For as long as he could remember, Sádú had loved the Goddess. As a boy, whenever he was not at home, he could be found in her temple, prostrate before her statue or seated on the floor before it gazing blissfully up into the loving benign visage of the Goddess, Mátrà.

    He learned after some years that the acolytes were all eunuchs who could never be men. The prospect of giving up his untried and unused manhood did not distress him. The Goddess would accept as acolytes only pure youths who had never lain with a woman , allowed his body to be polluted by a man, or brought forth his seed by his own efforts.

    At the age of thirteen, Sádú began to be troubled by the temptations of the flesh. He had begun to notice the bodies of girls and was bothered by erotic dreams during which his seed came forth against his wishes. As well, he deeply loved a beautiful boy, a year younger than himself, his dear friend Nánjù.

    Their love was innocent and pure. They had never done anything more erotic than kiss and caress each other, taking great pains to avoid touching the manly parts. Sádú could not imagine that the Goddess would object to this. He did not believe that his love for Nánjù detracted in any way from his devotion to the Goddess. Surely , the Mother would not be jealous of a little boy.

    Later that year, Sádú took his leave of his parents and went alone to the temple to offer himself to the Goddess as an acolyte. The priestess took him into the sanctum where, seated before the great statue of the Goddess, as witness, the priestess questioned Sádú about his life, his devotion to the Goddess, and his purity. She told him that he must no longer share his love with Nánjù but reserve it exclusively for the Goddess for, as an acolyte, he would belong to her alone.

    Sadly, Sádú agreed to the conditions. A few days later, he was instructed in the nature of the initiation which he must undergo and what he was required to do . Those whom the Goddess rejected as unworthy died in the initiation, accursed and doomed.

    The initiation consisted of immersing the would-be acolyte's male parts in a warm solution of hemlock. At first, there would be a pleasant sensation of warmth. Then, suddenly, there would be a feeling of bitter cold in the parts. At that moment, he must speak without delay. The basin of hemlock would be removed and replaced by one of warm water to prevent further absorption of the hemlock. If he delayed in speaking, the cold would spread up into his belly....and he would die.

    Thus were the unworthy rejected. The Goddess held their tongues until it was too late. Sádú realized with a shudder of trepidation, that he would not know until the last moment whether he had been chosen or rejected.

    Sádú's initiation was routine. No one witnessed it except the priestess and the acolytes who assisted her. Sádú was brought into the room naked and told to squat. Two acolytes held him by the shoulders so that he would not fall over. A third acolyte brought a slightly steaming vessel of liquid to him and raised it under his hanging male parts. Relaxed by the warmth, they hung down into the liquid until they were fully immersed.

    Sádú found the warmth pleasant . Very suddenly, though the gentle warmth was replaced by a feeling of intense bitter cold. He cried out "COLD !" Immediately, the acolyte whisked away the basin of hemlock and replaced it by one of warm water, but it did not feel warm to Sádú. The bitter cold persisted, then gradually faded away, to be replaced, not by a feeling of warmth, but by a total absence of any feeling whatsoever. That intense cold was the last thing which Sádú was ever to feel in his organs of manhood.

    Feeling very weak, Sádú was carried to his pallet and covered with a warm blanket, though the evening was not cold. For six days, he remained abed, gradually feeling some, but not all, of his strength returning. His manly parts, poisoned by the hemlock began rapidly to waste away. His stones became shrivelled and wizened to the size of raisins and his member shrank until it was no larger than that of a newborn baby boy.

    At first Sádú's duties an an acolyte were largely janitorial. However, he also received instruction in the nature of the rituals so that, if called upon by the priestess to assist her, he would know what to do. Whatever he was called upon to do, he did cheerfully and willingly, for it was all service to the Goddess whom he loved.

    Never before had Sádú been so happy. He lived in the temple and served the priestess, and, through her, the Goddess. It was his lifelong dream come true. There was, admittedly a bit of wistfulness in his heart at being separated from his beloved Nánjù, but he put it out of his thoughts.

    Still, there was a lingering trepidation in Sádú's heart and he carefully warned Nánjù that it was absolutely imperative that he speak as soon as he felt any sensation of cold in his male parts. Nánjù replied that he had complete confidence in the Goddess' love and that he knew that he had been pure, so that she would have no grounds to reject him.

    Though he did not participate in Nánjù's initiation, Sádú contrived to be present. He watched as the basin of hemlock was brought up under Nánjù's male parts. All seemed to be going well when Nánjù's chin dropped onto his chest. Nánjù was asleep ! "Nánjù, WAKE UP !" shouted Sádú. Nánjù raised his head sleepily and then, shivering, he said "Oh, I feel cold all over. I'm freezing."

    Sádú's heart sank. It was too late; Nánjù was dying.  Sádú rushed to his friend's side as the acolyte removed the hemlock and replaced it with a basin of warm water, too late. Sádú cradled the shivering boy in his arms, weeping. Nánjù tooked up at him and said weakly "I've been rejected. WHY ? I've led a clean pure life. WHY did she reject me ? WHY ? Weeping, Sádú said softly to his dying friend "The Goddess was jealous of our love."  "Sádú, hold me. I feel cold tendrils wrapping about my heart......" And then, Nánjù, beautiful, pure, decent Nánjù was dead.

    The priestess intoned "The will of the Goddess is done. Let all praise the Goddess for she is good and loving." Sádú gave her a look of pure venom and walked out into the sanctum. He had never before been there at night. The statue was illuminated only by two torches before and below it.

    Perhaps it was a trick of the lighting, but her expression seemed wholly changed. The benign loving smile had been replaced by a cruel self-satisfied smirk. Sádú did not prostrate himself as he always had. He stood upright, trembling, not with fear or awe, but with fury. A flame of wrath blazed within him and rang from his boyish treble voice.

    "I have loved you all my life. I have had but one goal all my life: to serve you. And how have you requited my love and service ? You have taken from me the only other person I ever loved, one as worthy to serve you as am I. WHY ? For one reason and only one reason: JEALOUSY ! Immortal and powerful though be, you are no Goddess but only a jealous woman. You are unworthy of my service and my love. I LOVE YOU NO MORE !"

    With these words, Sádú turned on his heel, presenting his back to the goddess, a grave affront even to a mortal woman, and strode purposefully down the aisle, pausing only to take an offering bowl to use as a begging bowl, and walked out of the temple into the starry night.