Judy and Don

Penny and her best friend Judy were having a coffee klatch on their day off from the store, and Penny was relating her recent activities with her husband.

“You did what to Roger.”

“I emasculated him.”

“Whazat?”

“I castrated him, cut his balls off or as the Brits say unmanned him.”

“What the fuck for?”

“Because I could. I got into this site on the Internet, EA, read the stories and got fascinated by them. The stories were all pretty much fantasy, all about women cutting men’s balls off, sometimes their cocks too. Some were set in the future world dominated by women where all men are castrated at age 14 to 26 depending on the author. Our sex life was nothing, not his fault, not mine we are just not sexy.”

“Jeese Penny I always think of your as the ‘great earth mother’ laying there on your back welcoming all comers.”

“Oh Judy, you must be thinking of my sister.”

That broke the both up. “Seriously Judy, no rationalization, no excuses, I did it purely and simply because I could.”

“Well Don and I have a real good sex life, and your story has turned me off so much I don’t think you could get a pin up my cunt with a sledge hammer right now.”

“Judy you have such a way with words, you are so cultured and refeeened.”

“Yeah, fuck it, ain’t it the truth.”

Two weeks later the phone rings in Penny’s kitchen and it is Judy.

“Hi Penny how are you?”

“Fine and yourself?’

“Good, but sore as hell, Don and I started going to that website you told me about, we read a lot of the stories, you know the straight ones, not the ones with the faggots in them. We got so horney we fucked on the living room floor, I was like all the little Indian at Custers Last Stand, I just kept cuming and cuming and cuming, and Don kept at me till his cock was bleeding.”

“Judy you speak so eloquently, Don didn’t have to use a pin and a sledge hammer to get into your cunt?”

“No pin, no sledge hammer.”

“So what’s up.”

“We want to try it.”

“Try what?”

“Your little banding machine, you know just kind of fake it and take it right off.”

“Judy you are a dear sweet person and the best friend I have ever had, but you are also a total airhead.”

“Well gosh.”

“We aren’t talking about a toy here, this is the done deal, the real McCoy, if you put it on wrong you could rupture the cords or damage the vas on either side.”

“Oh please Penny, we will be careful. I wanna do it pleeeease.”

“No, but I will meet you half way. I will come to your house some evening when you two want to play games, and I will band Don, then leave the room and you can fuck each others brains out. But you cannot leave it on for more than 20 minutes because of the danger of clotting.”

“Couldn’t you just put it on kind loose?”

“No it would slip right off.”

“Okay then, be here Sat in 10 days, that will give Don and me time to heal up from last night.”

“It’s a date Judy, let us say 9PM.”

For the next 10 days Penny had this image of a the ‘little train that could’ in her mind with a razor knife in the coal car, and she kept repeating a little piece of doggerel: “I hope I can, I hope I can, I hope I can………………….”

Penny arrived with her contraption in a brown paper bag. They made polite chatter for a few minutes, and she could see that the two of them wanted to get at each other. So she suggested they go to the bedroom. “Judy take his trousers down, and milk his sack down nice and loose, we want to be authentic here. That’s it, move your hand, okay grab his balls and pull is down. One, two, three just like that he is done. Remember 20 minutes max.”

“Right Penny they said in unison.”

Before Penny could get out the door Judy had mounted Don and was starting to hump him.”

Penny repaired to the living where she watched a re-run of an old detective show on channel 11. All the time humming to herself I hope I can etc. At 9:30 she changed that to I think I can, I think I can, at 10PM and a sit com this changed to I guess I can, I guess I can I guess I can. At 10:30 and the news it changed to I can, I can, I can. She grinned to her self. At 11 PM the little train was over the hill and the tune changed to: can, can, can, can, can…………….

She got up from the sofa, and quietly went into the bedroom. They never noticed her. Don was on top pounding away, and Judy was giving him plenty of encouragement by shredding his back with her fingernails. Penny reached in grabbed Don’s balls and with one swift upstroke severed them from his body.

“What the fuck.”

“Sorry Don, your twenty minutes were up.”

“What.”

“I told you two, 20 minutes max. After that it is blood clot city, heart attack, stroke or embolism for old Donny here. Of course there is a deeper reason.”

“What’s that.”

“Because I can.”

Segue: Weekday coffee klatch two weeks later.

“So, is Don still mad at me?” Asked Penny.

“Mad enough to spit, he is still threatening to come over here band your tits and cut them off.”

“More importantly are you still mad at me?”

“Just a little bit. When I used to suck Don off, I would play with his balls while he was coming. Gee, I really do like to do that, I would cum when he shot in my mouth. Now there is nothing for me to play with. Don’t get me wrong, he didn’t force me, it is something I have loved to do since I blew my first date in high school. And I am a swallower, I never spit.” Very proudly.

“Sound kind of one sided to me?”

“Oh no Don went down on me all the time. He loves to lick my pussy, I have to stop him he’d eat me if I didn’t wash for a week.”

“That makes me feel better, knowing that you have reciprocity.”

“No we don’t have that, we had vaccinations.”

“Judy, you are such an airhead and you are a real cunt to boot, and I do love you so.”

“Just as long as you don’t want me to munch on your mound, or munch on mine.”

“No, I told you low sex drive, lack of interest.”

“So what should we do now.”

“My suggestion would be: Better Living Through Chemistry. You know get Don testosterone patches and Viagra. Or you could go to the doctor down in NYC and have implants. I am getting as crude as you, if girls can have plastic tits, why can’t men have plastic cocks.”

“Fucking a Penny, here’s to plastic cocks.” Judy said as she raised her coffee cup in a mock salute.