Thus it was that the following advertisement appeared in a Chicago newspaper for several weeks in the Fall of 1878. " ONANISM CURED !! in Five, ~5~ Minutes only ! Have you struggled, to no avail, against the masturbation habit ? Have you tried every purported cure and found them all ineffective ? DO NOT DESPAIR ! Salvation of your health, sanity, and manhood are at hand. I, Dr. Charles Latan, have discovered the TRUE and PERFECT CURE for the Onanism habit. The procedure can be done in a mere 5 minutes. There is no need to have an appointment. So quickly is it done that no one need wait more than about 20 minutes.

WHY SHOULD YOU CONTINUE TO SUFFER ? Health and vigor can be restored in a mere FIVE MINUTES ! Come to my office, Suite 32-B, 147 Houston Street, Chicago, Illinois and end your fruitless struggles with the insidious habit which is undermining your health."

Several glowing testimonials, signed only with initials, followed this advertisement.

This advertisement came to the attention of a young man named Jacques Orff who saw in himself the young man described in the advertisment. He had tried every masturbation cure he had ever heard of, except the prohibitively expensive Swiss cryohydrotherapy cure which required a journey to Switzerland and a stay of three to six weeks at the Cryophydrotherapeutic Institute in Davos.

He had dosed himself with every nostrum advertised for the purpose, some of which were so noisome that he could not keep them down long enough to give their alleged benefits a fair trial. No method of tapering off could he make succeed because the frequency of his indulgence varied from day to day, depending on opportunity. It was never less than three times a day and often was as great as eight. If he did succeed in abstaining for a day, he more than made up the difference the next day.

Cold hip baths gave him piles (or so he thought) but did not diminish his ardor in the least. He avoided girls and tried to avoid even looking at them, but this did not deter him from interminable daydreaming about them. Jacques wore a long coat in all but the hottest weather to conceal his embarrassing erections. He had even considered castration to end his torment, but recoiled from the prospect.

But now, Dr. Charles Latan offered a perfect cure in only five minutes ! It seemed too good to be true. Jacques had apparently never heard (perhaps it was not yet current in the 1870's) the maxim : "If it seems too good to be true, it is."

Jacques lived only a dozen miles from Chicago and within walking distance of a railroad station. The next morning found him in that station, clutching a ticket to Chicago in his hand impatiently awaiting the train. He fretted throughout the short trip and, upon arrival in Chicago even squandered 5¢ on a jitney to save the time which would be wasted in walking to Dr. Latan's office.

There were two men ahead of him in the waiting room; one, apparently about 30 years old, was tremulous and haggard. The other, about 18 years old, was blushing furiously and kept his eyes downcast.

Jacques Orff, despite his extreme overindulgence in "the solitary vice" , at age 23, appeared healthier than either of them. He had been seeking to extricate himself from the toils of habitual self-abuse for ten years, but the habit appeared to have taken little toll upon his robust physique.

A young man came out of Dr. Latan's office walking rather gingerlily with his legs far apart. Dr. Latan appeared in the doorway, round-headed, of medium height, with a thin moustache and a goatee. He called out "Next !" The tremulous, exhausted-looking man rose unsteadily and plodded with dragging footsteps into Dr. Latan's office. About seven minutes later, he emerged, looking relieved, though still weary.

The embarassed 18-year old evidently wanted to get the whole thing over as quickly as possible. He was in Dr. Latan's office for no more than five and one-half minutes before he emerged smiling. Again, Dr. Latan called out "Next." Jacques rose and entered the doctor's office.

He gave Dr. Latan his name and explained how long and often he had been masturbating and some of the measures he had taken, unsuccessfully, to break the habit. Dr. Latan nodded. The story was evidently a familiar one. Then Jacques asked "Just what does this cure consist of and how does it work ?" Dr. Latan replied "It occurred to me one day that, if the onanist had no feeling in his member, he would be unable to masturbate and must, perforce, cease. Of course, the anæsthesia of the organ must be temporary, enduring only as long as required for the patient to become accustomed to not masturbating.

