Henry Gets Relief

You may find it hard to believe but people like Henry and Sarah really do still exist today. Middle class WASP types, not too rich, not too poor, not too smart and not too dumb. She was mainline, and he was from Bucks County. They went to the right church, Anglican, of course, went to boarding school and then college. None of their courses had any practical value that might, heaven forbid, lead to a trade or useful knowledge. Henry got a gentleman’s C, and Sarah got a somewhat more respectable B average. With diplomas in hand they went to work. She as an executive assistant for a shipping company, which is a secretary that cannot type or take dictation. He as a insurance underwriter, for a downtown insurance company, a job that requires no intelligence, merely follow the rules and look things up in the table.

They met at a function, not a party. Having nothing better to do they dated, became engaged, and were married the following June. After the de rigor honeymoon in the Bahamas, they, with the help of both families purchased a condo and settled down to married life. Of course the bought a Beemer, that was a sure thing.

Because of the stasis in which they have been raised, they settled into a routine immediately, they were the type of couple that would not change much in out look or habits in the next forty years. Henry joined a men’s club, not the top, or second best, but still respectable. Sarah had her bridge game once a week, with three friends from college. In a rare moment of humor, Henry had nicknamed Sarah’s friends Muffy, Buffy and Stuffy. He was always amazed that they could communicate in some dialect of WASP speak, that did not require them to move either lips or teeth. During this weekly get together he would retreat to his club. Even though two of the card players were really quite beautiful, in an ice maiden sort of way, he paid no attention to either of them.

Not to belabor a point but Henry and Sarah were dull. This included their sex life, which was at best perfunctory, and at worst unimaginative. Still even dullards have a sex drive, so every Wednesday and Saturday they had sex, minimal foreplay, a few kisses, no hand exploration, just get it up, get it in and a few quick pumps. However, this was quite satisfactory, as this relieved strain and was the only exercise either of them got.

So six times every 28 days, they would get together, never during her period. They were not exactly the shock troops of the sexual revolution.

She became pregnant within the first six months, and the WASP line was about to be continued. Unfortunately she choose and old family friend as a doctor. Political and social connections were the reason he kept his license. During his examination he failed to maintain sanitary conditions. Sarah came down with a case of septicemia, lost the baby and the ability to reproduce.

While this event might have been shattering to some couples, Henry and Sarah took it in stride, within a month of the hospitalization they were back to bridge and club.

Four years passed, routine had set in Sarah was looking forward to the day when Henry became head of underwriting; she would quit work and play bridge twice a week. He would eventually progress to this position not so much through competence, but because he looked like the head of underwriting should look to the stockholders.

Sarah for her part was never really comfortable at the shipping company; all sorts of foreign types from the middle east and Asia came through the firm on a daily basis. She tried to avoid contact with a polite but aloof attitude. As it would happen, one day she was caught short and had to use the unisex bathroom on the first floor. It was quite a mess, both she and the lavatory, she was in the midst of her period, and she stayed in the room much longer than she wanted, changing pads, etc.

About three days later a bright red rash broke out on her legs, and crotch, and progressed, into her vagina. The itching was maddening. At first she tried over the counter nostrums, which did no good at all. Compounding her previous error she went to see the family doctor, who misdiagnosed the condition as herpes, and gave her a prescription for acyclovir. He did do one thing right in a rare momentary flash of insight, he sent out a swabbing to be tested. The prescription did nothing for the chronic itching. The doctor’s office called about a week later and left her a message that it was not herpes after all but some rare fungal infection unknown in the United States.

Sarah for her part was just about to go over the edge. The constant itching in her crotch and vagina; remained while great running sores were forming from her fingernails tearing up the skin. In a moment of temporary insanity she spied a bottle of insecticide by her plants. She read the label and it included a fungicide, why not she thought, so she sprayed herself down with the aerosol can. She screamed and cried from the substance, and finally passed out from the pain. Henry found her in the living room half naked, with the spray can still in her hand. It required a trip to the emergency room, and a week in the hospital, for the first couple of days under heavy sedation. Strangely enough the insecticide did kill her infection, and almost did her in along with the fungus. The itching stopped, her privates healed, and she came home, with lots of rub in cream and instructions to stay away from the garden supplies.

Slowly Sarah healed, and the routine came back and comforted both of them. One area that did not return to normal was their sex life. Unimaginative as it might have been Henry missed playing hide the wiener twice a week. The doctor had suggested that they both avoid sex for thirty days, and give Sarah a chance to heal, and thereafter use a condom, just in case the fungus was still present. They tried this after the aforementioned period, but the pain was too great for Sarah, and they had to cease these attempts.

The bridge club made several suggestions, hand-job suggested Muffy, use you mouth, suggested Buffy, and lay on your stomach and take up the ass was Stuffy’s suggestion.

All of these suggestions were so far beyond the pale for both Henry and Sarah, a trip to Mars would seem easy by comparison.

