outing

Back from the hike, this evening, I've found the village strangely crowded, usually the not much customers of the thermal baths don't spend the night here. Linda confirmed me that since that early afternoon an unusual motion and bustle were there. She noticed peoples with a load of goods and some others with musical instruments, large families with animated and rowdy children; in short an out of ordinary situation for this not turistic place. More unusual was don't find any traces of all this when we went out, on the inn threshold, after dinner. The usual quite of the central square in the darkness. But with a great attention one can see , in shadowplay, male and female figures passing in elegant clothes; the humble women of the village, so as is tradition in muslim culture, never go out of their own house, at night; surely it was a special occasion, but we couldn't ask it at anybody, and to quit the only lightened place of the built-up area wasn't a good idea. We were foolhardy, but not so crazy to wander all alone at night in Turkey! Linda, with her eyes half open, didn't share my restlessness, but with an unexpected startup attracted both of us at reality. My guide was appeared suddenly in front of her with his decayed smiling. He dragged us for our clotehs, on the other side of the wide square, the not lightened one, and pointed out a high lightened place on the mountains, where I noticed some ruins the first day, but that he never conducted me to visit. In a ridiculus scene he mimed a dance and asked us, always by means of gestures, if we would like to go there. A nocturnal adventure was what we needed and the enthusiasm in our eyes was enough to him to understand our agreement.

We followed this squat, ill-smelling but nice mountaineer along the narrow, dark lanes between the rude abodes. When I asserted that we were going towards a wrong direction, he imparted us that our western dresses were no good and he could supply to us some others; persuading especially Linda, desirous to wear exotic articles of clothing, while I was conscious of a mysterious and worrying situation. It vanished as soon as we were into his house, where we were received by a merry atmosphere and a confortable western environment with house forniture and satellitar TV, that one can't presume from the modest external look. Maked-up women were preparing for an happening and accepted Linda as an old friend, while my guide let me see a provided wardrobe of traditional dresses. An elderly woman stormed into the room bringing a silver tray and over a decorated bottle with some silver glasses, scolding because obviously were forgotten the elementary but required good manners. My host showed me as these mediterranean people can be affable and violent at the same time, turning out her in a bad way, as I'd never suppose one can do with a senior: so I considered how I was lucky he never get angry when we were into the mountains, but also that we were not waited for and that rich plate could not be ready to use every day, the home was dignified but not grand, it denoted a special situation, but what was? Again this strange sensation of anxiety inside. The lovely mountaineer calmed down and it seems he was seeking to justify himself producing a question of time, so few minutes later Linda and I were into two hand-embroidered, wooly tunics, so smart and comfortable in the fresh air of this altitude.

After fifteen or twenty minutes of hard walking along the restive of an ancient road, whose entrance was hiden by a clump of trees, we were at the old human installation. Immediately we realized that our dressing and our tanning camouflaged us perfectly, we could move at will without arouse curiosity or embarrassment: but why, anyway, all this mystery? Everything was more or less as at the country feasts I was present in Europe, with medieval recallings, ancient musics and clothes, torch lightining, little marketing. Of course here was not a recalling, it was the present and was not for tourists or business, so I decided to let me involve by the excitement of Linda and enjoy the music, the dances, the scents and the flavours of that pleasant night; forgetting my distrust. Therefore I can notice that the people was really more jovial then usually, above all the women who let appreciate their intense faces and, partially their bodies, nomore hidden into their traditional black spacious dresses. Our "cicerone", extinguished the electric torch he used to illuminate our journey, invited us to reach a stall crowded in persons busy to joke and drink. He offered us a drink, showing us as it must be gulped down. A colorless beverage was poured into metal glasses just dry cleaned between a customer and another. Watching Linda, usually so over-nice, take it and gulp down, I understood how she was more relaxed and serene then me; she said it was delightful, so sweet and thick. Also the guide was satisfied, so I drank the non-alcholic liquor, it seemed a withered fruit juice, with the addition of acacia honey, but with a very bitter backflavour, as if you were chewing green grass; was it possible they didn't be conscious of this?

I posed the glass and thanked the mountaineer, who answered me with a bright smile; immediately the troublesome traditional sound hit my ears and I felt all the smiling eyes of the onlookers beging me to dance. I satisfied them and mingling with the joyful people, I enjoyed that summer atmosphere into an exotic country, accompanied by the laughters of the best friend of mine.

After an half hour of pure enjoying I went to a lightless side, to take breath. Here the feast was lived in a different way, there were families in prayer and very smart children with their disquieting eyes; it seems they were waiting for something. I could not watch them, 'cause I felt guilty for my thoughtlessness and turning toward the rocky wall overhanging us, I saw for the first time a recent wood installation, not enlightened, but ready to use and I had the sensation of a dejà-vu. It was like I was the protagonist of "The rats in the wall" by H.P.Lovecraft, and I was going down into the mountain! Linda was near me offering another drink, I told her to go away 'cause there was surely an imminent danger, but she answered me don't be foolish, and moreover we didn't know the way and our guide cannot be found.

