"By plane," he said.

"That's not what I mean," I said. "I don't have any money; I got maybe five bucks on me; shit, that's not enough for an hamburger and a coke, much less for a plane ticket to California. You gonna pay for it?"

"The Brotherhood will pay for it," he said.

"Who's the Brotherhood?"

"That's more than you need to know right now," he said. "You'll find out, when it's time."

"When it's time? You keep saying that. I don't understand. What's going on?"

What the fuck was going on? I had thought he was just another kid like me - well, almost like me; he had been nullified, after all - but obviously, something was going on. The Brotherhood? What the fuck was that?

"You'll have to be patient," he said. "Of course, you can go home..."

"Yeah," I said, "I can go home and get my nuts cut off - or get nullified."

"Or you can stay and keep them - for now."

I didn't like how he said, "for now," but if I went home, I was losing them for sure.

"OK...OK, I'll stay," I said. We went into his room. "Where am I going to sleep?" There was only one bed in his room, and it was a twin size bed.

"You can sleep with me," he said, "but wear these." He dug some pajama bottoms out of a drawer. "I don't think I trust you to be in bed with me naked."

"What are you going to wear?" I asked. He'd been walking around naked since I'd been there.

He looked down at himself. "I see what you mean," he said. "I don't usually wear anything around the house, when it's warm like this, but maybe, with you around, I should." He pulled another pair of pajamas bottoms out of the drawer and put them on.

In a way, I was disappointed, but if he weren't going to fool around, it was probably for the best. Otherwise, I'd probably have to go into the bathroom and jack off. Goddamn! He turned me on.

I was still hard, when I pulled off my pants to slip on the pajamas. Looking at me, he rolled his eyes and shook his head.

"What?" I said.

"Nothing," he said. "I just had no idea sex was such a powerful drive. It's all you think about. This is going to make my work more difficult than I thought."

"What's your work?" I probed once again.

He shook his head, "Later," he said, crawling into bed. "Shut off the light," he pointed to the light switch next to the door, "and come to bed."

"I got to pee first," I said. Since I'd been hard, I hadn't peed, when we were in the bathroom. "What about your dad? What happens if I run into him?"

"You mean Joseph?"

"Is that your dad?"

"Joseph is my adopted father. Don't worry about Joseph. I told him you were coming over."

"How did you know I was coming over?"

"I knew you would. You don't want to be nullified - or even castrated. Where else would you have gone?"

I shrugged. He was right. Where else would I have gone?

I jacked off in the bathroom. It seemed to be the only way to rid myself of my erection. I kept seeing his smooth crotch.

Peeing, I swirled my stream around the bowl. He had managed to hit the bowl with his, but no way did he have the control of it I did. I splashed some on the floor, and for probably the first time in my life, I stripped some toilet paper off the roll and cleaned it up.

Holding my dick and balls in one hand, I wondered what it would be like to reach down and find nothing but a smooth crotch.

When I returned, he was on his side facing the wall,. Shutting the door, I flipped off the light and crawled in beside him. "Good night," I said.

Fuck, I wanted him to roll over. I wanted to kiss him; I wanted to do more; but at least, I wanted to kiss him. He didn't, though. "Good night," he said.

I listened for a while. Soon, his breathing was shallow and regular. I supposed he was asleep.

I lay awake thinking. Fuck, my world has changed. Would I ever see my dad again? Would I keep my balls and my dick? Apparently, I was keeping them for now, but Joshua said I needed to be nullified - or purified, as he called it. What chance did I have to keep them? What chance did I have of growing up with a cock and balls?

Were we really going to California? If we did, I could leave Joshua and the Holy Nutters behind. OK, I'd have to live on the street, and that was no easy thing for a kid, but I could keep my balls. Fuck it. That's what I'd do. I'd run away from my dad. In California, I'd run away from Joshua. It's not like he was ever gonna let me fool around with him, anyway; and if I stuck around him - as much as he turned me on - I'd be in the bathroom jacking off all the time,.

