut your nuts off?’

‘Touch me.’

Matthew thought for a moment. ‘Did you tell him about your nuts?’

‘No.’

‘Do you think he knows?’

‘How could he?’

‘I thought he might have seen something.’

Lukas shook his head.

‘What did he say?’

‘He said I didn’t understand.’

Matthew nodded, biting his lips, and then he raised his fingers to his bottom lip, and took them away, to see if it was still bleeding.

‘He said you were trying to fuck him.’

Matthew nodded again, and frowned. ‘How could I have been?’ he said. ‘I was touching you.’

Lukas nodded.

‘I didn’t do anything.’

‘Well you must have done something. He said you pulled his shorts down and stuck your cock in his arse.’

‘How could I have?’

‘I don’t know.’

‘I didn’t even know he was there. I think I just brushed up against him or something. My hand probably brushed his arse.’

Lukas said nothing.

‘Don’t you believe me?’

‘I don’t know what to think.’

Matthew exploded. ‘Well how could I have done it Lukas? I was right up against the board touching you!’

‘He said you did.’

Matthew turned to him and screamed. ‘How the fuck could I have?’

Lukas pulled his head back and put his hand on the door. He opened the door and got out, closing it behind him.

‘Shit!’ Matthew said.

He got out of the car.

‘Where are you going?’

Lukas shrugged but kept walking away.

Matthew rushed up behind him and grabbed his hand. He spun him around and pushed him to the ground.

‘Don’t fucking walk away from me when I’m talking to you.’

Lukas looked frightened.

Matthew ran his fingers through his hair.

The cicadas in the glade started up – one, three, eight thousand – making a deafening sound that made Matthew feel insane. He felt as though the world was turning, as though he was on the very edge, on the very edge of a precipice and about to fall. He held his hands on his head and screamed, screaming at Lukas with all his might.

Lukas looked confused, worried and frightened all at the same time.

If Matthew had an axe, he would have hefted it into Lukas’ body.

He turned around, and walked back towards the car, with his hands planted in his hair.

He stopped halfway there.

‘Shut up!’ he screamed at the forest.

The insects stopped. A single bird whistled. And then there was silence. A gentle breeze ruffled the trees, and a cloud fell over the sun, throwing the clearing into shade.

Matthew got back into the car and sat there, sobbing.

When a long time had passed, the passenger door opened unexpectedly, and Lukas got into the car.

‘Are you alright?’ he said.

Matthew nodded, but he felt like hugging Lukas. And tears were dripping out of his eyes.

‘I don’t care,’ Lukas said.

Matthew wiped his eyes and stared at his knees. His cock, insanely, was hard. He had a fleeting impression, a brief idea, that he had become a different person lately, that he had become someone awful, and hateful, a person he’d never been, a person who was going insane, but it passed.

‘I mean, I’d rather if you didn’t, but I can’t stop you.’

‘What are you talking about?’

‘Fucking Rodney.’

‘I didn’t try to fuck him, okay?’

Lukas nodded. ‘He said he’s going to get you, you know?’

Oh, that was gold! Matthew threw his head back with his mouth open. ‘He’s going to get me, is he?’

Lukas nodded.

‘Does he know where I live? Does he know my name? Does he know anything about me?’

Lukas opened his mouth to say something, but decided against it and shook his head.

‘You know he planted his cock in your arse that day in the change room? I don’t suppose that matters?’

‘I didn’t mind.’

‘Well of course you didn’t fucking mind, you stupid little faggot. You’d like any guy’s cock up your arse, wouldn’t you?’

Lukas turned his head down and turned it towards the passenger window. He muttered, ‘Only yours.’

Matthew nodded to himself. Fuck he was going to cut this little prick’s cock off. Whether he fucking wanted it or not.

‘So what did you talk to him so long about then?’ he said. ‘You were gone for more than an hour.’

‘He made me a cup of tea. In a pot and everything, and we sat out the back, on the porch.’

‘Oh, he’s a fucking saint, isn’t he Lukas? He made you a cup of tea. He didn’t put his hand round your shoulder, or put it around your waist. Or touch you arse? He didn’t slip his hand into your groin, did he?’

Lukas said nothing.

‘He didn’t have a little feel?’

Lukas didn’t answer, but he swallowed.

‘He’s a right fucking nut.’

Again, Lukas said nothing.

‘I’ll cut his fucking gear off if he ever comes anywhere near me, the fucking fruitcake.’

Lukas nodded, but he wasn’t agreeing.

‘Where’s your phone?’

‘What?’

‘Where’s your phone?’

Lukas pulled it out of his pocket and handed it to Matthew.

Matthew found Rodney’s number. He blocked it, and deleted it, and then he handed the phone back to Lukas.

Lukas frowned at it. He looked through his contacts and put it away.

‘You didn’t tell him your address did you?’

‘No.’

‘You didn’t tell him mine?’

‘No.’

‘Well, we’re not coming up here again. You understand that?’

Lukas nodded. He started to say something, but stopped.

‘What?’

‘He said he knew who you were.’

‘What?’

‘He said he’d find you. He said you had something that ought to be his.’

‘Yeah. Your cock.’

‘What?’

‘Don’t worry. He’s a fucking fruit.’ Matthew started the engine.

When they had turned onto the highway and were nearing the Exxon, Lukas said,

‘You probably should get some ice for your eye. It looks pretty bad.’

‘Can you shut the fuck up? I don’t want to hear your fucking voice again? Do you understand that?’

Matthew glanced at him. He looked back at the road, steadied his hand on the wheel, turned back to Lukas, and punched him in the side of the head.