I was absolutely obsessed with Jennifer. She was an incredibly cute young woman in her late twenties with her own house, and the sort of gal that had a certain coquettish manner about her. I took her out to a movie, but at the end of the date, she shied away from me just as I was about to kiss her. So, I asked her out again, and again, and again, week after week. Each time, it was the same story. She seemed to enjoy my company, but moved away whenever I tried to touch her. Maybe, I thought, it was a matter of time. Finally, as she was getting out of my car after a movie, I just grabbed her arm, but she pulled away.

After weeks of platonic-style dating, she phoned me and asked if I would come to her house for dinner. Before I could answer, she said, "I want you to meet my new boyfriend, Richard. He's a doctor." I paused and thought. Shit, a doctor. How can I compete against a doctor, when I'm a lowly bookstore clerk? Why does Jennifer want both this Richard guy and me at her house at the same time? Wouldn't this be awkward?

On the other hand, I was curious about this Richard. I wondered who I was competing against. And if the truth be known, I was so besotted with Jennifer that every minute in the room with her was a minute to be treasured, even if I had to share that room with this Richard guy.

The three of us, Richard, Jennifer, and me, had a very nice dinner with a lot of wine. I quickly discovered that Richard was married and had a family of his own. Jennifer was his girlfriend on the side. As the wine flowed and the evening wore on, there were long periods of silence, as though Richard or Jennifer were about to say something, but somehow the atmosphere was so warm and love-filled that I never felt uncomfortable. Richard did not seem to regard me as a threat for the affections of Jennifer.

Then, apparently thinking the time was right, Richard cleared his throat, and said, "I don't know how to raise this, but I have a personal question. Jennifer and I have a bet about you, and you can settle it. I'll come right out and ask, are you bi?"

I just about choked on my wine. I stared at the wall, not sure what to say. Maybe I had a hunch what would happen next. Richard slowly stood up, unzipped his fly, and pulled out his incredibly long cock. It immediately stiffened and became even larger. He and I looked each other in the eyes. I got on my knees and sucked him, right there next to the dinner table, while Jennifer watched.

Richard encouraged me, "That's the way, fag, show Jennifer how much you like sucking cock." He turned to Jennifer and said, "So Jennifer, you were going to let this fag kiss you? Touch you? I bet he doesn't even have a dick." He looked down at me, while I was still licking and sucking, "Hey fag, show us your dick."

I pulled down my trousers and showed them my little thing, which was limp because I felt so nervous. They both laughed. Richard said, "So Jennifer, would you even have felt it if that was in you?"

Jennifer responded, "Hell no, it looks like a swollen clit. But he's the best friend a girl could ask for."

Richard's demeanor changed, and he asked me, "We have a proposition for you. I need someone to live with Jennifer and pretend to be her fiance, so that Jennifer and I can continue to see each other without my wife or anyone else being suspicious. I've been paying a lot of Jennifer's bills, but appearances are really important. You could move into this house and be her pretend-lover."

My head was reeling. So much had been going on this evening. In a few hours I had gone from fantasizing that I had a shot of making love with Jennifer, then I'm giving a blowjob to her boyfriend while she watches, and now this proposition out of the blue.

"The three of us could have some cool threesomes," Jennifer said. "You could blow Richard, and then Richard could fuck me, and you could lick up what's left."

"I think I could do this," I slowly said, not quite sure if my brain had grasped what I was agreeing to.

"That sounds great," Richard replied. "But there's more. I need to be absolutely sure that you can't fuck Jennifer when I'm not here. Her horneyness has to be for me along, and you'll never put anything into her vagina, except maybe your tongue."

"I understand," I said.

"Well, just to make sure you really do understand, I'm going to put you on a dose of androcur, which will put an end to any erections you might be having. I want to be sure that when I'm not here, your weenie is always limp, incapable of erection. You're so little down there, I doubt that you'll even notice any difference."

Well, of course, I'd notice the difference, but I kept that thought to myself. I had always known that I was bi, and furthermore, I had always known that I was into kink. This was definitely kinky, and it was the sort of arrangement I knew that is offered very, very rarely. I gulped and said "Yes, sir."

Richard said, "I just happen to have your first dose of androcur right here. Say goodbye to having your little weenie get stiff! It's nothing but lifelong impotence for you." I swallowed the pill with a gulp. "Just to make sure you stay on schedule, Jennifer here will always watch you take the pill. We don't want you forgetting!" I nodded.

I moved my things into Jennifer's house, and a new life began for me. We lived together like husband and wife, even sleeping in the same bed. I really love Jennifer, and in so many ways it was a dream come true to be so close to her, watching her sleep, doing errands with her.

Twice a week, Richard would come to visit. It always began with me sucking his huge sausage of a cock, and then usually he'd fuck Jennifer while I watched and I'd lick up the mess afterward for both of them. Occasionally, Richard would slide into my ass while Jennifer watched, and it was the unwritten rule that I had to bark like a dog as he fucked me and said demeaning things like "Take it, bitch." Of course neither of them would ever touch my balls or weenie, which after awhile, never got hard anyway.