There is an old joke that says 90% of married men admit to having gone down on their wives, and that the other 10% are liars. Whether the converse is true or not I do not know. But with oral sex becoming as common as shaking hands, Sarah and Henry through lack of imagination or knowledge were left sadly behind.

One evening one of Sarah’s bridge partners called with a suggestion, I think it was Muffy or perhaps Stuffy. She told Sarah of this woman who gave massages, that would relieve Henry’s stress, since is was all manipulative, and there was no penetration, it would not be like going to a prostitute, and there would be no worry about any loathsome disease. A friend in similar circumstances had taken her husband, they had gone for about a year, and the woman told Stuffy or was if Buffy, that now her husband never got frustrated or angry, the woman’s manipulation had left that husband as nice a man as you would want to meet.

Sarah had to think about this one for a while. This seemed like the most logical suggestion, since alternative sex was out for both of them. She called the woman left a message, and about an hour later her call was returned. Sarah explained the situation to the woman. The woman asked Sarah, if a short term or a permanent fix was needed. Sarah assured her it would only be a short-term thing, as she was looking forward to both going sexless by age forty as her parents had. So an appointment was made for Saturday AM.

Sarah had a job on her hands convincing Henry to go. He was embarrassed beyond belief, and somewhat chagrined by the suggestion of a strange individual laying hands on his person. He was a little backed up by the lack of sex now for over two months, and even dull WASP’s have hormones which require some sort of release, so eventually he gave in to the blandishments of Sarah.

Saturday they drove to the address, parked and walked up to a neat well-kept row home. An attractive heavy-set blond woman admitted them, attractive, but built for comfort rather than speed. She offered them tea, and all three chatted about the weather for a few moments.

There was a lull in the conversation the blond turned to Henry and said: “Henry, there in the bedroom is a wrap, go take off you clothes, and put on the wrap, by the time you are done the table will be already for you.”

After about five minutes and embarrassed Henry emerged, with a button wrap, sans clothes. The woman had brought a large massage table into the living room.

“Sarah, you’re going to stay?” Asked Henry.

“Of course she is,” answered the woman, “we are all friends here, now up on the table.”

The woman made no pretenses of a massage; she flipped up the wrap, spread Henry’s legs and began to knead his balls. She fingered him in a manner, as if she was checking for a hernia. Now for most men this would do it, not Henry, he turned bright red, and his little friend went and hid. The woman continued her massage of his balls, working them down and getting the sack good and loose. Still no response from the penis. She began to masturbate Henry, she only needed two fingers, still nothing.

“We are a little shy today, aren’t we.” Said the woman, “There are other ways to make you respond.” From a tray she picked up a penis vacuum device. Not a cheap plastic thing, but the professional sex therapist model, used by surrogates everywhere. She placed the unit of Henry’s penis, and began to expel the air. Pretty soon the little penis came out of hiding and inflated to lengths neither Henry nor Sarah knew were possible.

“There is your little dancing partner, already to do the twist.” The woman slipped a heavy duty rubber band around the base of the penis, so it would not deflate, then she picked up a warm wet wash cloth and masturbated Henry, till he shot all over the place.

“Gee, I have never seen that before.” Said Sarah as she watched the cum fly all over the room.

“Ahh.” said Henry

Before she would allow Henry off the table, the woman worked his balls back down nice and loose, removed the rubber band from his penis, so it could deflate, then placed the rubber band on his balls. “Sometimes this helps a bit, by keeping stray hormones out of the blood. Leave it on till tomorrow morning.” It was not particularly tight, the woman was planning for what she knew would be the eventual conclusion of these sessions, Henry’s balls lying neatly on her table.

So it went. Sarah’s vagina was never going to function properly again, what the fungus hadn’t done the insecticide had. Henry for his part was hooked, the erection, the warm wet washcloth and the expert hand massaging his balls, and his penis, that took care of his tension.

This became a regular Saturday routine, go to the woman’s home, get jerked off, and leave with a rubber band on his balls. Sometimes the little hairs got caught in the rubber band and that hurt like hell, otherwise the rubber band didn’t bother him. Then at the three month mark the woman changed the routine at the end. She introduced Sarah and Henry to a tool; which she referred to it as an elastrator. She explained that this was a really useful tool for removing tension from people, men in particular. “See this is used on humans, right here on the side it says humane.” Said the woman. They bought that line. She banded Henry before he left, tight enough to keep the band in place, but not tight enough to damage anything or cut off circulation. “Use cuticle scissors and cut the tube off tomorrow evening.” Thus the next three months went by.

Just shortly after the six-month mark, the woman received a call, which she then returned. “Hi this is Henry, you know Saturday mornings. I was wondering maybe we could double up, do you say have Wednesday evening free to see me.”

“Why of course Henry, the usual?”

“Yes, but don’t tell Sarah.”

“Of course not, seven p.m. would be fine.” I wondered what was taking so long, now his are mine.

The problem with sex is the more you get the more you want. Henry was getting exquisite pleasure from the hand-jobs. Now a more sexually sophisticated individual would not have been that impressed, but to his mind, with his limited experience this was right there at the top.