Shit! I felt a pang in my heart. The thought of leaving him caused me pain. Was I falling in love with the fucker?

I awoke the next morning to someone shaking me. Looking up, I saw a man, about thirty or thirty-five. He had the soft, rounded, features of a eunuch, but a slight shadow of a beard covered his chin and upper lip. I figured it must be Joseph, who, Joshua said, had been nullified.

I glanced toward the wall, certifying what I already knew; Joshua was gone. "Where's Joshua?"

"He's at school," the man said. "He told me to let you sleep in. 'Bout time for you to get up, though. It's almost ten. Come into the kitchen when you're dressed. I'll have breakfast for you. Bacon, eggs, and toast, OK?"

"Yeah, I guess." I usually just had a bowl of cereal. Neither Dad or me were much good at cooking. If a meal couldn't be heated in the microwave or on a stovetop burner, it didn't get fixed.

I swung my legs off the side of the bed. I saw Joseph looking at my crotch. I had my usual morning wood. "Sorry," I said, covering it with my hand. Shit! I was apologizing as much for having a cock as I was for having an erection.

A weak smile raised one side of his mouth. Without speaking, he turned and left the room, closing the door behind him.

I wasn't going to jack off. Honest...I wasn't; but my dick throbbed. Seeing the pajama bottoms Joshua had worn, I picked them up and held them to my nose, smelling - I think - his scent. I ejaculated with the vision of his smooth crotch in my head. Shit! I think I was falling in love with the little fucker.

Breakfast was delicious. I don't think I'd ever had bacon. The eggs were fried, sunny-side up, and I had the choice of blackberry and strawberry jelly to go with the toast. I had both.

"Are you going to eat?" I asked.

"I ate with Joshua," he said. "Your name is Logan?"

"Yeah," I said, and you're Mr.?" I realized I didn't know Joshua's last name.

"Joseph is fine," he said.

"OK," I said. I still didn't know Joshua's last name, but I didn't want to admit to it, so I didn't ask.

I was bored as shit waiting for Joshua to come home. They had no TV; they had a computer, which Joseph let me use; but as Joshua had said, anything good on the Internet was blocked. When I tried some of my favorite porn sites, nothing happened. It was as if they didn't exist.

And there were no games on the computer not even solitaire. I could find plenty of religious shit, all about the Nutters, but not much else. I finally shut the damn thing off.

They didn't even have anything good to read - not that I'm much for reading. Finally, Joshua came home. Another boy was with him. Although not as pretty as Joshua, he looked enough alike him to be his brother, except he had brown hair.

"This is James," Joshua said.

"Are you guys brothers or something?" I asked.

Joshua shrugged. "Half brothers. Gillis fathered both of us; but there are a few hundred of us, so that's not unusual. You'll be meeting more of my brothers." I wondered if that was why he called his outfit the Brotherhood. "Let's go into my room," he added.

Once we were in his room, he shut the door. "What's up?" I asked.

"I want you to show James your," he glanced at my crotch. "He's never seen one."

"Fuck, I don't want to go around showing my dick to everyone."

"I saw what you wore to school yesterday," Joshua said. "You didn't seem to have any trepidation about showing everything you had then."

"What's trepidation?" I asked.

"It didn't bother you to show off your penis. That's more or less what it means."

I shrugged. "That was yesterday." I remembered the shocked look on Joseph's face, and it had been hidden by my pajamas. I remembered the studs' reaction and that of the nullos in the shower. None of them - except for Joshua - would come close to me.

"It's hard again, isn't it?" said Joshua. "That's why you don't want to show it." Fuck yes, it was hard. It had got hard as soon as Joshua had walked in the door. He did that to me. I shrugged. "That's OK," Joshua added. "I want James to see it hard."

I let out my breath in a sigh and pushed down my pants.

James threw up.