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My masturbation has begun by coincidence when I was about twelve. I remember I was studying - it was in addition a boring normal day and so I was looking for something to spice things up. From my window I noticed an old housewife on the roof hanging the clothes and up till this moment I am writing I don't know why but I decided to open the window, get on the study-table, take off all my clothes and see whether she would notice or not. It took just few seconds of my thoughts and without touching myself I ejaculated. I didn't know what was happening. I panicked closed the window, got dressed and cleaned the mess but in my mind I wanted to experiment with my penis to get the white substance again. From that day I couldn't stop. My fantasies were getting wilder and wilder changing mature ladies consistently from my teachers to my aunts but after meeting my physics teacher, Maria-Pia, she became the central point. She was not beautiful, actually below normal standards but I became attracted to her.
At school I would notice every move she made wether it was her hands, feet, smile, how she walked, how she dressed, her shoes, the way she joked etc. I was getting obssessed and use all of these to make my masturbations more enjoyable and more diversified until one day someone told me that Kevin, one of my college friends was joking with her about her body and she grabbed his private parts. It was a turning point for my sinnful acts. My savage sexual need worsened as I desparately needed her to touch my parts even punish them cruelly but at least to touch me once that's all. I filled my fantasies of every kind of torture that one could immagine and masturbated and masturbated and masturbated until I couldn't bear any more the friction on my glans. Years passed I left college and continued my studies but still I have kept my sexual painful fantasies of the woman I adored. But my needs grew deeper. I needed her touch. I made up my mind to go and find her at the college after all these years- exactly 6 long years and tell her crudely. I had to, my need became unbearable to live with. The day came. I went to college and found her there. I approached and she was so happy to see me and told me how I had changed etc. The conversation went for a while and then out of the blues I told her; 'I can't get you out of my mind since the day I first saw you. I really fell and still am in love with your body. You have become a constant image I look for. An image I want to adore and serve at all costs. Even if its for only one time and that one time filled with terrible pain from your touch I would still fall for you.' There was a moment of silence. I knew she wouldn't accept but at least I got out what I had harboured fro years in my heart. I quickely turned to leave ashamed when she grabbed my hand. I stopped and turned my eyes to meet hers. She then spoke and said; 'Meet me tonight at 10.00pm in front of the college gate. I'll pick you up.' To be continued ........
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