Henry double dipping went on for about six weeks, then the woman called Sarah at home, just after Henry had left after his Wednesday milking. “Hello Sarah, I am afraid you have a problem. Henry is now addicted, and it will only get worse, he is not trying to control his base urges, he has been seeing me on Wednesday evenings, now for six weeks. It will not be long before it will become a daily thing, you will have to make a decision here.”

“What sort of decision?”

“Do you wish to keep him as a husband?”

“Why of course I do.” Came Sarah’s shocked reply.

“Then we must take his mind off sex permanently.” Replied the woman.

“By removing the source of his desire, it is a very simple thing, he will be calm afterwards, and will never bother you for sex again. The two of you will live out you lives in peace, with your worrying about him straying, or leaving. He will never leave.”

“What do you do?” Asked a concern Sarah.

“It is a very simple procedure, we remove his little sack, with his two little friends in it, no more male hormones, no more desires. We just tighten the band a little tighter than normal, then a quick snip, and both of your problems are solved.”

“Is there no other way.”

“Not that is as sure a thing as this is, my dear.” Came a syrupy reply.

“Okay, then lets do it Saturday. How many visits will it take.”

“Only one dear, only one.” this time with a smirk. It is good she thought these two do not have any children; there are enough stupid people in the world.

Saturday came; Sarah and Henry trouped into the apartment. Henry no longer hesitated he went right into the bedroom to change.

“Look at my new toy” Said the woman, “it is a band castrator, it uses these tiny little rubber discs, this is much better than rubber bands or the tubing, no adjustments no clips, just one snap and they are done.”

“Is that what it is called, castrating?”

“Yes, it is done all the time today, mostly to cattle of course, but sometimes for men like Henry it is the best solution, you do not want to loose him, but you cannot have sex. It is best to remove his problem.”

Henry came out and hopped up on the table.

“I see we are all ready to go.” Said the woman. “Today is the month end special, so you get three for the price of one. Now to make sure you don’t get too excited, I am going to strap you down.” She proceeded to use to wide band tie downs to secure Henry to the table.Once he was secured, she went to work on his balls, massaging them until they were warm and hanging loosely down. Then she used the vacuum to pump him up. “My goodness Henry, I think our little treatments have made you grow and inch or two, I don’t remember your filling the chamber like this at first.”

Henry gave an embarrassed grin. Off came the vacuum, and off went Henry under the woman’s manual stroking. “That’s good Henry, now lets try it again, we want to really empty your tank today.” She vacuumed him again, and jerked him off for the second time. He dribbled out a little watery fluid.

“Henry, I have talked with Sarah and given her my professional advice, that you should be modified. This is due to her lack of ability to perform her wifely duties, and your increasing need for release. So, after this afternoon you will not longer need a release, I am going to castrate you now.”

“Castrate, I am not familiar with the term.”

“It is done all the time to bulls, sheep, and to men too. I have personally castrated many men. I am going to remove your balls, you will not need sex after they are gone.”

“Oh your joking of course, Sarah, she’s joking isn’t she?”

“No Henry, she explained it all to me and this is for the best, now just relax.” Said Sarah from her seat.

“Don’t be concerned Henry it is not that big a thing, you will be home at the usual time, now hold still while I do you.” The woman massaged Henry’s sack down all nice and loose, his erection was long gone from the two hand jobs. She picked up the band castrator, into which she had already loaded the little green donut. She passed his gonads through the elastic loop and released the tension and the band snapped into place. She was more familiar with the elastrator, which applied the pressure slowly and evenly to the testicles, if done correctly the balls were dead before the subject was aware of his impending loss. Imagine if you will having your testicles, or some other part of your body shrunk down to 1/8” instantly. Henry would have reacted no differently had an NFL place kicker used his balls as a target. He tried to get up, tried to double up, and sucked in about half the air in the room.

“Oh my, that is different, I’ll fix you Henry.” Said the woman, no time for nicey, nicey, she picked up the waiting gelding knife, pulled his balls tight, and sliced off the sack just below the band. Surprisingly, he relaxed when his balls were removed. There were two waiting syringes, one a tetanus shot, and the other a tranquilizer. Of course both of these were meant for horses, but what the heck.

As predicted Henry lost his urge for sex, he calmed down, concentrated on underwriting, and not on hand-jobs with wet wash clothes. At a pool function that summer, one of Sarah’s bridge partners, I think Muffy, but then it could have been Buffy or Stuffy remarked at how well Henry’s Speedo’s fit now that his problem had been solved. Perhaps our husband’s should be similarly modified.

AUTHORS NOTE: A little 25 cent philosophy here. Woman are from earth, men are from earth, deal with it.

Men marry woman hoping they will not change; women marry men hoping to change them. Both wind up being wrong. The man stays the same, and the woman changes. In a quest for improvement the wife makes all sorts of suggestions, which the husband usually ignores. It is the quest for improvement that would allow a woman to consensually have her husband castrated. If one of your wife’s friends has her husband done, and she brags to all the girls and they discuss it, your balls are gone too.