The feast goes on more brilliant then ever, the music and the colours, and the people seems to have let go the retrictive brakes. Some men were already almost nude and in order to demonstrate their own courage, hurt themselves with baldes, when a louder rull of drums attracted the attention of the people towards the dark side, I can see some black dressed monks light the torchs on and around the installation: I can't believe it's happening, of course it's just a coreography, but why? We are the only two tourists! I can't resist, I have to see, I approach at the banisters that surrounds the altar followed by Linda, always happy when I swing my starvation; she's laughing, obviously she still considers this just a festival, she doesn't know what is going to happen. Bumping into other bodies I felt they were, like me, dressed just with a tunic and also the women; the traditional muslim pudency was forget for a night. Also Linda, drawen close to me for not to lose me into the crowd, has no bra and I can feel her hard nipples against my back. We are just good friends since childhood and we have never sexually intercourse, anyway is always pleasant her body contact, but not exciting. The crowd is still dancing at the insistent sound of music, is impossible to stay motionless here, while the increased array of the monks is proceeding into their ceremonies: part of them kneel down and start to psalmodize, imitated by everybody when the music suddenly stops and the other officiaitngs ripped the drape exposing the icon of the most reassuring and terrible symbol that humanity invented. She, the one hundred tits Goddess, Mother Earth. Linda is surprised by this and into the roaring of all this people starting to psalmodize, closing stronger to me and kissing me on a cheek, evidently enraptured, she screams into my ear her joy for this feast dedicated to the women. I am going to answer her she is wrong, when my attention is captured by the contemporary entrance of monks carrying eight heavy braziers and of four younger bald guys, dressed in purple. This is the night, my heart goes mad into my breast, I need to undress but an imminent erection represses me, while the sound of the prayers, slowly but louder then that of the istruments orbits all over us into an endless "crescendo".

The monks descend by the altar area and trough a side-door go downside it, as I descend deeper into the mountain; the four guys upside, at first they make ritual gestures for the Goddess, then, accompanied by the followers' prayers, start to dance with a sweet and repeating movement 'till they undress, they clean theirself bodies with fragrant water and pronouncing something I couldn't hear into this deafening noise, in a quick course they seize a black, very sharp stone from a brazier and mutilate their boby of the genital apparatus. The crowd greet the event with a long continuous delivering ululation, wich I joined enjoying one of the greatest orgasm I ever had. Suddenly the music started again, and the celebrations too, but more and more frantic then before, the people was not really dancing, the hands slip into the tunics reciprocally, even some sexual intercourses were consummate; the nature is asking its revenge; so I turn still excited, resolute to fuck Linda for the first time in my life. I find her still kneeled, panting and amazed, but when she see me standing up with an overbearing erection and a large stain of sperm on my tunic, she get frightened and standing up herself to, try to distract me pointing to the altar. There, a group of monks relieve and dress again the four new "Archigalli", one wraps the "presents" and put them at the base of the statue and some others are opening the gates on each side of the banister: all them are bloody and smiling, from their bald heads to naked feet, evidently the floor of the altar area was a grill. Now, pushing across this endless orgiastic crowd, the families that I've seen before to pray in the half-light, they enter into the sacred area and carry their children near the altar. They are more or less ten or twelve years old, they are crying and trembling for this unknown situation and for the unaware of their future. They seek reassourance in their parents, but are just these parents, helped by the monks, who undressed them and with a ritual knife that every family hold, immolate their manhood at the Goddess, then bring them proudly, almost fainted and soiled of blood, across the crowd who revere these little unintentional saints and try to buy to any price their "relics".

Linda clings to me, we're all in a sweat, she throw a leg round my body and I can feel against my buttock the tiny live volcano between her legs; then she screams into my ear, but into this noise it's as she whispers:"Why don't make it, you to?" I had forget that she knows. I said we never sexually intercourse and it's true, but our confidence was such that we often take our shower together, or sometimes we masturbated simultaneously looking at mutually. Once, after a hard work day, we were taking a shower together; we had quarrel for professional questions, during that afternoon, so she, joking came into the bathroom grasping a pair of scissors and said:"If you'll do it again, I will castrate you!" I was naked and I had to turn towards the wall, to hide my erection, but she insisted 'til will not rule me and laughing said: "I was not believing that tou were waiting it!" I tried to joke about it and justify telling it was just a masturbatory fantasy, but didn't succeed to convince her and since that day she share actual everything of me, also this disgrace. "Why don't make it, you to?" I answered :"Because I will regret it!" She insisted:"No, you will regret if you don't take advantage of this occasion." My heart stops to beat, she has pronounced the magical formula, invisible hands undress me and push me towards the altar. The light of the torchs increases until I can see nothing but the Goddess and the body that I'm living, under a purple sky I watch it go upstairs; I feel as the victims climbing the aztec pyramids, I could collaps in every moment if I was alive, but I don't breathe and stop in front of Her. I seize the penis that lose its hardness spraying some prostatic liquid, with the left hand, I seize the black stone with the right one therefore with a rapid gesture I detach it from the body. The heart start to beat madly again, a liquid warm sensation slide along my legs, but I feel no pain, the night sang out the sublime hymn of the seraphs and I honour it stretching up my left arm with his victory trophy at the tip. When I turn, I can see an amorphous multitude of pink carcases acclaiming me. And Linda. With her legs wide apart, she lift up the tunic to her hips and I can see a pill of mucus great as a new born child, come out from her cunt while she has a hysteric orgasm. I come down the staircases towords her, always brandishing my trophy that a lot ask for to have; violets break from the rocks where I settle the feet; I reach her that embraces an kisses me as a brother back from the hereafter.

