I don't know why I have a fetish for playing with eunuchs; I just do. Maybe it's because both of my prior eunuch play buddies were on hormone replacement therapy, and they were especially hot and musky and playful for a week or so after their monthly or bimonthly injections. Maybe it's the thought of a eunuch play buddy. I honestly don't know.

One of my former play buddies (call him "Mark") was a full eunuch - castrated very young due to testicular cancer. All he had left was an empty sack with two spermatic cords. The cords themselves were very sensitive, as I learned by mistake one day. He had a very small penis; it couldn't have been more than a couple of inches long when erect. He called it his "root". I thought he was especially hot because he was extremely furry all over, and I love furry men.

He loved his butt being played with. He loved snuggling. Sometimes we laid down and had hot frottage sessions, my hard dick rubbing between his legs and over his root. (He and I both came that way once, actually.) He loved getting his butt eaten, too, and I loved eating it. He was always careful to clean out before one of our play sessions. For a special treat, we both loved my sucking on his erect root; it made him very excited. It was sensitive enough that I could usually bring him off with my mouth in just a few minutes. His load tasted slightly bitter, and was very thin and watery, but was still delicious, made all the more so by his enthusiastic groaning and crying.

Mark's lover of many years abruptly left him one day to go to law school. "Abandoned" was more the right word. Mark lost his job and couldn't find work in the local area, so he begged me to let him live with me as my eunuch houseboy. I said no, because I wasn't into the sexual degredation of eunuchs; I just liked playing with them, and I could barely support myself at the time. He eventually ended up in Southern California, emailing and phoning me with piteous messages begging to live with me. I never saw him again.

Another regular play buddy I had was in the midwest, in a city where I used to live. He was only a half-eunuch; he had lost one ball when he was a baby due to a spermatic cord birth defect. His remaining ball was huge, larger than both of my above-average balls put together. He had a lover, and could only play when the lover was out of town. We loved slipping and sliding around on a big play mat laid down in the bedroom. We sucked and fucked each other into a total stupor. God, he was fun. Eventually, I moved to San Francisco, and lost track of him. I wonder where he is, and I hope he's happy.

Then there's the one that got away.

His name was Tony, and I first saw his picture on the Penectomy forum on Yahoo. It showed a highly attractive hairy man with a pussy instead of a penis.

I wrote to him, and complimented him on the picture. He wrote back, and we started exchanging notes. He confessed that the picture was fake, but that it was his dream; he was saving up to get a penectomy, because he hated having a penis. He liked his penis well enough, but he was tired of sex always being about his dick.

When Tony was in his 20's, he was in several porn movies and magazine photo shoots. He thought the exibitionisim factor would help with his frustration over wanting to be castrated, but the feeling never went away. Tony told me one night, playing with a buddy, he nearly chopped the head off his cock with a burdizzo. It excited him so much, he knew he had to remove the whole thing. He loved the sensation of cold steel up against his groin and a clamp on his urethra.

Despite his Penectomy fantasy photo, Tony was very clear that he wasn't a transexual nor did he want a pussy. He really wanted to be castrated, but was having problems finding a suitable cutter. He had a very specific scene in mind, and since he was only going to get it once, he insisted on it being perfect. He never did get around to telling me the details, other than the major problem was in finding the audience.

He said he'd always wanted to have his cock and balls chopped off, but it had been difficult to find a play buddy with similar fantasies. Despite living in SF, he'd never met a eunuch in person. Now he was looking for a play buddy who would want to play with him AFTER he was nullified.

We made plans to get together - he wanted to fuck me, since he wouldn't be able to do so after being nullified, and he wanted me to fist him, since his butt would be the only sex organ he had left after nullification. Unfortunately, we took turns getting sick, and never managed to get together.

After not hearing from him for a couple of months, I wrote him to see what was going on. He told me he was closing his floral business and moving away from SF because he couldn't stand it any longer. He never told me what was wrong with SF, and didn't say where he was going.

I never heard from him again, despite dropping him several notes. That was four years ago. I wonder how he's doing, and I wish I'd had the chance to play with him, and to watch his nullification. It would have been fun to fist a nullo.

(Tony, if you're reading this and you recognize yourself ... drop me a line via the EA message boards and let me know that you're OK.)

Sometimes I log on to Yahoo Groups, and find pictures of real and simulated nullos, and get really excited over them. Despite the fact that I'm happily partnered to another guy and we both enjoy a great relationship and plenty of fun sex ... I still find the pictures of guys with (simulated) pussies to be totally hot.

Some gay men have sexual fantasies about firemen. I fantasize about playing with a man with a pussy, FTM transman, or male hermaphrodite. I just think it's hot. Don't know why.

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