Research into the matter revealed to me that severing the pudendal nerve, the principal sensory nerve of the membrum virile, would deprive the organ of sensation until the nerve regenerated and the connection to the nervous system was re-established. Reports of the effects of nerve injuries to that part of the body sustained by soldiers in the recent unpleasantness between the North and South indicated that regeneration requires about three to six months to occur. So, the cure consists of severing the pudendal nerve in the perineum so that the virile member is deprive of all feeling for three to six months.

Masturbation having been made impossible for that length of time, when sensation returns, the patient has desisted from self-abuse for so long, he no longer needs to practice the vice and is most unlikely to resume it."

Had Jacques taken a moment to recall the unpleasant effects of desisting from masturbation for only a few days in his many attempts to break the habit, especially the sickening ache in his testicles, it might have given him pause, but he did not. He was so enthralled by the prospect of a quick cure for the problem which had tormented him for ten years, that he did not consider possible unpleasant possibilities.

Upon inquiring about the price, Jacques was delighted to learn that the cure was not only quick but cheap: only $2.00, "in silver; no scrip, please." Jacques, a bit of a cheapskate, was so delighted by the price that it utterly dispelled any lingering doubts he might have had.

The procedure , though performed without benefit of anæsthesia, was only momentarily really painful. Jacques lay on the operating table with his legs as wide apart as possible, as instructed by Dr. Latan who then laid Jacques' long penis on his belly and secured it with a strap across the table .

The operation site, the perineum between the base of the penis and the anus was washed off and dried. Dr. Latan made a small incision exposing the urethra, blood vessels, and nerves. He caught what he presumed to be the pudendal nerve with a blunt hook. Whatever doubt he might have had whether it was the right nerve was dispelled by Jacques' yelp of pain. "Be ready. This will hurt." Dr. Latan warned Jacques. It did, but being prepared, Jacques managed not to scream. The pain ended as quickly as it had begun. The severed ends of the nerve retracted from each other into the incision. One stitch closed the incision which was then dressed by an application of collodion.

"There maybe some swelling and inflammation there" said Dr. Latan,

"but it should go away in a few days. When you wipe yourself after defecating, be sure to wipe backward, not forward. Keep the incision clean. There's no need to come all this way to remove the stitch. In two weeks you can remove it with cuticle scissors. That will be two dollars, please."

Having given Dr. Latan two silver dollars, and shaken Dr. Latan's hand, Jacques left, about eight minutes after he entered Dr. Latan's office. He was aware of a stinging pain between his thighs which made walking uncomfortable enough that he decided to hire a jitney for 5¢ for his return trip to the railroad station. Jacques did not have long to wait for one bound in the right direction.

The rail trip homeward was uneventful, but, when he settled into his seat, he lifted his heavy testicles to avoid sitting on them, and then, for the first time noticed the numbness in his penis. There was, indeed, no feeling in it at all.

The next few days revealed the disadvantages of the five-minute cure.

True, he could no longer masturbate, but he desperately wanted to. He was as horny as ever, and, though his penis was numb, it still became embarassingly erect whenever he saw or even thought about a pretty woman. Stone-ache (congestive orchialgia) set in after about three days without masturbation and soon became sickeningly intense, but there was nothing he could do to relieve it. Carefully feeling his aching balls, Jacques noticed that the epidydimes were swollen even bigger than the testicles themselves, engorged as they were with undischarged sperm.

It was a full week before a nocturnal emission finally gave Jacques some relief, and soaked his night shirt and the sheets with semen. The relief was only partial, however. Soon, he found that semen was also discharged when his bowels moved, when he urinated, and when he made any strenuous exertion. So, he had exchanged a masturbation problem for spermatorrhea. By about three weeks after the severing of the pudendal nerve, there was a nearly continuous oozing and dribbling of semen from his numb penis.

To prevent further staining of his trousers and underdrawers, Jacques found it necessary to tie his long foreskin with a piece of string every morning. This was successful but made it awkward to urinate. He did not find spermatorrhea exhausting or debilitating as he had been led to expect by some of the literature on young men's problems which he had read. It was only a blasted nuisance.