That night I dreamed about my visit to John the Baptist; he asked me if I would like to be christened in water, if I believed that the Holy Ghost could come down over me doing this. I answered that I could see that white dow flying over my head, but I was not worthy of Its putting down to me. He asked me why, I said because I have a bad habit that I can't stop: I tried so hard, but I can't stop to touch myself. He said to me to undress and pray with Him for my salvation, the water baptism wasn't enough for it, but surely, if I desired it and pray hard a help would come from heaven. In fact, later, a grandiose figure appeared before us seizing a flaming sword. He asked to John with his roaring voice: "Is him the elected? Is him ready for the baptism of fire?" John noddled and held me motionless. I was incredulous that Gabriel the Archangel was talking about me. Then I was surprised and honoured when Him, with an exact downright stroke, cut my cock off.

The morning after I wake up into the inn bedroom. I'm thirsty, I shiver with cold and I'm so tired. The room appeares me as under a fish-eye, hardly I can lift up my head and focalize the scene.When I succeed I've the surprise to see the doctor of the Holiday Village busy above my groin and Linda helping him. I can't move my legs. The doctor has barely ended to suture my wound and inserted a little catheter. Into my head dream and remembrance are mixed, but the only certain sensation I had is confirmed by reality: I am dickless. I lie down again, really surprised of this peacefull sensation, I always thought one have to be desperate after castration; it comes to my mind the poetry of Catullo about the complaints of the next day and I laugh. Linda is over me, watching me. Her face is a mixed one between pity and relief, it's very tried. A masculine voice declares sadly:"It's an ugly wound, I have make what I've been able, but he has lost a lot of blood and would have been better to carry him in a hospital." Linda turns to him and detaining the tears shakes her head to say no. She looks me again and after a sigh says: "Excuse me, but I didn't know who to call, you have done me pendant such a fear! Now he has given you a calmant, but you were suffering so much, were having high fever and have lost a heap of blood." Only listen to her give me the nausea, my head was turning and the room was becoming more spherical then before; the doctor covers me telling that to speak lift up the temperature and of not to force, but I have to know and ask to my friend:"Who carried me here? Might I walk?" Linda said: "Your feet have carried you, certainty that you can walk, or rather, were running. You were seeming gone crazy!" Then she doesn't succeed to detain the tears and the doctor try to distract her wondering between how many days we should leave. "Five days" "Well"he replies "'cause i believe that for the next three or four days he will not be able to walk on, moreover I would like that you passed from me before living the Turkey. If you want I'll able to give you a good address for a prothesis."

Linda doesn't answer and turn looking for an accomplice look, I smile and I force to lift myself head and say:"Then, no climbings, tomorrow!" She is got angry and exclaims:"You already have stunned enough, the mountain!" I Was believing her my pits accomplice, negative surprises me this reaction so say: "Not the mountain has been, but the drink at the festival" She:"You know that here they all are muslims, it was just fruit juice. It seemed that you were amusing, but when they have began to circumcise the children you're literally gone crazy. Have tried many times to strip and to put your hands on me, you were obscene. Your guide and I were compelled to carry you at the inn, to strip, to wash with cold water and to put you into a bed. Half hour later you ran to the bathroom; I've thought you should vomit; I have heard a bustle and I asked what were being, no answer, so I went in the bathroom and saw the scene..." she detains an attempt at vomiting, then, after a little continues:"You had your multifunction knife in the right hand, bloody, you seemed immerse into the blood from the belt to feet and..." another attempt "... you had your left arm pointed to the chandelier, grasping in the hand what you know" and starts to cry. The doctor, who has listened attentive, intervenes:"Don't you remember anything?" I'm displeased for her, I shake my head 'cause I cannot speak, above all, I can't say waht I remember, I would seem crazy. "If you never have assisted to a circumcision, it can be comprehensible..." says the medicine speaking alone "Anyway I was here two hours later, too late to think it was possible attach it again, you have really risked to die." Linda noddling and smiling caresses a cheek of mine. She thanks and dismisses the doctor who teachs her for the following days.

The last day we spent here we went to the ancient remains to bury the fetish that she had preserved into an empty jar of jam. She thought that was right I let my manhood where I decided to lose it.