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Willie Most folks call me Willy but my real name is William Beaufort Lee after some Colonel that died in the great war. Dont worry about such things though as I live in a big old house off 40th and Pine that I used to share with my Ma till she up and died last year. Never knew my Pa; Ma just called him a Rollin Stone, and my Brother LeRoy told me that he never did nothing good. LeRoy is in some hospital up north where they put him cause he got shot in the head and dont remember nothing no more. I went up to see him once, but he just sits there and stairs at the ceiling and dont talk about nothing so I havent gone back. Never finished school; actually never really started but got hired on at this big legal firm in town where the bus takes me everyday. The bus driver, Ralph, is great and is always teasing me about my clothes and glasses and stuff, but hes a nice guy and sometimes gives me candy. I sort mail in the mail room and get paid every other Friday but most of the money goes to comics. People say Im stupid cause I spend my money on comics and hamburgers but they dont know what I know about these comics that will be worth a lot of money someday. I hardly ever see my boss - only twice a year when he calls me into his office and tells me what a good job Im doing and gives me some extra money or candy. Everyone treats me just fine and I like them all cause Ive known most of them for better than fifteen years now. Sometimes in the afternoon, I get to watch cartoons on a small black and gray TV we hide over in the corner, but most of the time were too busy. I love toons and Bugs is my most favorite. Everything changed a week ago when I was taken my mail onto the fourth floor for my mid morning run. I went into Ms Thorntons office to drop off her stuff and she was on the phone drinking coffee with one of her long legs up on the desk. Im in love with Miss Thornton; shes so beautiful and sexy with her long skirts and suit coats that hide everything but how beautiful she is. She has her own office with blinds on the windows and a grand view of the freeway. Everyone was afraid of her and I was too because they always said yes maam and no maam and acted so business-like when they were in her office. Ruby says shes a carpet muncher but I know she aint cause she dont wear red lipstick and has long dark hair. I heard her once yelling at some poor guy in a suit because he called her stuck-up or something and he never went near her office again. I never have problems though, cause I think she likes me cause she always smiles and gives me candy and greets me with a soft voice and her eyes are so big and beautiful even behind those big ugly glasses she sometimes wears. I get feelings for her like I used to get for my Mary Lou and sometimes I go home and beat my lizard just thinking about Ms Thornton without any clothes on. Mary Lou and I got married some twelve years back on May 20th in a Baptist church that burnt down last Halloween night. Everyone said it was some punk kids but I knows it was some witches that eat bats eyes and torture little boys when they wander too close. Dont ask how I know these things but I just do cause Im smart, I guess. Anyways, Mary Lou had come to live with me and my Ma since afore I remembers cause Ma said that her Daddy used her as a cumbag, whatever that was. She used to stroke my lizard all the time cause she loved to watch him spit and wiggle but one time she tried to bite off his head and it hurt real bad and when I yelled at her she just kept hitting my nuts till I rolled on the floor and cried. The next day her clothes were gone and so was she but I figure shell come back some day when she gets lonely and Ill just wait. Right now though, when I get that feelin betwixt my legs (you know what Im talkin about), I visit the hos off of 86th on the other side of the tracks to let my lizard spit. Leroy always said that a limp lizard would one day fall off so I tries to keep him hard whenever I think about it. Anyways, when Ms Thornton reached up to get her stuff with the phone still stuck in her ear, her shoulder sort of slipped a little and the phone started to slide to the floor so when she reached up with her other hand with the coffee cup, she done spilt it all over her pretty suit jacket and white blouse and I could see the frilly thingy she wore underneath. Now I might be a little slow sometime, but I sure wasnt going to stick around and get yelled at so I done dropped everything and made a bee line for the door. Just before I reached it though, she commanded me to stop. I was shakin so bad my teeth were clatterin when I turned to face her. Its not your fault Willie, I was too warm anyway, she said. She removed her coat and started undoing the buttons on her stained white blouse and I felt like I would pee. She slowly made her way to her very own bathroom and called out, Wait a minute, will you please while I change? Little did she know that I could see what she was doing cause she left the door opened a little and there was a mirror that showed everything. I could see her pearly white skin and her two gorgeous udders as her frilly thing slipped past her shoulders. When she undid her skirt, I couldnt make out her fur patch (lizard den as I call it) but I could see her two firm butt cheeks as they strained against her shorts and I felt my lizard stirring to life. She glanced up and caught me staring at her with drool dripping from my lower lip. Now its not nice to stare, is it Willie, she admonished gently as she closed the door the rest of the way. I stood there and thought about the two gorgeous globes Id just seen and considered bolting for the john to make my lizard spit. But just as I turned, Ms Thornton opened the door and stepped out with a whole new get up and a smile that made me warm all over. Thanks Willie, your such a sweetheart, she said softly and my lizard starting shaking all over. I turned and mumbled Yes maam as I stumbled out of her office and right into the arms of Ruby. Whoa, Willie, where you going. Oh, are you glad to see me or something, she