Richard insisted that I get laser hair removal on every part of my body except my head. Next, he arranged for me to get some large tattoos saying "Man Lover" with a pink triangle, on both my chest and back. Richard said this was so I would never forget, and Jennifer would never forget, that I was a total fag who could never please a woman.

One morning, I woke up next to Jennifer with a morning erection, an old fashioned woodie like I used to get, and it was almost touching her vagina. Jennifer screamed, "That's so gross. What are you doing, pretending to be a man?" I apologized profusely and ran into the bathroom where I jacked off over the sink. A little bit of cum leaked out and I pretended I was a man that was having an orgasm, even though it didn't really feel like anything. It had been a long time since anything like this had ever happened.

That evening when Richard visited, Jennifer told him that I had had a woodie. Richard was angry. "Apparently this course of androcur is not 100% effective. I can't possibly risk you trying to put your little weenie inside Jennifer. I thought I made clear what our roles were. I'm the man, Jennifer is the women, and you're the fag who pretends to be her boyfriend. What part of the word PRETEND do you not understand?"

I hung my head in shame.

"We're going to have to do something more drastic if our little trio is to continue," Richard explained.

"Whatever you want, sir," I responded.

"This is going to be complicated from a surgical standpoint, so we're going to have to do it in my office. Jennifer can assist with the surgery. I'm really going out on a limb for you. I could lose my license over this. But you're a part of our relationship."

The day came for the surgery, late at night when the other staff in the doctor's office had gone home. Local anesthesia was applied to my genital region, and they put up a barrier so I couldn't see what they were doing. Fortunately I couldn't feel anything, either, except the occasional vague tugging sensation, thank heavens for that. When they were done, Richard told me that it might not be a pretty sight because the stitches were new, but that I could now admire his work. Richard and Jennifer took away the fabric barrier and I was stunned at what awaited me.

I expected to be castrated, but my balls and ballsac were still there, intact. What was missing was my penis. I just stared. It was so bizarre to see a ballsac between my legs, and nothing but a scar and peehole where my cock had been.

Richard explained, "At first I thought I'd remove your balls, but then I realized that we want you to be thinking about sex, we want you to feel horny. But now without your cock, you'll have no way of getting sexual release except by having my cock in your butt."

Jennifer took good care of me while I recovered. Of course, I had been peeing while sitting down ever since moving in with her, so there wasn't a big change in my urinary habits. The sight of a ballsac but not dick between my legs was a bizarre sight that I've never really gotten used to.

Pretty soon we were back in our old routine of awaiting Richard's twice-a-week visits to fuck both of us. It was inevitable that we'd give him the nickname "Big Dick." Jennifer and I would often chat about how much we enjoyed feeling his manhood stretch us and fill us up.

Occasionally, Richard would humiliate me during these sexual sessions, knowing how much it turned me on. "Show us your big cock," he's say, and I would stand up and show off my crotch, with only a ballsac where a dick would normally be. "And to think you had ideas you'd fuck Jennifer. Now look at you."

Jennifer would then lay down in front of me, spread eagle, and playfully taunt me, "Fuck me now. I won't play hard to get. I want you to put your dick in me right now. I'm so horny. Oh what's wrong, you don't even have a dick! What a shame because if you had a dick, you'd be fucking me right now and making me squeal." As she said these things, I would finger my ballsac.

When Jennifer became pregnant with Richard's baby, it became evident that Jennifer and I needed to marry to keep up appearances. We would raise Richard's baby as our own. I was excited by the thought of Jennifer's growing belly, knowing we would all become even closer as a trio. Jennifer talked often about what a thrill it would be for her to produce milk and nurse her baby.

One evening with Richard, Jennifer asked if I, too, might be able to nurse the baby, perhaps with a bit of pharmaceutical help. The idea that I might grow some boobs to breastfeed Richard and Jennifer's baby was very appealing.

Richard thought about it at length. Finally, he gave his decision. "Jennifer, you must always be the only woman in this arrangement." Then Richard looked at me, "You will always be the genderless freak. You can never be a man or a woman. I'm afraid that if you nurse our baby with your breasts, you'll start thinking you're a woman, which you can never be."

Richard's decision was that one of my nipples would be surgically removed, and the other nipple would be allowed to develop with some hormonal help. Richard decided I was to become a one-breast dickless freak. At least I'd be able to help Jennifer, a real woman with two real breasts, to nurse our baby.

After he removed the one nipple, the hormones helped my other breast to develop. It was such a thrill watching my nipple puff up and become itchy, and then have the entire breast develop. Each night, Jennifer would help me by massaging hormonal cream into my one developing breast. As her belly grew due to the developing baby, my breast also grew. My chest looked bizarre with the one developed breast, and not even a nipple on the other side of my chest, but I loved my androgynous role in our trio. Soon enough, our baby would be nursing at my one developed breast.

And to think.... there was a time, not so long ago, when I thought I could be Jennifer's lover.

[Posted in 2008 by meewasin/at/excite.com]