His unabated horniness, on the other hand, was maddening. His days were filled with erotic daydreams and his nights with erotic dreams accompanied by nocturnal emissions. He was also troubled by trouble in urinating. He felt a strong urgent need to pass water frequently, but could get very little out at a time. This problem finally forced him to consult a general practitioner.

Jacques explained to Dr. Reading all about the 5-minute cure and its effects on him. Dr. Reading seemed angry and Jacques was taken aback, but Dr. Reading assured him "I'm not mad at you, young man. You're just an unfortunate victim. This Dr. Charles Latan( give it the French pronunciation and see what you get) is a damned QUACK ! There is no guarantee that the ends of the pudendal nerve will EVER re-connect. If any scar tissue forms between them, they won't !

He's right about one thing, though, if they are ever going to re-connect, it'll take place within six months. If sensation hasn't returned to your penis by then, it NEVER will. Your present problem is caused by prostatitis, probably caused by your practise of tying off your prepuce. The back pressure of the undischarged semen is causing engorgement, inflammation, and swelling of the prostate gland which, encircling the neck of the bladder as it does, chokes off the flow of urine.

Prostate massage will relieve the congestion and permit you to urinate normally, which is very important, to avoid damage to the kidneys. Rather than tie off your foreskin, you're going to have to wear a urinal of the kind used by incontinent men. In a sense, you are incontinent, seminally incontinent.

I am going to have to massage your prostate gland through the rectum at least once a week until this problem is resolved. If the overactivity of your testicles, brought about by your excessive masturbation, does not subside naturally, the only recourse to relieve your satyriasis and sexual erethism would be castration. If, as I fear, sensation does not return to your penis, you would have to go on as you are for the rest of your life. I believe that castration would be preferable to that. I want you to consider it carefully while waiting for feeling to return to your male organ."

After the prostate massage, which did make him feel much better, Jacques was appalled and disheartened about his prospects for a normal life. He wrote a long bitter letter to Dr. Latan which the Post Office returned stamped "Addressee Unknown" . Evidently the quack had decamped.

For five long months, Jacques waited in vain for feeling to return to his long frequently erect penis. There was no change. He had been considering the advisability of castration. He studied all of the literature he could find in the public library and asked questions of Dr. Reading during his weekly prostate massages. He was aware of the advantages and disadvantages which he had to weigh against his current miserable state.

If castrated, he would be very much less horny, about 95% less. He would no longer suffer from spermatorrhea. He would no longer have bouts of stone-ache. He would no longer need weekly prostate massages. On the other hand, he could lose up to half of his muscular strength and stamina. Unless he adopted a Spartan regimen of diet and exercise, he would become fat, even morbidly obese. His facial hair would stop growing, and he would lose almost of all body hair. And, worst, he might even grow breasts !

At the end of six months following Dr. Latan's 5-minute "cure", Jacques returned to Dr. Reading for his last prostate massage. He had resolved to undergo castration.

The operation was performed in Dr. Reading's office (as was customary for all but major surgery at that time) and required only about 40 minutes under general anæsthesia . After a 2-week recovery period, Jacques felt better than he had in years. Gone was the unbearable insatiable lust. Gone was the spermatorrhea. Gone was the need for prostate massage. Jacques was aware of a loss of strength, but it was in no wise as severe as he had been led to expect.

The regimen of diet and exercise were not as onerous as he had anticipated and he was spared the indignity of gynecomastia. Though his nipples became more prominent and the areoles around them widened and darkened, no detectable breasts developed behind them.

Jacques had always disliked beards and moustaches and found shaving a nuisance. He was pleased, therefore, when it was no longer necessary.

The finality of his choice and the changes going on in his body made Jacques melancholy for a few weeks following his castration, but afterward he felt calm and contented with his state. His only source of regret was that he could never have any children.

Now that he was no longer wasting time masturbating and, later, worrying about his penis, Jacques found time to develop other interests. He took up painting and found, to his delight, that he possessed real talent. Though he continued to be employed at the bank, Jacques Orff acquired a local reputation as an artist, noted for landscapes, still-lifes, and an occasional portrait in oils.