exclaimed when she saw the bulge in my jeans. No maam, I said weakly and I turned all red and bolted for the john. I was so shamed that I didnt even come out until I thunk everyone had gone home and the lights went out. They werent gone though cause Ms Thorton was still in her office with her ugly glasses on. She called out to me as the door to the john squeaked shut. Willie, come here a minute, would you please? Yes maam, I mumbled and stumbled slowly over to her open office door. Come in and sit down, she invited soothingly. I went in and plopped down on the plastic couch that was supposed to look like leather. The fake flowers on the table next to me smelled like window cleaner. I didnt have nothin to say about nothin and just stared at my hands, pickin at one of the paper cuts that I had gotten earlier in the week. Its not your fault Willy, she soothed. Yes Maam. Call me Ellen, Willie. Yes, Maam. Willie, how old are you know? I could feel my neck gettin red. Twenty-nine, Maam Ellen Maam. Do you have any children? No Maam, the words were gettin harder as my throat started to lock up and the pitcher of water on the right hand side of her desk suddenly looked better than a bottle of Annie Green Springs. Look, I dont mean to pry, Willie, but according to your records here, youve held the same job for the last 15-years. Thats something to be proud of! I am Maam, I said, afraid she might hear how nervous I was. Is this all you want to do with your life? Huh? Willie, dont you want to earn more money and maybe have a family someday? Uh, I dont know. She just sort of shook her head and leaned back in her chair. I could feel her studying my hair and wondered if the little greasy white cheese balls that grew up there were starting to clump. After a long while she spoke again. I would like an opportunity to give you a chance to make someones life special, she said in a soft voice that made me nervous all over again. Have you ever eaten pussy? Huh? Have you ever tasted a womans genitals, Willie? Uh. . .I tried once, maam, I stuttered as I tried to figure if she was horny or something. But the ho was all bloody and . . . Hold on, thats a lot more than I need to know Willie, but thank you for your honesty. Yes maam. Would you like to lick mine, she asked as she rose and walked around the desk, naked from her hips to the floor. I fell to my knees and thanked God for my tongue as I crawled over to lick the small furry patch that was already drenched with her female perfume. She leaned back against her desk and I started knawing on those puffy rabbit ears like a starved dog. Gawd she was sweet tasting and beautiful too and she made sounds like a little kitten crying for saucer of warm milk. When her legs wrapped around me like a snake, I knew she was done gone to heaven, and her juices shot down the back of my throat like the water in a firehose. Her hands grabbed my hair and pulled my face deep into her kumquat as I kept on a bitin and lickin at averything within range, until I done run out of air and went to dream land. I woke up in a dark cellar with candles lit all around and tied to an old table with a red thing stuffed in my mouth. I just knew it was them witches that had burnt down the old Baptist Church cause I was naked and my lizard was shaved as clean as a babes ass. But when Ellen came over to me with a long hypo-needle and smiled that sweet smile that made me all warm inside but cold ever where else, I knew right away that she was still pissed about spilling the coffee. I faked like I was sleeping till I felt her rub my nuts with this cool thing that stunk like a hospital. Then I felt a little jab in my left nut that started burn like hell in just a few moments and then a jab in my other nut that made me start screamin bloody murder. She jabbed her elbow into my gut and my butt fell back onto the table as I started to pee. Hi Willie, I see your little wiener is still working; my, my; look at that geyser! Mmmmphhhh. I know this is a little disquieting, redneck, but in just a few moments well be through and you can start a new life with me. You see, with my help, Im going to rid the world of a loser and help you live a productive life. Could you imagine what would happen if you were allowed to procreate - wed just have more ugly welfare recipients. With that she reached between my legs and lifted up my lizard and squeezed its head really hard. Then, with the other hand, she took this shiny little knife and started slicing at my nuts. I didnt understand what she was talking about much less what she was doing but it started burning so bad down there that I tried to scream as everything went black. When I woke up, I was back in my house and Ruby was looking down at me smiling like shed just gotten some. In the hallway, there were some men with ladders and things and I could hear Ms Thornton telling them to do all kinds of stuff I didnt understand. My lizard hurt kinda bad and there was this burning deep inside that made me wanna puke. Ready, Ruby said as she got on the bed and lowered her black furry kumquat on my face. Naturally, I started eatin the dark meat as my lizard started to get ready even though it hurt. Not yet, Ruby, dear, came the voice of Ms Thornton from the doorway. Ill do that for you until hes sufficiently healed. Sorry maam; I just couldnt wait, said Ruby as she rolled off my head onto the bed next to me. How many Willies do you plan to make, anyway. Oh Ruby dear, well start out with just a few - maybe twenty or so, but with time I hope to convert the entire city and eventually the world. Someday soon all men will take his rightful place on their knees in front of their master. I just kind of floated along in dream land and thought about the disease the doc had promised o keep secret so I could keep workin. Dont know if Ruby and Ms Thornton know that itll kill them just like its killin me, but I reckon Ill keep that my secret. After all, I got my comics and toons and reckon Ill soon be eatin all the twats my magination could ever dream of and thats good nuff for me!
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